It's whatever you make it it be.
LAST NIGHT. Bri spent the night at my house. Last night was good up until about 3 in the morning. Everyone knows I drink a lot. so we drank. She's a real light weight I already knew that. I drank more than I should have gradually thought the night. We started drinking at like 130.
But at 3 we were in my room she was supposed to cuddle with me until I fell asleep. But instead she ..
She scared the shit out of me.
I barley even know how to explain this.
I had sex with her twice that probably caused it. I tore her/broke her cherry. I'm not sure. But there was blood on my hands.
Ya. and she began to say things that upset me. "I scared I am going to cheat on you. that sort of stuff". She started to thrash against my hold. And I held her tighter as it got progressively worse. I just held her.
Then I told her to get away from me. She had hurt me. She hit me so hard so many times. And she fell off the bed. We were both crying really bad by this time. And I got down off the bed and held her a little bit more. Then I got myself on the bed and she was hitting the bed.
She had gotten pissed off. And she went to my brothers room smoked a cigg.
so I got more to drink. like a half glass of vodka. And went in there lit up a cigg. And I was drinking right in front of her. She knew I had had enough. She tried to take it away from me. I wouldn't let her. She was still really pissed off. After that I just went in my room and passed out. I don't remember anything beyond there.
This morning all she does is apologize. It hurts really bad not what she did to my body, but the pain I feel because of what happened. I continue to say that it is okay. And she knows I'm lying. I know I'm lying. It's not okay. It couldn't be okay. I have a bruise on my leg it's big. My whole body is sore. I'm sooo glad I don't mark easily.
But ya. That was my night. And I don't really know how to think about it.
But at 3 we were in my room she was supposed to cuddle with me until I fell asleep. But instead she ..
She scared the shit out of me.
I barley even know how to explain this.
I had sex with her twice that probably caused it. I tore her/broke her cherry. I'm not sure. But there was blood on my hands.
Ya. and she began to say things that upset me. "I scared I am going to cheat on you. that sort of stuff". She started to thrash against my hold. And I held her tighter as it got progressively worse. I just held her.
Then I told her to get away from me. She had hurt me. She hit me so hard so many times. And she fell off the bed. We were both crying really bad by this time. And I got down off the bed and held her a little bit more. Then I got myself on the bed and she was hitting the bed.
She had gotten pissed off. And she went to my brothers room smoked a cigg.
so I got more to drink. like a half glass of vodka. And went in there lit up a cigg. And I was drinking right in front of her. She knew I had had enough. She tried to take it away from me. I wouldn't let her. She was still really pissed off. After that I just went in my room and passed out. I don't remember anything beyond there.
This morning all she does is apologize. It hurts really bad not what she did to my body, but the pain I feel because of what happened. I continue to say that it is okay. And she knows I'm lying. I know I'm lying. It's not okay. It couldn't be okay. I have a bruise on my leg it's big. My whole body is sore. I'm sooo glad I don't mark easily.
But ya. That was my night. And I don't really know how to think about it.