*grumble*
Why does my digestive system hate me? Specifically the bowel, really. I mean, c'mon, intestines, why you gotta play it like that? Trapping me in the bathroom for half an hour (yes, I ran in at 9:45, left at 10:10) and harassing my poor abdomen, and I don't even want to think about how sad my ass is right now. The thing that might piss me off the most besides the absolutely wasted time is the hot and cold chills. I don't know how you do it, but somehow you make me feel like I'm in a humid Florida afternoon while my arms are goosebumping and I'm having to shiver to keep warm. Seriously, it's not cool. I know you think you're all that, but I'm really getting tired of your hijinks. Just because you've been pulling this stupidity for over a decade doesn't mean it's acceptable.
In short, you are a jerk. The end.
In short, you are a jerk. The end.