O hai
Hello. I'm a grown up now.
I found this and thought "Oh boy this cringe, should I delete it?" And decided against it because its my own history and I'm confident nobody will read it anyway.
So yeah I'm still here, navigating my way through life the best I can. It hasnt always been kind to me (shocker 😂).
So it's been a spicy 7 years since my last entry. I graduated from Teesside Uni in 2016 with a 2:1 in Biological Sciences. I was hopeful it would lead me to a good life but it didnt really work out that way.
I spent the 2 years following applying for work, and not just science jobs, aldi and stuff too, I was submitting several applications per day, and receiving several rejections the next day. I declined quickly, my depression got worse and worse to the point where I only left the house to take my son to school and buy supplies. The poverty was hard too, we often needed help from food banks. I felt like a failure and that there was no hope. I got very overweight and things felt catastrophically bleak.
An opportunity arose in 2018 which I am still working on today. Technically I should have completed it in 2019 but it has been complicated and I'm not at liberty to discuss this. I'll just say I am hopeful.
So 2019-2021 I spent working on physical fitness and health. I lost all the weight I had gained due to severe depression and then some. It felt good, finally sometjing went right. I accept that I went too far with it and ended up being underweight for a while, but now I work on maintaining a healthy weight.
I finally accessed the mental health care I have desperately needed for nearly 2 decades. Therapy is hard work. Its not nice or gentle, its painful and can be distressing at times, but the end goal means its worth it. To feel better and do better, you need to come out of your comfort zone. I've risen to it with the bravery of a warrior and I am already reaping the rewards.
So what else can I say? I'm doing everything I need to do in order to live a good life. And that's my #1 objective, a good life for me and my son. I want a good life.
I found this and thought "Oh boy this cringe, should I delete it?" And decided against it because its my own history and I'm confident nobody will read it anyway.
So yeah I'm still here, navigating my way through life the best I can. It hasnt always been kind to me (shocker 😂).
So it's been a spicy 7 years since my last entry. I graduated from Teesside Uni in 2016 with a 2:1 in Biological Sciences. I was hopeful it would lead me to a good life but it didnt really work out that way.
I spent the 2 years following applying for work, and not just science jobs, aldi and stuff too, I was submitting several applications per day, and receiving several rejections the next day. I declined quickly, my depression got worse and worse to the point where I only left the house to take my son to school and buy supplies. The poverty was hard too, we often needed help from food banks. I felt like a failure and that there was no hope. I got very overweight and things felt catastrophically bleak.
An opportunity arose in 2018 which I am still working on today. Technically I should have completed it in 2019 but it has been complicated and I'm not at liberty to discuss this. I'll just say I am hopeful.
So 2019-2021 I spent working on physical fitness and health. I lost all the weight I had gained due to severe depression and then some. It felt good, finally sometjing went right. I accept that I went too far with it and ended up being underweight for a while, but now I work on maintaining a healthy weight.
I finally accessed the mental health care I have desperately needed for nearly 2 decades. Therapy is hard work. Its not nice or gentle, its painful and can be distressing at times, but the end goal means its worth it. To feel better and do better, you need to come out of your comfort zone. I've risen to it with the bravery of a warrior and I am already reaping the rewards.
So what else can I say? I'm doing everything I need to do in order to live a good life. And that's my #1 objective, a good life for me and my son. I want a good life.