Boola Boola
Here we go again folks for day two.
Start Feed(11/22/2005, 7:09:48 PM)
{
We'll start as always with the old energy meter. Puts all the content that will follow in context:
OFFICIAL ENERgY METER:
<(••••••()•••••••••••••)>
Passing out -------------------- 4 Dean's Beans, an Expresso, and 13 hours of sleep
Today is Schrute day because the Office, 9:30 PM on NBC, is on tonight. Leading cast member and assistant to the regional manager, Dwight Schrute, could not comment because he was out getting drunk with his laser tag team.
His name is RAINN?!?! Pshh, what's his brother's name? Mudslidee?
Today's Headline that can never lead to any good:
"Dirty Bomb" Jose Padilla indicted. "Dirty Sanchez" still on the loose.
Three Songs in No particular Order:
1. Rock and Roll Hoochie Koo - As sung by Edgar Winter
2. White Wedding - Billy Idol
3. Aqualung - Jethro Tull
Thumbs up to:
He showed me that The Incredible Hulk was just make-believe. Lou Farrigno wasn't going to hurt me at all.
Thumbs down to:
This sonofabitch has been spreading lies for almost a quarter of a century.
Official MEH goes to:
You know how you can sometimes see little floating things in the sunlight that comes from a window? This is why. It's called the "spring-a-ling" XPP3985023. I don't even know why the scientists make them.
Who's having the best day of his life?
Ben "indian red" Carcone - Born of humble origin in the town of Livonia, he is twice divorced and lives with a cat behind the Bates.
Why?: Welp, I don't know, I just wanted to put indian red in his name. He's probably having a pretty lousy day.
Who's the worst man alive today?
Axel Shlitty - Congealed of humble origin in the town of Shlitty, Alaska, he is happily married with 2 kids, Kitty and Lawrence.
Why?: Axel Shlitty was once king of the mountain in 3rd grade, throwing all of the kids off the giant snow mountain behind the playground. In 4th grade, he threw a snowball at one of his classmates, missing them but ready to try again. He was promptly reprimanded by the authorities and wasn't permitted outside during recess for the duration of the school year. Vowing revenge he decided to start tying clothes hangers together and inadvertently invented the heart attack.
Isn't that right, Joe?
Joe: Leave me out of this, I am in a pickle. My wife recently beat me to the mail box and got one of my discreetly packaged boxes. She opened it and found 3 gay porn videos. I thought quick and said I was going to surprise her with them and we could learn from them, but I ordered straight videos. I pretended to be irate and disgusted at the company's mistake. She bought my act, but wasn't pleased with the idea of watching any porn.
THIS JUST IN!
Rainn Wilson is a member of the Baha'i Faith.
In Other news:
Throwing computers at police just makes them mad.
You Know What Really Grinds My Gears:
You know what really grinds my gears? Door knobs. Why is the grocery store 20 years ahead of every other door on the planet except for best buy, and the hardware store. All doors should be automatic. Comon folks its the 2000's and I'm in no mood to be opening all these doors. Star Trek has sliders so let's go comon chop chop. While we are at it, I want a electromagnetic suit for every time I go to the grocery store, which is never. This way, I don't even have to touch the cart. If the polarity is in one direction, it will push the cart forward for me, and if i reverse the polarity, the car will zoom toward me at high speeds. You won't be able to turn the carts so you better make sure you get everything you need from one aisle. I recommend the aisle with all the coloring books because no one ever wants to go down that aisle. It smells of literature. I should be riding around in a shoe right now. Mario could do it, and I could ride around in shoes in monopoly. I bought houses on St. James Place while riding in a shoe, and NO ONE could get mad about it. Anyway, the magnets would increase cart collision 245%, and the laughs would increase 10%. Whatever happened to hats, remember in the 50's? Better not leave without my hat because I'm an important man in my electromagnetic suit of armor. Make the suit strong enough and it could rip doors right off their hinges. THAT'LL GET THEM OPEN. I don't even think we need doors. A stack of papers would do just fine. And that's what grinds my gears.
FACEOFF
Today's Contenders are:
The name Florine VS. the name Agnes
Round 1:
Florine: Chemical Element -
Agnes: Has the abbreviation for the Nintendo Entertainment System in it +
Florine -1 Agnes 1
Round 2:
Florine: The head of Weight Watchers has this name
Agnes: Stupid Simpson's character -
Florine -1 Agnes 0
Round 3 FINAL:
Florine: My great grandmother who had Alzheimer's but remembered me until she died +
Agnes: Agnes Moorehead played Endora on Bewitched and not Uncle Arthur -
Florine 0 Agnes -1
Conclusion
Florine had a rough start but dominates Agnes in the end. I want to know why people don't name their kids 1920's names anymore, such as Gertrude, Beatrice, Lilly, Esther, Pauline, Humphrey, Oscar, Harold, Seymour, or Maximillion. You should always name your son Maximillion because they will have a million dollars for just being born.
;CASE CLOSED;
Click this Link and Stink
Link:
http://newgrounds.com/portal/view/274073
(Depressed Kids)
Stink:
http://itgoesthere.ytmnd.com/
(Depressed Kids)
The Goodnights
I'd like to thank Joseph Gladstone for inventing the catch phrase, the cast and crew, and viewer's like you and don't forget the moral of the story, if you fail to plan...you plan to fail, It'll be the same everyday, wanna fight about it?
Do you know what I'm saying?
I think you do...
Good Night and God Bless Livonia
}
End Feed(11/22/2005, 7:57:36 PM)
Start Feed(11/22/2005, 7:09:48 PM)
{
We'll start as always with the old energy meter. Puts all the content that will follow in context:
OFFICIAL ENERgY METER:
<(••••••()•••••••••••••)>
Passing out -------------------- 4 Dean's Beans, an Expresso, and 13 hours of sleep
Today is Schrute day because the Office, 9:30 PM on NBC, is on tonight. Leading cast member and assistant to the regional manager, Dwight Schrute, could not comment because he was out getting drunk with his laser tag team.
His name is RAINN?!?! Pshh, what's his brother's name? Mudslidee?
Today's Headline that can never lead to any good:
"Dirty Bomb" Jose Padilla indicted. "Dirty Sanchez" still on the loose.
Three Songs in No particular Order:
1. Rock and Roll Hoochie Koo - As sung by Edgar Winter
2. White Wedding - Billy Idol
3. Aqualung - Jethro Tull
Thumbs up to:
He showed me that The Incredible Hulk was just make-believe. Lou Farrigno wasn't going to hurt me at all.
Thumbs down to:
This sonofabitch has been spreading lies for almost a quarter of a century.
Official MEH goes to:
You know how you can sometimes see little floating things in the sunlight that comes from a window? This is why. It's called the "spring-a-ling" XPP3985023. I don't even know why the scientists make them.
Who's having the best day of his life?
Ben "indian red" Carcone - Born of humble origin in the town of Livonia, he is twice divorced and lives with a cat behind the Bates.
Why?: Welp, I don't know, I just wanted to put indian red in his name. He's probably having a pretty lousy day.
Who's the worst man alive today?
Axel Shlitty - Congealed of humble origin in the town of Shlitty, Alaska, he is happily married with 2 kids, Kitty and Lawrence.
Why?: Axel Shlitty was once king of the mountain in 3rd grade, throwing all of the kids off the giant snow mountain behind the playground. In 4th grade, he threw a snowball at one of his classmates, missing them but ready to try again. He was promptly reprimanded by the authorities and wasn't permitted outside during recess for the duration of the school year. Vowing revenge he decided to start tying clothes hangers together and inadvertently invented the heart attack.
Isn't that right, Joe?
Joe: Leave me out of this, I am in a pickle. My wife recently beat me to the mail box and got one of my discreetly packaged boxes. She opened it and found 3 gay porn videos. I thought quick and said I was going to surprise her with them and we could learn from them, but I ordered straight videos. I pretended to be irate and disgusted at the company's mistake. She bought my act, but wasn't pleased with the idea of watching any porn.
THIS JUST IN!
Rainn Wilson is a member of the Baha'i Faith.
In Other news:
Throwing computers at police just makes them mad.
You Know What Really Grinds My Gears:
You know what really grinds my gears? Door knobs. Why is the grocery store 20 years ahead of every other door on the planet except for best buy, and the hardware store. All doors should be automatic. Comon folks its the 2000's and I'm in no mood to be opening all these doors. Star Trek has sliders so let's go comon chop chop. While we are at it, I want a electromagnetic suit for every time I go to the grocery store, which is never. This way, I don't even have to touch the cart. If the polarity is in one direction, it will push the cart forward for me, and if i reverse the polarity, the car will zoom toward me at high speeds. You won't be able to turn the carts so you better make sure you get everything you need from one aisle. I recommend the aisle with all the coloring books because no one ever wants to go down that aisle. It smells of literature. I should be riding around in a shoe right now. Mario could do it, and I could ride around in shoes in monopoly. I bought houses on St. James Place while riding in a shoe, and NO ONE could get mad about it. Anyway, the magnets would increase cart collision 245%, and the laughs would increase 10%. Whatever happened to hats, remember in the 50's? Better not leave without my hat because I'm an important man in my electromagnetic suit of armor. Make the suit strong enough and it could rip doors right off their hinges. THAT'LL GET THEM OPEN. I don't even think we need doors. A stack of papers would do just fine. And that's what grinds my gears.
FACEOFF
Today's Contenders are:
The name Florine VS. the name Agnes
Round 1:
Florine: Chemical Element -
Agnes: Has the abbreviation for the Nintendo Entertainment System in it +
Florine -1 Agnes 1
Round 2:
Florine: The head of Weight Watchers has this name
Agnes: Stupid Simpson's character -
Florine -1 Agnes 0
Round 3 FINAL:
Florine: My great grandmother who had Alzheimer's but remembered me until she died +
Agnes: Agnes Moorehead played Endora on Bewitched and not Uncle Arthur -
Florine 0 Agnes -1
Conclusion
Florine had a rough start but dominates Agnes in the end. I want to know why people don't name their kids 1920's names anymore, such as Gertrude, Beatrice, Lilly, Esther, Pauline, Humphrey, Oscar, Harold, Seymour, or Maximillion. You should always name your son Maximillion because they will have a million dollars for just being born.
;CASE CLOSED;
Click this Link and Stink
Link:
http://newgrounds.com/portal/view/274073
(Depressed Kids)
Stink:
http://itgoesthere.ytmnd.com/
(Depressed Kids)
The Goodnights
I'd like to thank Joseph Gladstone for inventing the catch phrase, the cast and crew, and viewer's like you and don't forget the moral of the story, if you fail to plan...you plan to fail, It'll be the same everyday, wanna fight about it?
Do you know what I'm saying?
I think you do...
Good Night and God Bless Livonia
}
End Feed(11/22/2005, 7:57:36 PM)