"Trapped in Ba Sing Se" Endnotes
Last year, I published my original outline for my Maikka Fortnight story, commenting on how I changed my plans in the writing phase and why. I wasn't planning on doing the same thing this year, as my story was meant to be a lighthearted series of comedic events, but then a plot butted in and brought its annoying friends, the subplots. Since I have an original outline, anyway, I might as well post it for those who are interested in the writing process.
For those who haven't read "Trapped in Ba Sing Se," here are the links, and let it be known that it is very much not a mere shipping fic, for better or for worse. I recommend reading the story before these notes, otherwise stuff will get spoiled and/or you won't have the foggiest idea what I'm talking about in my retrospective comments.
deviantArt: http://loopy777.deviantart.com/gallery/38991836
FanFiction.net: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8397057/1/Maikka_Week_2012_Trapped_in_Ba_Sing_Se
As with last year, the plaintext are my original notes while anything bold in the spoiler cuts are my current comments. Discussion and criticisms are welcome.
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----MAIKKA WEEK 2012----
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It's Mai and Sokka fun in wartime Ba Sing Se!
Instead of Katara letting Sokka go to meet with Hakoda after Long Feng's arrest, she takes the opportunity to go work out her Daddy-issues or something. Aang drops her off on the way to the Guru, and heads off to learn the Avatar State. Toph goes to supposedly meet with her parents, but it's a trap and she's captured by her old masters.
Meanwhile, Azula and her lackeys infiltrate the Earth King's inner circle by pretending to be the Kyoshi Warriors.
Aang: Works with the Guru as seen in the cartoon, but instead of his final lesson being interrupted by a vision of a captured Katara, he achieves Spiritual Enlightenment, and stays on to get complete control of the Avatar State.
Katara: Hangs with her Daddy, working out their issues until Aang returns to pick her up and take her out on their first date or something.
Toph: Just like in the cartoon she escapes using Metalbending, but returns to the city before the others get there, since Aang never gets his vision about Katara being in danger. Of course, without Appa around, she has to run the whole way back to the Upper Ring.
Appa: With Aang. Duh.
Momo: Stays with Sokka. DON'T FORGET THIS, ME!!
[Commentary]
So, this was my mission statement, written before anything else. I had only a vague idea about what Mai and Sokka would be doing here, but I knew they'd be stuck in Ba Sing Se, so I first mentally sorted the rest of the cast so that I wouldn't lose track of them. The entry on Momo amuses me, because I was very worried about the fact that I was leaving him with Sokka in the same way he stayed with Katara in the cartoon. It made sense for Momo to stay in Ba Sing Se, but I have never really included the lemur in any of my other stories aside from quick cameos, so I was very afraid that between one scene in the next he would disappear and everyone but me would notice. I didn't wind up making much use of Momo for this very reason, keeping him contained in the gAang's Upper Ring house for most of the story, but I made sure to acknowledge him when appropriate, such as when Zuko and Iroh hiding out in the gAang's house for a while, and the short prologue section to the last chapter, which basically consists of acknowledging that Momo's back alone at the house again. When I did use him, though, I think he added a nice element; having characters interact with an animal is a good way to add worthwhile description to a dialogue-heavy section.
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INITIAL TIMELINE Note to self: Aang's experiences with the Guru exist in a place free from time. Don't even try to peg it down. It's physics-defying and stuff.
[Commentary]
My first step in figuring out my plot was creating a timeline for it based on the cartoon events. Stuff goes down in a very precise order in the duology that consists of "The Guru" and "The Crossroads of Destiny," and I didn't want to screw with that. If Azula doesn't depose the Earth King until the afternoon of the third day, for example, I didn't want to change that plan unless my AU actually had a reason to. I left Aang's stuff out purely out of laziness; I didn't want to even think about reconciling the various backgrounds of his sessions with the Guru with times of day or proceedings in Ba Sing Se. Looking back at the timeline, I didn't even really need to bother, anyway, since I was able to peg events down to enough precision for my own purposes, and it's not like I dealt directly with most of these events.
Day 1 Morning: Aang, Katara, & Toph leave, while the Dangerous Ladies arrive.
Day 1 Afternoon: Katara arrives at Hakoda's camp. The Earth King receives the Kyoshi Warriors in his throne room and reveals both the Invasion plan and Long Feng's treachery. Sokka attends the Council of Five's planning session Did this happen on the Outer Wall? No, the screenshots show a nice neighborhood. So why did it take Katara two days to walk the plans to the Earth King? Sokka leaves to deliver the plans to the King. Aang meets the Guru. Toph is transported outside Ba Sing Se?
[Commentary]
Even the DVD Commentary on the actual episode notes that Katara took a long time to bring the Invasion plans to the Earth King, but it wasn't until I had to figure out where she started from that I realized just how egregious the error is. She takes a full 24 hours to walk across the Upper Ring! Or at least, that's what's implied. I couldn't come up with a justification for this, so I abused the nature of visual storytelling. Although the military base looks fancy in its brief external shot in the cartoon, I placed it in the Lower Ring, with the justification that the General of the Wall would need to be able to get back to his post more quickly than coming from the Upper Ring. So now, it's a matter of transporting the plans across most of the city, instead of a few blocks. I still don't know what Katara took so long, even if she started in the Lower Ring, but perhaps I'll write that comedy someday.
Day 1 Night: Azula talks with Mai & Ty Lee, reveals plan to use Dai Li to capture Ba Sing Se.
Day 2 Morning: Hakoda tries to bond with Katara, then gets word of four approaching Fire Nation ships. Iroh and Zuko open tea shop. Dangerous Ladies guard Earth King, Mai cleans bear poop?
[Commentary]
The timeline quickly becomes an odd mix of mapping out the cartoon and mapping out my AU version of events. I didn't have a plot at this point, but I did know where everyone but Mai and Sokka would be, so I more and more turned to mapping out the cartoon. It was very helpful, because I couldn't let Mai and Sokka mess with the events and make an AU until I knew the proper order of the original events.
Day 2 Afternoon: Mai and Ty Lee give disinformation to Dai Li spies.
Day 2 Evening: Toph discovers Metalbending. Zuko and Iroh are still having a busy teatime, just as Katara *would* have reached the Upper Ring.
Day 2 Night: Toph invents Metalbending and frees herself. Katara *would* have arrived in the Earth King's throne room to find the fake Kyoshi Warriors. Aang would have gotten his vision and left to pick up Sokka and race back to Ba Sing Se.
Day 2 Latenight: Azula is dragged out of her room by Dai Li to meet Long Feng in jail. Zuko and Iroh are cleaning up the teashop and get an invitation to serve tea to the Earth King.
Day 3 Morning: Toph gets past Outer Wall. If Aang were turning to save Katara, he *would* overtake her here. Azula addresses Dai Li about the planned coup. Iroh and Zuko arrive to serve tea to the Earth King, and are ambushed by Dai Li and Azula; Iroh escapes, Zuko is captured.
Day 3 Afternoon: Aang and company *would* meet the Earth King if they had returned; Toph has no reason to, now, if she were even back by now. Zuko is imprisoned underground. Aang *would* return home to look for Katara, and meet Iroh. Everything happens up through the Council of Five being arrested. Sokka and Toph *would* reach the Earth King, try to fight the fake Kyoshi's, get captured by Azula. Long Feng is betrayed by Azula and arrested.
Day 3 Night: Aang and Iroh *would* find Zuko and Katara, fight Azula, get betrayed by Zuko, Aang dies, yadda yadda yadda. Sokka and Toph *would* escape with Earth King and rescue Bosco.
Hm, not a lot is happening on Days 2 and 3 without my plot. Well, at least I mapped out the events that I have to adhere to and figured out the cartoon's original timeline.[Commentary]
Gee, Loopy, ya think? Why do I talk to myself in my own notes?
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THE PLOT
1. Long Distance
The end of 'The Earth King.' Because Sokka and Aang aren't going on a "little men-only man trip," Aang successfully confesses to Katara, who is much more receptive to the idea now that their side seems to be ascendant. She kisses Aang, and while she clarifies that she's not sure how they go from here and that they should focus on making the invasion happen, she admits that she likes him in turn and wants to be with him after the war. Sokka is floored by this, but before he can start on "oogies," the Earth King arrives to deliver his formal farewells. The guard arrives as scripted, and announces the arrival of the 'Kyoshi Warriors.' Sokka forgets all about Kataang at the prospect of seeing his own girlfriend again, and getting to hang out with her unsupervised. He vouches for them to the Earth King, who in turn announces, "Then we shall welcome them as honored guests!"
Cut to the fake KW's, who are waiting outside the palace gate. Azula gloats about their deception, and Mai imagines Azula giving an Evil Overlord-style speech about their victory, complete with MWAHAHA, because Mai thinks that Azula is the Evil Overlord type. A palace runner brings word that the KW's are to be received formally by the King on the front steps of the palace. The runner also apologizes, and explains that while the Avatar and his group wanted to attend, such a ceremony is by tradition for Earth Kingdom citizens only. He also winks at 'Suki'/Azula and says that once the formal welcoming is over, a certain Water Tribe Warrior will be eager to see her. Azula blanches and hisses, "Dragon droppings!" She didn't expect the gAang to still be there, and so quickly insinuated into the Earth King's company. Still, it's just the stupid Water Tribe boy, so he shouldn't be too hard to handle. He'll recognize Azula, so it's just a matter of keeping him from seeing 'Suki.' Ty Lee eagerly volunteers to distract him, but Azula shoots the idea down. Ty Lee is just as memorable as Azula, in her own way, and he might recognize her from all her previous shameless flirting. Mai, however, is completely unmemorable so long as she doesn't reveal her knives, or so Azula reasons. She decides that Mai will be assigned with running interference. Mai sighs.
[Commentary]
I mapped out the first chapter with a lot detail because it had a lot to set up with this AU, and the ideas for the details came quickly, such as Azula cursing with "Dragon droppings!" I try to write down these ideas as much as possible because I have a horrible memory for anything I haven't written down. The idea about Mai dubbing Azula's speech with something more ridiculous didn't end up getting used in this chapter, but I made good use of it in future chapters when events called for Azula to deliver dialogue straight from the cartoon. Instead of subjecting readers to speech they already now, I did something new and humorous.
Unable to see 'Suki,' Sokka (with Momo) goes to the big Council of Five meeting just within the Inner Wall. He travels there via train with General How. Sokka impolitely asks how How could be the King's direct subordinate but not hint that a war is going on. How gets defensive about being a coward when it comes to Long Feng. Unseen, a Dai Li agent with an inflated sense of importance, and a lack of understanding about everything, spies on them as part of his regular assignment. During the meeting, Sokka badmouths General Fong as being crazy even though he called Sokka brave?
Mai takes the train down to the Council meeting, and catches another Dai Li agent, one who is a complete jobber and really likes custard tarts, spying on her. She does something to draw him out and capture him, then intimidates or bribes him into sabataging the train in a way that will put it out of commission for twenty four hours.
Mai finds Sokka (and Momo) coming out of the Council of Five's meeting, and professes to be a new recruit from the far side of Kyoshi Island, sent by Suki while she's busy to guard Sokka from Fire Nation spies or something. They make for the train, but find it out of comission. Unable to get back to the inner ring, Sokka decides to find another way back to the palace and his girlfriend. Mai decides to tag along. The two stupid, stupid Dai Li agents meet and decide to team up, since their charges have as well.
[Commentary]
The two Dai Li agents changed a bit from my original concepts for them. I was inspired by having read the comic "Bone" recently, in which two recurring antagonists are the "stupid, stupid rat creatures" (one of whom has a quiche obsession) who can't do anything right. I figured I'd do something similar with these Dai Li, making them completely incompetent at their jobs. In the final writing, they ended up being a bit more capable, which was the first instance of some elements of this story being treated more seriously than I intended and contributing to the final mash-up of plotlines. In any event, the final version of the Dai Li agents wound up more like characters in a "buddy cop comedy" which is much more appropriate for the characters and setting, anyway.
2. Road Trip
With the train still out of commission ("You broke it *that* badly?! I just wanted a night's delay! Stupid, stupid Dai Li!"), Sokka (with Momo) resolves to find another way back from the Lower Ring to the city proper. Mai tags along because no way is she hanging out in a boring military base while Azula conquers a glorious jewel of civilization. They encounter Jin and ally with her? They have wacky escapades in the Lower Ring, and a nice walk together in the Middle Ring, before getting back to the Palace later at night. Mai gets back to Azula and Ty Lee just in time to see Azula get dragged away to meet with Long Feng.
[Commentary]
There was much less detail in this summary, as I consider myself very good at coming up with humorous shenanigans and figured I could make them up as I wrote. The dialogue excerpt I included seems to assume that Mai would still be in contact with the Dai Li agent she bullied into helping her, which obviously didn't carry over. That element seems to assume a trickier, more deceptive Mai who is actively managing the situation, rather than the way I portrayed her as in over her head and completely unsure how to trick people. Even this early, I was aiming to include Jin, although I didn't come up with a way to do it at this point. I knew it would be a massive coincidence, but figured that the lighthearted nature of the story would let me get away with her reappearance. I would go on to abuse this heavily.
3. Layers
The next day, Azula takes command of the traitorous Dai Li, and captures Zuko. Mai finds out about it, and recruits Sokka (and Iroh?) to help free Zuko. During the kerfluffle, Sokka finds out that Mai isn't a Kyoshi Warrior, but is actually the Fire Nation Gloomy Girl Who Sighs A Lot! DUN DUN DUN! (Hm, maybe he and Zuko kidnap her as well? If so, have Ty Lee lampshade how surprisingly little time she's spent with Mai over the last few days. Then again, I'm not sure where I would go from that. She wouldn't join the resistance unless Maiko were in play, and Maikka is nowhere near substantial enough to justify betraying Azula. What good would having Mai tied up and in Zuko and Sokka's possession do?)
[Commentary]
This obviously changed greatly, other than my plan for what specific cartoon events would be dealt with. I started writing intending to have Sokka rescue Zuko from captivity, but couldn't find a way to get him to the Zutara Love Cave. My original attempt had Sokka deducing that the Dai Li wouldn't be able to smuggle prisoners out of the palace, so their prison must be underground. That assumption struck me as completely illogical, because why couldn't a team of Earthbenders transport prisoners underground? So Sokka proved to be even cleverer than me and figured out a way to head off the ambush before Zuko was captured. I still wanted to get Sokka and Zuko to join forces, but in the writing, their personalities resisted, and so I just had Sokka faint and Azula launch her coup early.
4. Assassin or Concealed Weapon or Kidnap or Catch
Sokka starts Le Resistance of Ba Sing Se! And Mai is sent to assassinate him! Or Sokka and Zuko go to assassinate the Dangerous Ladies! Iroh gets involved, and pushes Zuko towards Ty Lee and tries to get Sokka to seduce Mai so that Zuko won't be sniffing around her anymore, because Iroh is totally a Ty Luko shipper and thoroughly dislikes Mai! I have no idea what I'm doing! Okay, time to be serious about this comedy. Azula is trying to suppress the local rebellions and establish control over the city, but a team of rebels called Team Boomerang (because it has "boom" in it) is attacking Dai Li and rallying the citizens. Mai and Ty Lee are sent to infiltrate the rebels, and Mai is specifically tasked with taking out the leader. She discovers that the "leader" is Sokka (Iroh's idea, because he knows the leader will be the target of Azula's wrath?) and doesn't go through with it. She and Ty Lee get captured, and Iroh arranges for each boy to deal with and/or interrogate the girl he wants them to be with. Or, Jin is part of the resistance, and now that Zuko is a heroic Firebender fallen prince, she's even more all over him and Zuko can't claim that it's complicated anymore? Anyway, in the end, Ty Lee escapes, and Sokka decides to let Mai go.
4 ALTERNATE. Catch
Iroh sends Sokka and Zuko to double team Azula and ambush her when she least expects it, thus defeating the new Fire Nation regime in Ba Sing Se with one shot, since she's the only thing keeping the Dai Li in line. He briefs the two teens, explaining that a defecting servant from the palace provided Azula's precise schedule. What he's hiding is that he's actually keeping both teens out of the way while he and a team of mercenary/bandits go in to assassinate Azula. By Iroh's design, Zuko winds up bumping into Ty Lee, and Sokka into Mai, leading to romantic comedy slapstick moments. Both boys escape in time to find out that Iroh and his friends had an epic showdown with Azula, but there were surprises and betrayals and stuff, and the end result is that Azula still lives but now Long Feng has escaped. (Ooh, or maybe freeing Long Feng was Iroh's plan all along, and he never really wanted to assassinate his niece. That's a good idea, glad you thought of it.)
[Commentary]
And at this point, my plans hit a major bump. I obviously wasn't committed to this idea, given that I reworked it three times from two different points of view right here in the outline. I had a bunch of ideas for teasing an attraction between Zuko and Ty Lee, including having Zuko bursting into "assassinate" her while she's taking a bath, but nothing was coming to me about how to deal with Mai and Sokka's interactions. Iroh comes across as a lot more manipulating and amoral in these ideas, which was intended to be part of the comedy, that his characterization in the cartoon was a facade. In the writing, though, I was treating the general situation as more serious than my original plans, so that wouldn't have worked. In the end, I only had time and space to simply team Sokka up with Zuko and Iroh, rather than starting a whole resistance, which would have mandated more of a time skip than I wanted to deal with. Their mission to the palace became a prison break, which worked out much better than "assassinatings." I didn't come up with having Sokka get captured until I was doing the writing, which goes to show that my use of the Maikka Week themes is just guesswork. Jin still managed to show up, though. At least I got one thing right.
5. Assassin or Colors
Toph shows up, having had to walk all the way back to the palace from getting kidnapped and break through every wall she encountered! She hears the story of what's happened so far from Iroh, decides that Sokka and Mai are totally knocking boots, and goes to avenge both Suki and her own jealous heart! Wow, that sounds silly. Anything else I can beef it up with? Since I want to do Long Feng in the next entry, how about Toph accidentally breaks him out? But where's the Maikka? Does Sokka have to go save Mai's life from Toph? Meh, I hope I come up with something before I have to write this. Also, where's Momo?
[Commentary]
I don't know why I even bother planning. The only thing that stayed from this batch of ideas was Toph arriving, and I have no idea how I was originally intending to reconcile that with Iroh and Sokka having already had time to start their own Resistance. Where was Toph all time? Taking the scenic route? Thanks to my more serious, ongoing plot in the written story, though, I had plenty of material for Mai and Sokka in the final version, with Mai trying to fix her life and Sokka trying to figure out what's going on. Also, I was aching to bring Long Feng into things, as evidenced by my suggestion in the previous chapter's summary that Iroh frees him, so instead I had Azula come to him in this chapter. This was the start of things getting too complicated, because if I was going to deal with Azula and Long Feng, why was I exploring Zuko and Iroh as well, on top of Mai and Sokka interacting? Never mind that the state of Ba Sing Se was already becoming a character in its own right, albeit one who remained in the background. The "Colors" theme was going to be a reference to how all the factions pledged allegience to a different color, but Toph didn't even have an understanding of the concept; the chapter was supposed to primarily be from her POV.
6. Stress
It's Sokka and Mai versus a fugitive Long Feng in a fight to the finish! Long Feng escaped Azula's prison and, revealing Iroh's identity as the Dragon of the West, steals the resistance from him and Zuko and Sokka. Azula realizes that with Long Feng's knowledge of the city, he can keep an organized rebellion going forever, so she has the Dai Li start purging the city and conducting witch hunts. When Long Feng is forced to react in the open to save his wealthy supporters, Mai and Ty Lee attack him at the same time, while everyone is surprised to find Iroh and Zuko and Sokka trying to save those same wealthy supporters in an effort to earn their loyalty away from Long Feng. Free for all fight! In the end, Long Feng is defeated when Azula arrives, and Mai comes up with a way to let Iroh, Zuko, and Sokka go free. She's disturbed to realize that it was primarily for Sokka's sake that she did it.
[Commentary]
La dee da. I added the last bit solely to add some Maikka to this idea, but it was awful of me. Mai wouldn't have been that invested at this point, unless I was assuming that they were making some major connections in all the awesome Maikka scenes I wasn't planning out at all.
7. Catch or Dance if you can somehow come up with a way to use it because Catch would be better for #4.
Aang shows up with Katara and uses the Avatar state to whup Azula's butt and free Ba Sing Se. She, Ty Lee, and Mai escape. At the end of the whole story, Sokka advises the gAang to go the Fire Nation ahead of the Invasion, and save who they can among the good, having been shown by Mai that Fire Nationals aren't all bad. Indicate hope that when he reaches the Capital, Mai might switch sides.
[Commentary]
This chapter was meant to be a gag chapter, with Aang showing up and using the Avatar state to fix everything that had happened in the previous chapters. It would be a horrible ending, suitable only for the least serious of farces. No wonder I threw it away. As you can also see, I also wound up throwing away my plans for both Sokka and Mai's character arcs. The only thing I kept was the idea of Azula escaping. As usual, I’m loath to have Sokka solve Aang’s problems for him, so I wanted to have Azula escape. However, Azula would have to escape after Aang arrived, and Aang has full control of the Avatar State at this point. How would she manage it from the middle of Ba Sing Se? This is partially why the final battle of the final version of the fic ended up in a huge lake; Azula could just go underwater to hide from everyone, use her blue fire to rocket away, and come up for air a distance away and swim away. No walls or guards or anything to interfere.
--REVISED PLAN--
[Commentary]
I realized after I wrote out Chapter 3 that my original plans weren't going to work, so I opened up my Notes file again and tried to replan everything. Chapter 4 was already in the process of being written at this point, so I included what I had already done. Personally, I'm proud of myself for realizing that I needed a new map before I wound up in a trainwreck.
4. Catch
Sokka and Zuko break into the palace and rescue the Earth King. Azula gets more paranoid as she loses control of Ba Sing Se. Sokka winds up captured and Azula confronts Mai about what role she's playing in things.
5. Stress
Mai makes excuses to Azula that get her off her back for now, but Azula gets Mai to agree to restrictions in order to prove her innocence. With the Earth King uniting the Resistance movements, at least acting as an icon around which they can all revolve and so work out their own ways of cooperating, and Toph helping out on the Outer Wall, Azula is rapidly losing her window for conquering Ba Sing Se. Plus, it's likely that the Earth King could be sending for his own reinforcements. Azula isn't crazy yet, so she decides to roll with the punches and take a partial victory. She decides to turn Ba Sing Se into a quagmire that will drain Earth Kingdom resources and never be able to support the Invasion. To this end, she releases Long Feng and gives him back the Dai Li, who never actually betrayed him here, kind of sort of. She tells him that it wasn't safe to release him before, and he outwardly accepts this, but doesn't trust the Princess. Which Azula herself is fine with. Meanwhile, Mai gets Ty Lee to help her meet with Sokka, and they have it out.
[Commentary]
I actually stuck to this plan pretty closely, but I'm disturbed by how little Maikka I included here. My subplots are starting to overtake me.
6. Colors
With the Outer Wall secured, Toph moves into the city. The Resistance of Ba Sing Se is more or less organized now, and the riots in the Lower Ring are quelled for now. She goes to Team Avatar's house and finds Zuko and Iroh hiding out there with Jin (and Momo!), in the hopes that the rest of Team Avatar would show up. She learns what happened to Sokka, and immediately wants to rescue him. Iroh agrees, but Zuko takes some convincing. Meanwhile, Azula prepares to leave. She lets "leak" the news about Sokka being transferred as a prisoner, but really plans to draw Zuko out of hiding, offer him a ride home, and get out of there herself.
[Commentary]
Again, I was doing pretty well. I didn't realize my two Buddy Cop Dai Li agents would be the source of the leak until I began writing, but I once that idea came to me, I immediately figured out the full scope of the rest of their plot. The only question left was whether I was going to kill them at the end in a Black Comedy kind of way.
The use of the "Colors" title was still in my plans at this point, although nothing in the summary here indicates that I was still thinking about the actual theme. I'm glad I came up with the idea of the "Concealed Weapon" theme, because it fits things much more closely with all the main movers and shakers preparing traps for each other using secret allies. The scene at the end of the chapter, where Mai strips Sokka and gives him some actual concealed weapons so that he can be her metaphorical concealed weapon, recycled an old idea I had for a Maikka one-shot but never bothered with, wherein Mai outfits Sokka with weapons for a mission of some kind, taking his measurements like a tailor and trying out different kinds of weapon-holders on his body, while Suki watches and seethes at how touchy-feeling the whole thing gets. I prefer the implementation of it in "Trapped in Ba Sing Se," where it's played for comedy yet reflects the way the characters are starting to connect, much better. Jealous girlfriends are trite, anyway.
7. Dance
War! It's the Fire Nation versus the Dai Li versus the Resistance, with Hakoda's fleet knocking on the door! Long Feng has betrayed Azula and is trying to kill both her and all her enemies (Zuko and Team Avatar). Sokka and Mai weather the battle, and then Aang arrives to settle things. Azula is captured, but convinces Zuko to free her? I dunno, I'll figure it out when I get there. Thanks for playing!
[Commentary]
So, this is my first pass at the final chapter, wisely left vague until it was time to be written. As you can see, the only things I’m really banking on are a big battle between everyone, and Zuko going back to the Fire Nation willingly with Azula. Zuko’s journey is a bit all over the place in this story; I seemed at first to be building towards pairing him with Jin and putting him on the Earth Kingdom’s side, then I suddenly switch here and have him rejoin the Fire Nation despite it all. Am I just hewing too close to the canon events? Well, yes and no. One of the themes I was dealing with here was the idea of picking sides, and how people can work together and connect as individuals without actually being on the same side. Zuko works with Sokka throughout the whole story, but goes back to the Fire Nation in the end. Mai comes to be loyal to Sokka, but she doesn’t want to join his team at any point. Sending everyone off to fight for different sides in the end was my way of illustrating that, despite all this, these people still managed to help and care for each other, and it may be possible again in the future, once the war is done. For some reason, I thought this an appropriate exploration for a shipping week fic that should be all about romance.
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OTHER IDEAS
Dai Li as overall villains? When Sokka discovers that Mai is Fire Nation, he has to get over wanting revenge for Yue and Suki. Maybe he can't bring himself to hit a girl?
[Commentary]
The Dai Li were villains, but the rest was never used. Ah well.
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DANCE OUTLINE
[Commentary]
What follows was the full outline I made for the final chapter just before I began writing it. I realized that I had far too many plotlines and character arcs to resolve than I could keep track of in my head while writing, so I wisely took the time to plot out how I would resolve them and in what order. Most of these ideas occurred to me in a general sense before I wrote all this out, but coming up with the sequence before I actually tried writing was a huge help and time-saver. I stuck pretty closely to my plan, changing things only for practical concerns, so I won’t comment on any of it. The only thing interesting left to say is that I revised this plan while I was typing it out, moving events around by cutting and pasting paragraphs.
The arrival of Katara and the Water Tribe fleet especially got moved around a lot. I was originally going to use it as a dramatic rescue, but between Iroh, Toph, Katara, and Aang, I had more dramatic rescues than I had problems to solve, so Katara’s arrival got moved up and actually became something more of a complication in terms of narrative significance. Also up in the air was the number of times Azula and Long Feng betrayed each other. I was originally going to have them comedically keep teaming up at every new complication in their plans, then fighting again as soon as they escaped the threat. The Dai Li were originally even going to bind Zuko and Sokka with their rock-gloves and toss at least Sokka overboard, so that Mai could save him. Instead, I sank Azula’s ship, and everyone but Sokka was in the command tower at the time and so were able to escape some other way.
Starts with Sokka being retrieved from the palace. Azula unchains him, but handcuffs him behind his back and puts the key on a chain around her neck that she slips into her tunic. Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee are taking him to their Fire Nation ship. Nominally, they're departing, but really they're luring Zuko and Iroh out of hiding.
They ride outside the city. As they arrive at the marina on the Western Serpent’s Pass lake that's been co-opted by the Fire Nation, Mai, Sokka, and Ty Lee all trade significant glances and stuff. As they step out of the carriage, Zuko reveals himself and challenges Azula to an Agni Kai! Azula declines, grabs Sokka as a human shield, then orders Mai and Ty Lee to go after Zuko. Iroh comes out of hiding and joins in the battle. He engages Mai, at one point catching one of her blades in his hand, while Ty Lee attacks Zuko. It quickly becomes clear to all participants that everyone is purposefully holding back.
Sokka meanwhile snarks at Azula for being a coward and holding him so closely. That's when Long Feng shows up with his Dai Li. Long Feng directly attacks her with a large force. More agents attack the Firebender escort, Zuko, Mai, Iroh, and Ty, but they all team up to defeat them, exchanging notes while they do so. Zuko tells Ty Lee not to hold back against him. Mai tells Iroh to take Zuko and run, but Iroh refuses, saying that they have to rescue Sokka, too, and asks if she's onboard with that plan.
Azula fights with Long Feng, while holding onto Sokka with one hand, and trades insults with the Dai Li leader. She claims that she suspected he would betray her, but she's disappointed that he couldn't accept a good thing when he had it handed to him. Sokka, getting tired of it all, uses Azula's distraction to spin and knee her in the stomach, then uses Long Feng's surprise to take the opportunity to head-butt him off his feet and kick him in the head a few times. He tries to run away, but Azula recovers and throws enough fire to head him off. Sokka turns around and realizes he's about to face a mad Azula with his hands tied behind his back when The Resistance shows up and launches an attack. Azula, for the first time, realizes that she may be a little outgunned here.
Azula and Long Feng trade glances, and agree to a temporary truce. They both head for the ship, covering each other, pushing Sokka back forth between each other. When they get close enough, Azula sees that Ty Lee is already aboard with Zuko, so she boards with Long Feng and a handful of Dai Li and Firebenders, and orders the ship to put out to sea. Ty Lee is appalled that Mai is being left behind, and Azula has a moment where she really seems to regret it, but she says that they have to get away with Zuko while they can, and can come back for Mai and Iroh later. Then she orders Long Feng and the Dai Li taken captive along with Zuko and Sokka, and without Bendables, they can't resist.
Mai is left trapped with Iroh and most of the Dai Li. With the help of The Resistance, they defeat their opponents, and Mai checks out the situation. She is surprised to be abandoned by Azula, but not really hurt. Iroh tells her that he's will to let her "escape" The Resistance, and asks what she really wants to do.
Meanwhile, Azula's ship is going full speed ahead, and makes plans to rendevouz with the rest of their fleet. But that's when they the Water Tribe fleet comes up on them, having sailed up from Chameleon Bay and crossed over the Serpent's Pass. Both they and the Fire Nation navy will be upon them at the same time. It's going to be a massive navy battle.
Below decks, Firebenders bring all the Dai Li, Zuko, and Sokka below decks, but Zuko lets Sokka now that it's time to make a move if he has one. Sokka uses the key he slipped away from Azula when he attacked her to unhandcuff himself. Zuko reveals that he's not paralyzed at all. They fight off their guards, *and* the Dai Li, but between Zuko's Firebending and the knives Mai gave Sokka, they manage to defeat the whole group.Sokka asks if Zuko was really counting on Ty Lee not to really fight him and Sokka being able to free himself. Zuko says no, it's good that they didn't have to wait for rescue, but there was a contingency plan.
Deeper in the ship, Toph pops out of her hiding place with Jin as her spotter; they had snuck aboard the ship in the night by Toph creating a temporary door in the hull. She wrecks the engine and the ship coasts to a halt.
Sokka and Zuko emerge on the deck to discover that a huge navy battle is going on around them, and their ship has already taken damage from ice projectiles. They find Katara on the Water Tribe flagship, and she's sending giant waves out at the Fire Nation ships. Her wave strikes one ship coming to Azula's ship's defense, and the two Fire Nation ships collide. Azula's ship tips, then the conning tower breaks off at the base and the forces full capsize the ship. Everyone goes overboard, and Sokka is trapped with the sinking tower.
Mai and Iroh arrive in a small pleasure yacht that Iroh is powering with Firebending just in time to see Sokka into the drink. Mai jumps in the water to save him, risking her life to free him from the metal wreckage. When they come up, they find the battle in chaos, people drowning and generally everything is awful and they have to tread water and hope for a rescue. Mai admits that she might have saved Sokka from a quick drowning only for them to be killed in the battle, or drowning when they get exhauseted from treading water.
Then a light flares briefly in the sky, and a human figure ascends from a small cloud that's moving against the wind. An Airbending enhanced voice proclaims, "No more fighting. No one dies today." The seas respond, calming, forming a plane of ice beneath the drowning sailors. The Fire Nation ships are pierced by ice spires, breaking them. The fighting is over.
Jin finds Zuko pushing a life raft off the ice, and asks where he's going. He says that everything in Ba Sing Se, this whole battle, is proof that the Fire Nation has lost its way. He needs to return home to make sure this never happens again, that his father finds out what needs to be fixed. He kisses Jin goodbye, hopes in the liferaft, and uses his Firebending to get it up to speed. He is soon lost to sight.
Azula is swimming away, sure that death by drowning is preferable to being captured by the Avatar. Zuko finds her, and offers her room in his boat. Azula reflects that they're both failures, that she can no longer cast stones and claim to be without sin. Accepting that she misjudged herself and Zuko, she accepts his help and promises to get him back to the Fire Nation. They abscond.
Back at the Marina, there's a big reunion. Iroh is upset that Zuko didn't return, but is at least mollified that he isn't dead. He offers refuge to Mai and Ty Lee, and Mai wonders how long she'll stick with him and where she might go. The gAang has to get ready for the Invasion; while Ba Sing Se is reduced, it can still help, and Iroh pledges to bring his own friends in on the idea. He notes that while the Fire Nation knows that they're coming and have the plans, Iroh knows what the Fire Nation will be expecting, and that can be its own advantage. Sokka also wants to free all the Kyoshi Warriors before the Invasion.
As they prepare to part, Sokka gives Mai and huge hug and gives her a whale-bone knife that he got from the other Water Tribe marriors. Mai snarks about it being part of a dead animal, but accepts it.
In the last scene, Zhuang and Laotao reflect that they're going to have to work for a living now doing honest toil, but they both like that. They had been raised to be Dai Li, but they like the new world of possibilities ahead of them. They resolve to get some custard tarts soon, and ride into the sunset.
Epilogue- a year or two later, single Sokka is in the colonies dealing with the colony issues. He spots Mai, they approach each other all dramatic, and Sokka says, "Hello, lover." Mai snarks at how horrible a line that is, and Sokka points that she didn't object to the title of lover. Mai raises her eyebrows, smiles, and says nothing.
[Commentary]
I only just realized that I moved the whalebone knife exchange from the last chapter to the epilogue. I think it works better there, where it's not solely a symbolic gesture, it's also part of Sokka and Mai's new partnership and shared profession.
For those who haven't read "Trapped in Ba Sing Se," here are the links, and let it be known that it is very much not a mere shipping fic, for better or for worse. I recommend reading the story before these notes, otherwise stuff will get spoiled and/or you won't have the foggiest idea what I'm talking about in my retrospective comments.
deviantArt: http://loopy777.deviantart.com/gallery/38991836
FanFiction.net: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8397057/1/Maikka_Week_2012_Trapped_in_Ba_Sing_Se
As with last year, the plaintext are my original notes while anything bold in the spoiler cuts are my current comments. Discussion and criticisms are welcome.
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----MAIKKA WEEK 2012----
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It's Mai and Sokka fun in wartime Ba Sing Se!
Instead of Katara letting Sokka go to meet with Hakoda after Long Feng's arrest, she takes the opportunity to go work out her Daddy-issues or something. Aang drops her off on the way to the Guru, and heads off to learn the Avatar State. Toph goes to supposedly meet with her parents, but it's a trap and she's captured by her old masters.
Meanwhile, Azula and her lackeys infiltrate the Earth King's inner circle by pretending to be the Kyoshi Warriors.
Aang: Works with the Guru as seen in the cartoon, but instead of his final lesson being interrupted by a vision of a captured Katara, he achieves Spiritual Enlightenment, and stays on to get complete control of the Avatar State.
Katara: Hangs with her Daddy, working out their issues until Aang returns to pick her up and take her out on their first date or something.
Toph: Just like in the cartoon she escapes using Metalbending, but returns to the city before the others get there, since Aang never gets his vision about Katara being in danger. Of course, without Appa around, she has to run the whole way back to the Upper Ring.
Appa: With Aang. Duh.
Momo: Stays with Sokka. DON'T FORGET THIS, ME!!
[Commentary]
So, this was my mission statement, written before anything else. I had only a vague idea about what Mai and Sokka would be doing here, but I knew they'd be stuck in Ba Sing Se, so I first mentally sorted the rest of the cast so that I wouldn't lose track of them. The entry on Momo amuses me, because I was very worried about the fact that I was leaving him with Sokka in the same way he stayed with Katara in the cartoon. It made sense for Momo to stay in Ba Sing Se, but I have never really included the lemur in any of my other stories aside from quick cameos, so I was very afraid that between one scene in the next he would disappear and everyone but me would notice. I didn't wind up making much use of Momo for this very reason, keeping him contained in the gAang's Upper Ring house for most of the story, but I made sure to acknowledge him when appropriate, such as when Zuko and Iroh hiding out in the gAang's house for a while, and the short prologue section to the last chapter, which basically consists of acknowledging that Momo's back alone at the house again. When I did use him, though, I think he added a nice element; having characters interact with an animal is a good way to add worthwhile description to a dialogue-heavy section.
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INITIAL TIMELINE Note to self: Aang's experiences with the Guru exist in a place free from time. Don't even try to peg it down. It's physics-defying and stuff.
[Commentary]
My first step in figuring out my plot was creating a timeline for it based on the cartoon events. Stuff goes down in a very precise order in the duology that consists of "The Guru" and "The Crossroads of Destiny," and I didn't want to screw with that. If Azula doesn't depose the Earth King until the afternoon of the third day, for example, I didn't want to change that plan unless my AU actually had a reason to. I left Aang's stuff out purely out of laziness; I didn't want to even think about reconciling the various backgrounds of his sessions with the Guru with times of day or proceedings in Ba Sing Se. Looking back at the timeline, I didn't even really need to bother, anyway, since I was able to peg events down to enough precision for my own purposes, and it's not like I dealt directly with most of these events.
Day 1 Morning: Aang, Katara, & Toph leave, while the Dangerous Ladies arrive.
Day 1 Afternoon: Katara arrives at Hakoda's camp. The Earth King receives the Kyoshi Warriors in his throne room and reveals both the Invasion plan and Long Feng's treachery. Sokka attends the Council of Five's planning session Did this happen on the Outer Wall? No, the screenshots show a nice neighborhood. So why did it take Katara two days to walk the plans to the Earth King? Sokka leaves to deliver the plans to the King. Aang meets the Guru. Toph is transported outside Ba Sing Se?
[Commentary]
Even the DVD Commentary on the actual episode notes that Katara took a long time to bring the Invasion plans to the Earth King, but it wasn't until I had to figure out where she started from that I realized just how egregious the error is. She takes a full 24 hours to walk across the Upper Ring! Or at least, that's what's implied. I couldn't come up with a justification for this, so I abused the nature of visual storytelling. Although the military base looks fancy in its brief external shot in the cartoon, I placed it in the Lower Ring, with the justification that the General of the Wall would need to be able to get back to his post more quickly than coming from the Upper Ring. So now, it's a matter of transporting the plans across most of the city, instead of a few blocks. I still don't know what Katara took so long, even if she started in the Lower Ring, but perhaps I'll write that comedy someday.
Day 1 Night: Azula talks with Mai & Ty Lee, reveals plan to use Dai Li to capture Ba Sing Se.
Day 2 Morning: Hakoda tries to bond with Katara, then gets word of four approaching Fire Nation ships. Iroh and Zuko open tea shop. Dangerous Ladies guard Earth King, Mai cleans bear poop?
[Commentary]
The timeline quickly becomes an odd mix of mapping out the cartoon and mapping out my AU version of events. I didn't have a plot at this point, but I did know where everyone but Mai and Sokka would be, so I more and more turned to mapping out the cartoon. It was very helpful, because I couldn't let Mai and Sokka mess with the events and make an AU until I knew the proper order of the original events.
Day 2 Afternoon: Mai and Ty Lee give disinformation to Dai Li spies.
Day 2 Evening: Toph discovers Metalbending. Zuko and Iroh are still having a busy teatime, just as Katara *would* have reached the Upper Ring.
Day 2 Night: Toph invents Metalbending and frees herself. Katara *would* have arrived in the Earth King's throne room to find the fake Kyoshi Warriors. Aang would have gotten his vision and left to pick up Sokka and race back to Ba Sing Se.
Day 2 Latenight: Azula is dragged out of her room by Dai Li to meet Long Feng in jail. Zuko and Iroh are cleaning up the teashop and get an invitation to serve tea to the Earth King.
Day 3 Morning: Toph gets past Outer Wall. If Aang were turning to save Katara, he *would* overtake her here. Azula addresses Dai Li about the planned coup. Iroh and Zuko arrive to serve tea to the Earth King, and are ambushed by Dai Li and Azula; Iroh escapes, Zuko is captured.
Day 3 Afternoon: Aang and company *would* meet the Earth King if they had returned; Toph has no reason to, now, if she were even back by now. Zuko is imprisoned underground. Aang *would* return home to look for Katara, and meet Iroh. Everything happens up through the Council of Five being arrested. Sokka and Toph *would* reach the Earth King, try to fight the fake Kyoshi's, get captured by Azula. Long Feng is betrayed by Azula and arrested.
Day 3 Night: Aang and Iroh *would* find Zuko and Katara, fight Azula, get betrayed by Zuko, Aang dies, yadda yadda yadda. Sokka and Toph *would* escape with Earth King and rescue Bosco.
Hm, not a lot is happening on Days 2 and 3 without my plot. Well, at least I mapped out the events that I have to adhere to and figured out the cartoon's original timeline.[Commentary]
Gee, Loopy, ya think? Why do I talk to myself in my own notes?
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THE PLOT
1. Long Distance
The end of 'The Earth King.' Because Sokka and Aang aren't going on a "little men-only man trip," Aang successfully confesses to Katara, who is much more receptive to the idea now that their side seems to be ascendant. She kisses Aang, and while she clarifies that she's not sure how they go from here and that they should focus on making the invasion happen, she admits that she likes him in turn and wants to be with him after the war. Sokka is floored by this, but before he can start on "oogies," the Earth King arrives to deliver his formal farewells. The guard arrives as scripted, and announces the arrival of the 'Kyoshi Warriors.' Sokka forgets all about Kataang at the prospect of seeing his own girlfriend again, and getting to hang out with her unsupervised. He vouches for them to the Earth King, who in turn announces, "Then we shall welcome them as honored guests!"
Cut to the fake KW's, who are waiting outside the palace gate. Azula gloats about their deception, and Mai imagines Azula giving an Evil Overlord-style speech about their victory, complete with MWAHAHA, because Mai thinks that Azula is the Evil Overlord type. A palace runner brings word that the KW's are to be received formally by the King on the front steps of the palace. The runner also apologizes, and explains that while the Avatar and his group wanted to attend, such a ceremony is by tradition for Earth Kingdom citizens only. He also winks at 'Suki'/Azula and says that once the formal welcoming is over, a certain Water Tribe Warrior will be eager to see her. Azula blanches and hisses, "Dragon droppings!" She didn't expect the gAang to still be there, and so quickly insinuated into the Earth King's company. Still, it's just the stupid Water Tribe boy, so he shouldn't be too hard to handle. He'll recognize Azula, so it's just a matter of keeping him from seeing 'Suki.' Ty Lee eagerly volunteers to distract him, but Azula shoots the idea down. Ty Lee is just as memorable as Azula, in her own way, and he might recognize her from all her previous shameless flirting. Mai, however, is completely unmemorable so long as she doesn't reveal her knives, or so Azula reasons. She decides that Mai will be assigned with running interference. Mai sighs.
[Commentary]
I mapped out the first chapter with a lot detail because it had a lot to set up with this AU, and the ideas for the details came quickly, such as Azula cursing with "Dragon droppings!" I try to write down these ideas as much as possible because I have a horrible memory for anything I haven't written down. The idea about Mai dubbing Azula's speech with something more ridiculous didn't end up getting used in this chapter, but I made good use of it in future chapters when events called for Azula to deliver dialogue straight from the cartoon. Instead of subjecting readers to speech they already now, I did something new and humorous.
Unable to see 'Suki,' Sokka (with Momo) goes to the big Council of Five meeting just within the Inner Wall. He travels there via train with General How. Sokka impolitely asks how How could be the King's direct subordinate but not hint that a war is going on. How gets defensive about being a coward when it comes to Long Feng. Unseen, a Dai Li agent with an inflated sense of importance, and a lack of understanding about everything, spies on them as part of his regular assignment. During the meeting, Sokka badmouths General Fong as being crazy even though he called Sokka brave?
Mai takes the train down to the Council meeting, and catches another Dai Li agent, one who is a complete jobber and really likes custard tarts, spying on her. She does something to draw him out and capture him, then intimidates or bribes him into sabataging the train in a way that will put it out of commission for twenty four hours.
Mai finds Sokka (and Momo) coming out of the Council of Five's meeting, and professes to be a new recruit from the far side of Kyoshi Island, sent by Suki while she's busy to guard Sokka from Fire Nation spies or something. They make for the train, but find it out of comission. Unable to get back to the inner ring, Sokka decides to find another way back to the palace and his girlfriend. Mai decides to tag along. The two stupid, stupid Dai Li agents meet and decide to team up, since their charges have as well.
[Commentary]
The two Dai Li agents changed a bit from my original concepts for them. I was inspired by having read the comic "Bone" recently, in which two recurring antagonists are the "stupid, stupid rat creatures" (one of whom has a quiche obsession) who can't do anything right. I figured I'd do something similar with these Dai Li, making them completely incompetent at their jobs. In the final writing, they ended up being a bit more capable, which was the first instance of some elements of this story being treated more seriously than I intended and contributing to the final mash-up of plotlines. In any event, the final version of the Dai Li agents wound up more like characters in a "buddy cop comedy" which is much more appropriate for the characters and setting, anyway.
2. Road Trip
With the train still out of commission ("You broke it *that* badly?! I just wanted a night's delay! Stupid, stupid Dai Li!"), Sokka (with Momo) resolves to find another way back from the Lower Ring to the city proper. Mai tags along because no way is she hanging out in a boring military base while Azula conquers a glorious jewel of civilization. They encounter Jin and ally with her? They have wacky escapades in the Lower Ring, and a nice walk together in the Middle Ring, before getting back to the Palace later at night. Mai gets back to Azula and Ty Lee just in time to see Azula get dragged away to meet with Long Feng.
[Commentary]
There was much less detail in this summary, as I consider myself very good at coming up with humorous shenanigans and figured I could make them up as I wrote. The dialogue excerpt I included seems to assume that Mai would still be in contact with the Dai Li agent she bullied into helping her, which obviously didn't carry over. That element seems to assume a trickier, more deceptive Mai who is actively managing the situation, rather than the way I portrayed her as in over her head and completely unsure how to trick people. Even this early, I was aiming to include Jin, although I didn't come up with a way to do it at this point. I knew it would be a massive coincidence, but figured that the lighthearted nature of the story would let me get away with her reappearance. I would go on to abuse this heavily.
3. Layers
The next day, Azula takes command of the traitorous Dai Li, and captures Zuko. Mai finds out about it, and recruits Sokka (and Iroh?) to help free Zuko. During the kerfluffle, Sokka finds out that Mai isn't a Kyoshi Warrior, but is actually the Fire Nation Gloomy Girl Who Sighs A Lot! DUN DUN DUN! (Hm, maybe he and Zuko kidnap her as well? If so, have Ty Lee lampshade how surprisingly little time she's spent with Mai over the last few days. Then again, I'm not sure where I would go from that. She wouldn't join the resistance unless Maiko were in play, and Maikka is nowhere near substantial enough to justify betraying Azula. What good would having Mai tied up and in Zuko and Sokka's possession do?)
[Commentary]
This obviously changed greatly, other than my plan for what specific cartoon events would be dealt with. I started writing intending to have Sokka rescue Zuko from captivity, but couldn't find a way to get him to the Zutara Love Cave. My original attempt had Sokka deducing that the Dai Li wouldn't be able to smuggle prisoners out of the palace, so their prison must be underground. That assumption struck me as completely illogical, because why couldn't a team of Earthbenders transport prisoners underground? So Sokka proved to be even cleverer than me and figured out a way to head off the ambush before Zuko was captured. I still wanted to get Sokka and Zuko to join forces, but in the writing, their personalities resisted, and so I just had Sokka faint and Azula launch her coup early.
4. Assassin or Concealed Weapon or Kidnap or Catch
Sokka starts Le Resistance of Ba Sing Se! And Mai is sent to assassinate him! Or Sokka and Zuko go to assassinate the Dangerous Ladies! Iroh gets involved, and pushes Zuko towards Ty Lee and tries to get Sokka to seduce Mai so that Zuko won't be sniffing around her anymore, because Iroh is totally a Ty Luko shipper and thoroughly dislikes Mai! I have no idea what I'm doing! Okay, time to be serious about this comedy. Azula is trying to suppress the local rebellions and establish control over the city, but a team of rebels called Team Boomerang (because it has "boom" in it) is attacking Dai Li and rallying the citizens. Mai and Ty Lee are sent to infiltrate the rebels, and Mai is specifically tasked with taking out the leader. She discovers that the "leader" is Sokka (Iroh's idea, because he knows the leader will be the target of Azula's wrath?) and doesn't go through with it. She and Ty Lee get captured, and Iroh arranges for each boy to deal with and/or interrogate the girl he wants them to be with. Or, Jin is part of the resistance, and now that Zuko is a heroic Firebender fallen prince, she's even more all over him and Zuko can't claim that it's complicated anymore? Anyway, in the end, Ty Lee escapes, and Sokka decides to let Mai go.
4 ALTERNATE. Catch
Iroh sends Sokka and Zuko to double team Azula and ambush her when she least expects it, thus defeating the new Fire Nation regime in Ba Sing Se with one shot, since she's the only thing keeping the Dai Li in line. He briefs the two teens, explaining that a defecting servant from the palace provided Azula's precise schedule. What he's hiding is that he's actually keeping both teens out of the way while he and a team of mercenary/bandits go in to assassinate Azula. By Iroh's design, Zuko winds up bumping into Ty Lee, and Sokka into Mai, leading to romantic comedy slapstick moments. Both boys escape in time to find out that Iroh and his friends had an epic showdown with Azula, but there were surprises and betrayals and stuff, and the end result is that Azula still lives but now Long Feng has escaped. (Ooh, or maybe freeing Long Feng was Iroh's plan all along, and he never really wanted to assassinate his niece. That's a good idea, glad you thought of it.)
[Commentary]
And at this point, my plans hit a major bump. I obviously wasn't committed to this idea, given that I reworked it three times from two different points of view right here in the outline. I had a bunch of ideas for teasing an attraction between Zuko and Ty Lee, including having Zuko bursting into "assassinate" her while she's taking a bath, but nothing was coming to me about how to deal with Mai and Sokka's interactions. Iroh comes across as a lot more manipulating and amoral in these ideas, which was intended to be part of the comedy, that his characterization in the cartoon was a facade. In the writing, though, I was treating the general situation as more serious than my original plans, so that wouldn't have worked. In the end, I only had time and space to simply team Sokka up with Zuko and Iroh, rather than starting a whole resistance, which would have mandated more of a time skip than I wanted to deal with. Their mission to the palace became a prison break, which worked out much better than "assassinatings." I didn't come up with having Sokka get captured until I was doing the writing, which goes to show that my use of the Maikka Week themes is just guesswork. Jin still managed to show up, though. At least I got one thing right.
5. Assassin or Colors
Toph shows up, having had to walk all the way back to the palace from getting kidnapped and break through every wall she encountered! She hears the story of what's happened so far from Iroh, decides that Sokka and Mai are totally knocking boots, and goes to avenge both Suki and her own jealous heart! Wow, that sounds silly. Anything else I can beef it up with? Since I want to do Long Feng in the next entry, how about Toph accidentally breaks him out? But where's the Maikka? Does Sokka have to go save Mai's life from Toph? Meh, I hope I come up with something before I have to write this. Also, where's Momo?
[Commentary]
I don't know why I even bother planning. The only thing that stayed from this batch of ideas was Toph arriving, and I have no idea how I was originally intending to reconcile that with Iroh and Sokka having already had time to start their own Resistance. Where was Toph all time? Taking the scenic route? Thanks to my more serious, ongoing plot in the written story, though, I had plenty of material for Mai and Sokka in the final version, with Mai trying to fix her life and Sokka trying to figure out what's going on. Also, I was aching to bring Long Feng into things, as evidenced by my suggestion in the previous chapter's summary that Iroh frees him, so instead I had Azula come to him in this chapter. This was the start of things getting too complicated, because if I was going to deal with Azula and Long Feng, why was I exploring Zuko and Iroh as well, on top of Mai and Sokka interacting? Never mind that the state of Ba Sing Se was already becoming a character in its own right, albeit one who remained in the background. The "Colors" theme was going to be a reference to how all the factions pledged allegience to a different color, but Toph didn't even have an understanding of the concept; the chapter was supposed to primarily be from her POV.
6. Stress
It's Sokka and Mai versus a fugitive Long Feng in a fight to the finish! Long Feng escaped Azula's prison and, revealing Iroh's identity as the Dragon of the West, steals the resistance from him and Zuko and Sokka. Azula realizes that with Long Feng's knowledge of the city, he can keep an organized rebellion going forever, so she has the Dai Li start purging the city and conducting witch hunts. When Long Feng is forced to react in the open to save his wealthy supporters, Mai and Ty Lee attack him at the same time, while everyone is surprised to find Iroh and Zuko and Sokka trying to save those same wealthy supporters in an effort to earn their loyalty away from Long Feng. Free for all fight! In the end, Long Feng is defeated when Azula arrives, and Mai comes up with a way to let Iroh, Zuko, and Sokka go free. She's disturbed to realize that it was primarily for Sokka's sake that she did it.
[Commentary]
La dee da. I added the last bit solely to add some Maikka to this idea, but it was awful of me. Mai wouldn't have been that invested at this point, unless I was assuming that they were making some major connections in all the awesome Maikka scenes I wasn't planning out at all.
7. Catch or Dance if you can somehow come up with a way to use it because Catch would be better for #4.
Aang shows up with Katara and uses the Avatar state to whup Azula's butt and free Ba Sing Se. She, Ty Lee, and Mai escape. At the end of the whole story, Sokka advises the gAang to go the Fire Nation ahead of the Invasion, and save who they can among the good, having been shown by Mai that Fire Nationals aren't all bad. Indicate hope that when he reaches the Capital, Mai might switch sides.
[Commentary]
This chapter was meant to be a gag chapter, with Aang showing up and using the Avatar state to fix everything that had happened in the previous chapters. It would be a horrible ending, suitable only for the least serious of farces. No wonder I threw it away. As you can also see, I also wound up throwing away my plans for both Sokka and Mai's character arcs. The only thing I kept was the idea of Azula escaping. As usual, I’m loath to have Sokka solve Aang’s problems for him, so I wanted to have Azula escape. However, Azula would have to escape after Aang arrived, and Aang has full control of the Avatar State at this point. How would she manage it from the middle of Ba Sing Se? This is partially why the final battle of the final version of the fic ended up in a huge lake; Azula could just go underwater to hide from everyone, use her blue fire to rocket away, and come up for air a distance away and swim away. No walls or guards or anything to interfere.
--REVISED PLAN--
[Commentary]
I realized after I wrote out Chapter 3 that my original plans weren't going to work, so I opened up my Notes file again and tried to replan everything. Chapter 4 was already in the process of being written at this point, so I included what I had already done. Personally, I'm proud of myself for realizing that I needed a new map before I wound up in a trainwreck.
4. Catch
Sokka and Zuko break into the palace and rescue the Earth King. Azula gets more paranoid as she loses control of Ba Sing Se. Sokka winds up captured and Azula confronts Mai about what role she's playing in things.
5. Stress
Mai makes excuses to Azula that get her off her back for now, but Azula gets Mai to agree to restrictions in order to prove her innocence. With the Earth King uniting the Resistance movements, at least acting as an icon around which they can all revolve and so work out their own ways of cooperating, and Toph helping out on the Outer Wall, Azula is rapidly losing her window for conquering Ba Sing Se. Plus, it's likely that the Earth King could be sending for his own reinforcements. Azula isn't crazy yet, so she decides to roll with the punches and take a partial victory. She decides to turn Ba Sing Se into a quagmire that will drain Earth Kingdom resources and never be able to support the Invasion. To this end, she releases Long Feng and gives him back the Dai Li, who never actually betrayed him here, kind of sort of. She tells him that it wasn't safe to release him before, and he outwardly accepts this, but doesn't trust the Princess. Which Azula herself is fine with. Meanwhile, Mai gets Ty Lee to help her meet with Sokka, and they have it out.
[Commentary]
I actually stuck to this plan pretty closely, but I'm disturbed by how little Maikka I included here. My subplots are starting to overtake me.
6. Colors
With the Outer Wall secured, Toph moves into the city. The Resistance of Ba Sing Se is more or less organized now, and the riots in the Lower Ring are quelled for now. She goes to Team Avatar's house and finds Zuko and Iroh hiding out there with Jin (and Momo!), in the hopes that the rest of Team Avatar would show up. She learns what happened to Sokka, and immediately wants to rescue him. Iroh agrees, but Zuko takes some convincing. Meanwhile, Azula prepares to leave. She lets "leak" the news about Sokka being transferred as a prisoner, but really plans to draw Zuko out of hiding, offer him a ride home, and get out of there herself.
[Commentary]
Again, I was doing pretty well. I didn't realize my two Buddy Cop Dai Li agents would be the source of the leak until I began writing, but I once that idea came to me, I immediately figured out the full scope of the rest of their plot. The only question left was whether I was going to kill them at the end in a Black Comedy kind of way.
The use of the "Colors" title was still in my plans at this point, although nothing in the summary here indicates that I was still thinking about the actual theme. I'm glad I came up with the idea of the "Concealed Weapon" theme, because it fits things much more closely with all the main movers and shakers preparing traps for each other using secret allies. The scene at the end of the chapter, where Mai strips Sokka and gives him some actual concealed weapons so that he can be her metaphorical concealed weapon, recycled an old idea I had for a Maikka one-shot but never bothered with, wherein Mai outfits Sokka with weapons for a mission of some kind, taking his measurements like a tailor and trying out different kinds of weapon-holders on his body, while Suki watches and seethes at how touchy-feeling the whole thing gets. I prefer the implementation of it in "Trapped in Ba Sing Se," where it's played for comedy yet reflects the way the characters are starting to connect, much better. Jealous girlfriends are trite, anyway.
7. Dance
War! It's the Fire Nation versus the Dai Li versus the Resistance, with Hakoda's fleet knocking on the door! Long Feng has betrayed Azula and is trying to kill both her and all her enemies (Zuko and Team Avatar). Sokka and Mai weather the battle, and then Aang arrives to settle things. Azula is captured, but convinces Zuko to free her? I dunno, I'll figure it out when I get there. Thanks for playing!
[Commentary]
So, this is my first pass at the final chapter, wisely left vague until it was time to be written. As you can see, the only things I’m really banking on are a big battle between everyone, and Zuko going back to the Fire Nation willingly with Azula. Zuko’s journey is a bit all over the place in this story; I seemed at first to be building towards pairing him with Jin and putting him on the Earth Kingdom’s side, then I suddenly switch here and have him rejoin the Fire Nation despite it all. Am I just hewing too close to the canon events? Well, yes and no. One of the themes I was dealing with here was the idea of picking sides, and how people can work together and connect as individuals without actually being on the same side. Zuko works with Sokka throughout the whole story, but goes back to the Fire Nation in the end. Mai comes to be loyal to Sokka, but she doesn’t want to join his team at any point. Sending everyone off to fight for different sides in the end was my way of illustrating that, despite all this, these people still managed to help and care for each other, and it may be possible again in the future, once the war is done. For some reason, I thought this an appropriate exploration for a shipping week fic that should be all about romance.
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OTHER IDEAS
Dai Li as overall villains? When Sokka discovers that Mai is Fire Nation, he has to get over wanting revenge for Yue and Suki. Maybe he can't bring himself to hit a girl?
[Commentary]
The Dai Li were villains, but the rest was never used. Ah well.
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DANCE OUTLINE
[Commentary]
What follows was the full outline I made for the final chapter just before I began writing it. I realized that I had far too many plotlines and character arcs to resolve than I could keep track of in my head while writing, so I wisely took the time to plot out how I would resolve them and in what order. Most of these ideas occurred to me in a general sense before I wrote all this out, but coming up with the sequence before I actually tried writing was a huge help and time-saver. I stuck pretty closely to my plan, changing things only for practical concerns, so I won’t comment on any of it. The only thing interesting left to say is that I revised this plan while I was typing it out, moving events around by cutting and pasting paragraphs.
The arrival of Katara and the Water Tribe fleet especially got moved around a lot. I was originally going to use it as a dramatic rescue, but between Iroh, Toph, Katara, and Aang, I had more dramatic rescues than I had problems to solve, so Katara’s arrival got moved up and actually became something more of a complication in terms of narrative significance. Also up in the air was the number of times Azula and Long Feng betrayed each other. I was originally going to have them comedically keep teaming up at every new complication in their plans, then fighting again as soon as they escaped the threat. The Dai Li were originally even going to bind Zuko and Sokka with their rock-gloves and toss at least Sokka overboard, so that Mai could save him. Instead, I sank Azula’s ship, and everyone but Sokka was in the command tower at the time and so were able to escape some other way.
Starts with Sokka being retrieved from the palace. Azula unchains him, but handcuffs him behind his back and puts the key on a chain around her neck that she slips into her tunic. Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee are taking him to their Fire Nation ship. Nominally, they're departing, but really they're luring Zuko and Iroh out of hiding.
They ride outside the city. As they arrive at the marina on the Western Serpent’s Pass lake that's been co-opted by the Fire Nation, Mai, Sokka, and Ty Lee all trade significant glances and stuff. As they step out of the carriage, Zuko reveals himself and challenges Azula to an Agni Kai! Azula declines, grabs Sokka as a human shield, then orders Mai and Ty Lee to go after Zuko. Iroh comes out of hiding and joins in the battle. He engages Mai, at one point catching one of her blades in his hand, while Ty Lee attacks Zuko. It quickly becomes clear to all participants that everyone is purposefully holding back.
Sokka meanwhile snarks at Azula for being a coward and holding him so closely. That's when Long Feng shows up with his Dai Li. Long Feng directly attacks her with a large force. More agents attack the Firebender escort, Zuko, Mai, Iroh, and Ty, but they all team up to defeat them, exchanging notes while they do so. Zuko tells Ty Lee not to hold back against him. Mai tells Iroh to take Zuko and run, but Iroh refuses, saying that they have to rescue Sokka, too, and asks if she's onboard with that plan.
Azula fights with Long Feng, while holding onto Sokka with one hand, and trades insults with the Dai Li leader. She claims that she suspected he would betray her, but she's disappointed that he couldn't accept a good thing when he had it handed to him. Sokka, getting tired of it all, uses Azula's distraction to spin and knee her in the stomach, then uses Long Feng's surprise to take the opportunity to head-butt him off his feet and kick him in the head a few times. He tries to run away, but Azula recovers and throws enough fire to head him off. Sokka turns around and realizes he's about to face a mad Azula with his hands tied behind his back when The Resistance shows up and launches an attack. Azula, for the first time, realizes that she may be a little outgunned here.
Azula and Long Feng trade glances, and agree to a temporary truce. They both head for the ship, covering each other, pushing Sokka back forth between each other. When they get close enough, Azula sees that Ty Lee is already aboard with Zuko, so she boards with Long Feng and a handful of Dai Li and Firebenders, and orders the ship to put out to sea. Ty Lee is appalled that Mai is being left behind, and Azula has a moment where she really seems to regret it, but she says that they have to get away with Zuko while they can, and can come back for Mai and Iroh later. Then she orders Long Feng and the Dai Li taken captive along with Zuko and Sokka, and without Bendables, they can't resist.
Mai is left trapped with Iroh and most of the Dai Li. With the help of The Resistance, they defeat their opponents, and Mai checks out the situation. She is surprised to be abandoned by Azula, but not really hurt. Iroh tells her that he's will to let her "escape" The Resistance, and asks what she really wants to do.
Meanwhile, Azula's ship is going full speed ahead, and makes plans to rendevouz with the rest of their fleet. But that's when they the Water Tribe fleet comes up on them, having sailed up from Chameleon Bay and crossed over the Serpent's Pass. Both they and the Fire Nation navy will be upon them at the same time. It's going to be a massive navy battle.
Below decks, Firebenders bring all the Dai Li, Zuko, and Sokka below decks, but Zuko lets Sokka now that it's time to make a move if he has one. Sokka uses the key he slipped away from Azula when he attacked her to unhandcuff himself. Zuko reveals that he's not paralyzed at all. They fight off their guards, *and* the Dai Li, but between Zuko's Firebending and the knives Mai gave Sokka, they manage to defeat the whole group.Sokka asks if Zuko was really counting on Ty Lee not to really fight him and Sokka being able to free himself. Zuko says no, it's good that they didn't have to wait for rescue, but there was a contingency plan.
Deeper in the ship, Toph pops out of her hiding place with Jin as her spotter; they had snuck aboard the ship in the night by Toph creating a temporary door in the hull. She wrecks the engine and the ship coasts to a halt.
Sokka and Zuko emerge on the deck to discover that a huge navy battle is going on around them, and their ship has already taken damage from ice projectiles. They find Katara on the Water Tribe flagship, and she's sending giant waves out at the Fire Nation ships. Her wave strikes one ship coming to Azula's ship's defense, and the two Fire Nation ships collide. Azula's ship tips, then the conning tower breaks off at the base and the forces full capsize the ship. Everyone goes overboard, and Sokka is trapped with the sinking tower.
Mai and Iroh arrive in a small pleasure yacht that Iroh is powering with Firebending just in time to see Sokka into the drink. Mai jumps in the water to save him, risking her life to free him from the metal wreckage. When they come up, they find the battle in chaos, people drowning and generally everything is awful and they have to tread water and hope for a rescue. Mai admits that she might have saved Sokka from a quick drowning only for them to be killed in the battle, or drowning when they get exhauseted from treading water.
Then a light flares briefly in the sky, and a human figure ascends from a small cloud that's moving against the wind. An Airbending enhanced voice proclaims, "No more fighting. No one dies today." The seas respond, calming, forming a plane of ice beneath the drowning sailors. The Fire Nation ships are pierced by ice spires, breaking them. The fighting is over.
Jin finds Zuko pushing a life raft off the ice, and asks where he's going. He says that everything in Ba Sing Se, this whole battle, is proof that the Fire Nation has lost its way. He needs to return home to make sure this never happens again, that his father finds out what needs to be fixed. He kisses Jin goodbye, hopes in the liferaft, and uses his Firebending to get it up to speed. He is soon lost to sight.
Azula is swimming away, sure that death by drowning is preferable to being captured by the Avatar. Zuko finds her, and offers her room in his boat. Azula reflects that they're both failures, that she can no longer cast stones and claim to be without sin. Accepting that she misjudged herself and Zuko, she accepts his help and promises to get him back to the Fire Nation. They abscond.
Back at the Marina, there's a big reunion. Iroh is upset that Zuko didn't return, but is at least mollified that he isn't dead. He offers refuge to Mai and Ty Lee, and Mai wonders how long she'll stick with him and where she might go. The gAang has to get ready for the Invasion; while Ba Sing Se is reduced, it can still help, and Iroh pledges to bring his own friends in on the idea. He notes that while the Fire Nation knows that they're coming and have the plans, Iroh knows what the Fire Nation will be expecting, and that can be its own advantage. Sokka also wants to free all the Kyoshi Warriors before the Invasion.
As they prepare to part, Sokka gives Mai and huge hug and gives her a whale-bone knife that he got from the other Water Tribe marriors. Mai snarks about it being part of a dead animal, but accepts it.
In the last scene, Zhuang and Laotao reflect that they're going to have to work for a living now doing honest toil, but they both like that. They had been raised to be Dai Li, but they like the new world of possibilities ahead of them. They resolve to get some custard tarts soon, and ride into the sunset.
Epilogue- a year or two later, single Sokka is in the colonies dealing with the colony issues. He spots Mai, they approach each other all dramatic, and Sokka says, "Hello, lover." Mai snarks at how horrible a line that is, and Sokka points that she didn't object to the title of lover. Mai raises her eyebrows, smiles, and says nothing.
[Commentary]
I only just realized that I moved the whalebone knife exchange from the last chapter to the epilogue. I think it works better there, where it's not solely a symbolic gesture, it's also part of Sokka and Mai's new partnership and shared profession.