Akward fucking night in hell!!!!
Okay so tonight i went to my
friends' graduation....that wasnt so bad i got throught that with no
problems accually sat there with my good friend (whos moving to
oakville yeah!!! still havent gotten over that) who we will name nakari
and his girlfrind dena (for their privacy). anyways we sat there and
talked trough the whole thing, and at the end everyone decided they
were going to the moose so i decide what the hell there was no one
there i coouldnt deal with....untill we get a call from nakaris 2
friends that they would like to join us so we drop off the load we had
(dena and the others) to meet with the second car and me and nakari go
for a drive to pick them up. this was great we talked the entire way
which ment that we got more talking in then expected, so y am i now
unhappy.... one of these friends *well name defran* has claimed him
self my arch enemy since i dumped his brother(not really his buisness
and he never talk to either of us to find out y we broke up but
listened to the rumers) so yes then i get uncomfortable. so we get back
to the moose and im there with the entire holy 7 minus one plus my
kinda best friend *well name her pasha*, the other of nakaris friends
*well call rahl* and 4 others... and boy i feel right akward. the holy
7 has mostly dipersed and im no longer friend with many but trying to
change that, so it was terrible and now i feel like not trying to even
change waht was lost, cause tonight gave me no hope i feel like i want
to shred to prices or become invisable, and so one i use to think of as
an older brother (and maybe still) *well call him nathan* and is part
of the holy seven drove me home as we listened to an old cd fromt he oh
so great road trips to who knows where with thte holy seven and as
always i get shot gun and droped off last it was kinda dejavo and now
im home thinking i never want to do that again...ever...but i know i
will for nakari and those i still an close to but not with everyone at
once thats for sure....okay lots of ramdom rambling i know and most of
it isnt understandable but i need to vent going to bed now goodnightand
maybe ill post a more understandable journal soon.