pressure builds
So haven't posted for awhile....too busy. Which has been nice. Good weekdays and crazy weekends, Its felt good to finally find myself again.
Had my subaru stolen last tuesday night/wendsday morning....awesome. Ended up getting it back friday when I sold the cobra. Debating what to do with the money. Want a 2007 legacy gt but also want to take advantage of nothing holding me down and travel somewhere....wont really get another chance.
Katie got home yesterday. I missed her a lot, wanted to say so but she seemed pretty content to just chat and tell me how it was. Talked to me about bleu hooking up and them out till 5:30 in the morning dancing and whatnot. I'm sure she hooked up too but whatever, she's single I guess. Not my place to be mad about that. Wanted to give her a huge hug tho so badly but alas.....
She did say she followed me a bit on FB and was happy I was going out and about.
I dont know...this whole thing is black and white to me. Either we are togeather or we aren't. This morning it's like she was almost dissapointed I haven't given her a hug or whatever. I can't, it hurts too much still, I want to take her out to dinner and do these things with her but....I can't. I can't do that knowing that she's done with the whole relationship. If it's done I'd rather cut my losses and not talk to her at all. She knows (should know) that she's the one I wanna be with but if I can't be then I'm out too, hard to be friends with ex's.
I just hate that she met me when she did. Met me after cari basically fucked me up, the crap with my mom, and these stupid jobs that have taken their toll on me. She knows I'm not the person she fell in love with. Unfortunatly It took to long for him to come back. I just glad he finally did
Had my subaru stolen last tuesday night/wendsday morning....awesome. Ended up getting it back friday when I sold the cobra. Debating what to do with the money. Want a 2007 legacy gt but also want to take advantage of nothing holding me down and travel somewhere....wont really get another chance.
Katie got home yesterday. I missed her a lot, wanted to say so but she seemed pretty content to just chat and tell me how it was. Talked to me about bleu hooking up and them out till 5:30 in the morning dancing and whatnot. I'm sure she hooked up too but whatever, she's single I guess. Not my place to be mad about that. Wanted to give her a huge hug tho so badly but alas.....
She did say she followed me a bit on FB and was happy I was going out and about.
I dont know...this whole thing is black and white to me. Either we are togeather or we aren't. This morning it's like she was almost dissapointed I haven't given her a hug or whatever. I can't, it hurts too much still, I want to take her out to dinner and do these things with her but....I can't. I can't do that knowing that she's done with the whole relationship. If it's done I'd rather cut my losses and not talk to her at all. She knows (should know) that she's the one I wanna be with but if I can't be then I'm out too, hard to be friends with ex's.
I just hate that she met me when she did. Met me after cari basically fucked me up, the crap with my mom, and these stupid jobs that have taken their toll on me. She knows I'm not the person she fell in love with. Unfortunatly It took to long for him to come back. I just glad he finally did