The end of myself...take me there.

Aug 29, 2007 01:51

JESUS CHRIST HE DIED FOR YOU!!!

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callous much? anonymous February 9 2008, 02:13:50 UTC
I don't know if you even check this thing anymore, but I couldn't find you on facebook. I wanted to apologize for being so callous in my last couple of posts (see above) and for throwing a pity party. I can see now how bitter and hurt I was, and I'm embarrassed of my words.

I have had to learn the hard way - I have been broken in the last couple of months beyond where I thought I could be broken, and while I am nowhere near being made whole, I am learning and growing. Jesus Christ my Lord and Savior has proven to me beyond the shadow of a doubt that I am nothing without Him, and that my only shot at any form of fulfillment is through clinging to Him for dear life. Healing is a long, slow, excruciatingly painful process, but no matter how alone I feel, I know I have rediscovered and will never lose sight of an eternal Love - and that gives me strength to take on another day.

All that to say I am so sorry for treating you as I did and for being so adamantly hard-hearted. Thank you so so so much for your prayers; there have been several people revealed to me that had/have been watching over me with their prayers, and I cannot express in words how grateful I am for each one. Your simple faith and ardent prayers are partly responsible for helping me turn around, and I want to thank you for them.

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Re: callous much? lonestarguard May 24 2008, 14:51:47 UTC
I was praying last night for you, and God was like check livejournal, it had to be like a 45 second prayer. Then I was like I am going to bed and I dont have internet here but I will do it in the morning when I walk down to the castle.

I responded to you message on Mysapce but this one is alot better detailed and explains a lot more. I dont know if you remember but I can remember you saying that you couldn't hear God. I really hope thats changed and there are people in your life who can speak into yours when your ears possibly get stopped up as all of ours sometimes do. Coming to the understanding that no matter whose in ours lives or what we find to entertain us, there will never be a replacement for the love that God has for you all of us. I hope that you always remember how much God loves you and its my prayer that you are continually finding your self in the middle of His love. I dont know whats happened in your life or what God did to let you hear "Melanie, this is you Father and I will always love you", but I am glad that you have, truly glad.

I can apologize to for being a jerk and not being a caring, encouraging, god chasing boyfriend. I completely let you down and compromised, for that I am sorry. I hope that you make the most of your time at OSU and remember this advice: The reason we were created was for relationship with God. He wants to know you and hope fully we want to know Him. Prayer, its the best way to talk to Him and there are numerous ways to pray. Reading the Bible, its always been told to us but how often do we actually take time and really read form it and let the Spirit of God teach it to us. Its crazy/ fun/ amazing to have the Spirit of the Lord reveal a passage to us.

I dont say any of this to except that you take it and become encouraged and challenged to go deeper in your relationship with Him.

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