(no subject)
i have decided that i give up. i give up completely on the opposite sex and any kind of relationship. tonight clenched that for me. men are such ass holes that i can't even begin to describe it. i don't even want to go into what happened at the gas station. but it's like, i can't even bring myself into being attracted to people anymore or feeling any slight attachment to them. everyone's just there. i've had the guy from sewickley's phone number sitting on my desk for almost a month now, and i've only had the urge to call it once. i decided that it wasn't worth the hassal. i don't feel alone, i don't feel emptiness, i just feel...nothing. nothing at all. and i like it that way. i don't feel any obligations except those to myself. i don't have to worry about ever having to explain myself or worry about making time for anyone, it's just peaceful and i enjoy it. i have my own life, do what i want, and include people when i feel the need to. basically, it's a freedom i've come to appreciate and i finally realized that tonight. i'm glad that i don't rely on another person to make me feel complete. men suck. that's all i can say. men suck ASS