Hmm...
Well, thankfully it doesn't seem as though many people actually read this journal. It's getting to be more of a daily diary and less a . . . worthwhile contemplation on life (was it ever? I doubt it). But I've decided that since it's rather vapid by intellectual standards (i.e. I don't write about saving the rainforest, or why I support the death penalty, or the merits of Kurt Vonnegut's literature) I'd rather not trouble any poor unsuspecting soul who happens to stumble upon it and subsequently read it without knowing better. However, I do remember Aesop's fable about the gnat on the shoulder of the bull (and it's many variations . . . a quick version here) so if you didn't even notice me in the first place you can disregard this entry. If for some reason you HAVE been noticing and aren't on my friends list, I will add you if you ask :)
In other developments, Kendra has decided to study for her Economics exam starting today! A day early! Yes, shocking. However, due to a poor sleep pattern I've also decided to decline the visit to the computer science TAs for today. Tomorrow, perhaps (or rather I hope most definitely). I will however do the koofers I have printed out (thank you, thank you, thank you Will) and read the project specs and maybe even 'start' on it. :)
I'm really questioning why I'm here lately. I'm feeling terribly unsure . . . but you know, at the same time I can't help but believe that time is fixed to an extent. The future is now, in a very real sense, and just because my brain can't conceive of it doesn't make it any less true. I wish I could extrapolate to two years from now and see what I'll be doing and make my decision now - it would save so much pain. All of life is an opportunity cost indeed my friend . . . I fight the urge to call on God for strength because I don't deserve it. I can only wish or hope for the courage to be myself and go completely nuts if the need arises. What I want is terribly obvious, but I can't seem to break free of the values and bonds that parents, other family, friends, teachers, and even society as a whole imposed on me my entire life in order to get at it.
Of course I could save myself a lot of hot air and just wait for a miracle. :B
Sometimes I feel
That you're a part of me
Although it don't seem real
It's how I want it to be
But if you can't stay then I'll understand
You're just sawdust in my empty hand
If you can't decide
I'll still be true
Just open wide
I'm here for you
And if you think that you've found
A gentle sound
Where love breaks down
It's all right.
And if you can't overcome
What gets you down
Don't get uptight
It's all right.
I'm a shallow man
In an hollow land
On a beaten track under your command
And the sound
In my head goes round and round
Like a drunk on the stairs
who just fell down
But now it seems
Like a distant dream
When it all lived wrong
With our love supreme
And the sound in my head goes round and round
Like a drunk on the stairs who just fell down
And if you think that you've found
A gentle sound
Where love breaks down
It's all right.
And if you can't overcome
What gets you down
Don't get uptight
It's all right.
In other developments, Kendra has decided to study for her Economics exam starting today! A day early! Yes, shocking. However, due to a poor sleep pattern I've also decided to decline the visit to the computer science TAs for today. Tomorrow, perhaps (or rather I hope most definitely). I will however do the koofers I have printed out (thank you, thank you, thank you Will) and read the project specs and maybe even 'start' on it. :)
I'm really questioning why I'm here lately. I'm feeling terribly unsure . . . but you know, at the same time I can't help but believe that time is fixed to an extent. The future is now, in a very real sense, and just because my brain can't conceive of it doesn't make it any less true. I wish I could extrapolate to two years from now and see what I'll be doing and make my decision now - it would save so much pain. All of life is an opportunity cost indeed my friend . . . I fight the urge to call on God for strength because I don't deserve it. I can only wish or hope for the courage to be myself and go completely nuts if the need arises. What I want is terribly obvious, but I can't seem to break free of the values and bonds that parents, other family, friends, teachers, and even society as a whole imposed on me my entire life in order to get at it.
Of course I could save myself a lot of hot air and just wait for a miracle. :B
Sometimes I feel
That you're a part of me
Although it don't seem real
It's how I want it to be
But if you can't stay then I'll understand
You're just sawdust in my empty hand
If you can't decide
I'll still be true
Just open wide
I'm here for you
And if you think that you've found
A gentle sound
Where love breaks down
It's all right.
And if you can't overcome
What gets you down
Don't get uptight
It's all right.
I'm a shallow man
In an hollow land
On a beaten track under your command
And the sound
In my head goes round and round
Like a drunk on the stairs
who just fell down
But now it seems
Like a distant dream
When it all lived wrong
With our love supreme
And the sound in my head goes round and round
Like a drunk on the stairs who just fell down
And if you think that you've found
A gentle sound
Where love breaks down
It's all right.
And if you can't overcome
What gets you down
Don't get uptight
It's all right.