i fucking hate myself.
Well i thought today couldn't get much worse, but knowing that it did i don't give a fuck what happens to me anymore. I woke up this morning by fucking screaming kids, i hate them they are a bunch of inconsiderate assholee. Then i got on the computer of course and sat at staired at the screen waiting for scott to come online. Oh no, but then his fuckin ex girlfriend had to IM me, i hate that bitch she could get ran over for all i fuckin care. And she all was talking shit, so i got pissed and depressed because i know gillis likes her so much more then he will ever like me. i fucking hate knowing he means everything to me and i mean so little to him. It drives me more fucking insaine then i already fucking am. Oh then i just blew up, oh yeah people are gonna love this one. I CUT, its been fucking 3 months and i deside to cut over stupid reasons, go fucking me. I'll draw pictures in paint after im done typing to show you what the fuck it looks like. All i know it still is bleeding from 11 t his morning. i fuckin hate myself, i wish i would die. So my dad im's me a few mins ago..right? I thought i'd be nice to talk to him. Then he comes out with this fucking thing that makes me feel like shit, and i really wanna die now. So my dad says "i have diabetes, and my blood pressure is up to 600, the normal is 60." i say "..then why arnt you at the doctors?! HELLO?!" he says "oh im waiting until monday, but if it gets wrose im just gonna call the abulence" WTF, seriously i hat ehim so much sometimes. its like he wants to die and leave me alone in thsi fucking world. SOmetimes the only person i think cares doesnt care about me any fucking more. If he dies, oh if he dies say goodbye to me too. I fuckin swear if he goes into a coma/dies/or gets hurt really bad.. im gone forever. I could give two shits what you feel like. Also, my cuts on my arms are getting wrose tonight, im going to make them deeper. HAVE A FUCKING FANTASTIC FUCKING DAY, I FUCKING HATE MY LIFE.
