This is where I lose my few remaining LJ friends
Here it is, the beginning of July, and it signals the close of one of the major annual events in the gay community. I speak of none other than the hedonistic display of debauchery known as "Gay Pride."
The whole concept of "gay pride" simply doesn't make sense to me. As I see it, pride comes from something you've actually accomplished through hard work, intelligence, determination, skill, etc. Being gay is simply who I am, and I don't have any control over it one way or another. I don't see how I can have pride in something that's (genetically) been part of me from the day I was born. And I emphasize the word "part" -- being gay isn't what defines me as a person, even though I know others who feel differently about being gay. I don't have any more interest in gay pride than I would have in "brownish hair pride," or "too many zits pride."
I suffer from the unforgivable flaw of being neither "gay-acting" nor "straight-acting." I just act like myself, and that doesn't happen to fall conveniently into someone else's stereotype. Unfortunately, that means I don't fit into the gay world any better than I fit into the straight world -- I'm a misfit in both. Despite my sexuality, I just appear to everyone as a normal, average guy who doesn't show overt signs of sexuality. I think there are probably thousands if not millions of other guys out there like me, who are defined mainly by the fact that we blend into the background wherever we go.
I would never even go near one of those Gay Pride parades. They are to me what a minstrel show would be to a black person -- a total caricature of my sexuality, and who I am as a person. I don't know why any person would want to present himself (and his sexuality) in the context of some freak show. (Obviously I'm referring to the more extreme elements. By contrast, there's a lot to commend in PFLAG members parading in unity.) Yeah, yeah, you're going to tell me that there's a lot more to gay pride events than extreme stuff, and I don't argue with that. But it's the extreme stuff that gets the most publicity, and it's what forms the image of gays in the minds of many people.
More than anything, I just want to be accepted as a normal part of society. Even if I never marry, I want the RIGHT to be married under the same laws, and with the same benefits my taxes pay for, as everyone else. I'm as entitled to that level of equality as any other citizen. I want to live a quiet life where I respect the sexuality of other persons, just as I expect them to respect my own. If I ever decide to have a family -- which is doubtful -- I'd like to teach my children that all people are of equal worth and should be treated with kindness and tolerance. It seems incredible to me that much of society thinks this is all too much to ask. But perhaps part of the reason is the freakish image that the gay community sometimes presents for itself.
The whole concept of "gay pride" simply doesn't make sense to me. As I see it, pride comes from something you've actually accomplished through hard work, intelligence, determination, skill, etc. Being gay is simply who I am, and I don't have any control over it one way or another. I don't see how I can have pride in something that's (genetically) been part of me from the day I was born. And I emphasize the word "part" -- being gay isn't what defines me as a person, even though I know others who feel differently about being gay. I don't have any more interest in gay pride than I would have in "brownish hair pride," or "too many zits pride."
I suffer from the unforgivable flaw of being neither "gay-acting" nor "straight-acting." I just act like myself, and that doesn't happen to fall conveniently into someone else's stereotype. Unfortunately, that means I don't fit into the gay world any better than I fit into the straight world -- I'm a misfit in both. Despite my sexuality, I just appear to everyone as a normal, average guy who doesn't show overt signs of sexuality. I think there are probably thousands if not millions of other guys out there like me, who are defined mainly by the fact that we blend into the background wherever we go.
I would never even go near one of those Gay Pride parades. They are to me what a minstrel show would be to a black person -- a total caricature of my sexuality, and who I am as a person. I don't know why any person would want to present himself (and his sexuality) in the context of some freak show. (Obviously I'm referring to the more extreme elements. By contrast, there's a lot to commend in PFLAG members parading in unity.) Yeah, yeah, you're going to tell me that there's a lot more to gay pride events than extreme stuff, and I don't argue with that. But it's the extreme stuff that gets the most publicity, and it's what forms the image of gays in the minds of many people.
More than anything, I just want to be accepted as a normal part of society. Even if I never marry, I want the RIGHT to be married under the same laws, and with the same benefits my taxes pay for, as everyone else. I'm as entitled to that level of equality as any other citizen. I want to live a quiet life where I respect the sexuality of other persons, just as I expect them to respect my own. If I ever decide to have a family -- which is doubtful -- I'd like to teach my children that all people are of equal worth and should be treated with kindness and tolerance. It seems incredible to me that much of society thinks this is all too much to ask. But perhaps part of the reason is the freakish image that the gay community sometimes presents for itself.