(no subject)
you know how i said things were getting better?
i lied.
i thought they were, but they really weren't.
i dont really feel like explaining it either. all i can say is.....i'm not okay (i promise).
last night when ryan was over i fell asleep for 2 hours and i felt terrible about it. i woke up at 1:40 and he was gone, because hes supposed to leave at 1:30. when i called him, i felt terrible. i think i'm going to start taking speed to stay awake....or something.
i said it was like the time i fell asleep for 5 hours, but he said that was way worse. ((for other reasons)). in any case, i felt really bad.
i'm just in a really bad place right now, and theres not a single thing i can do about it.
i lied.
i thought they were, but they really weren't.
i dont really feel like explaining it either. all i can say is.....i'm not okay (i promise).
last night when ryan was over i fell asleep for 2 hours and i felt terrible about it. i woke up at 1:40 and he was gone, because hes supposed to leave at 1:30. when i called him, i felt terrible. i think i'm going to start taking speed to stay awake....or something.
i said it was like the time i fell asleep for 5 hours, but he said that was way worse. ((for other reasons)). in any case, i felt really bad.
i'm just in a really bad place right now, and theres not a single thing i can do about it.