crumbling in
Why is it that on nights when I have breakdowns like this and as bad as this, the only person I want to run to, talk to, see, is you? Especially when the main reason for the breakdown is you. Allbeit indirectly, I guess. I wish I was dead tonight. Fuck I sobbed like a child today in your house, holding our dogs. I think im finally starting to unravel. I broke someones heart because I dont know how to love anyone other than you. I may never have you back in my life again, which kills me. A day may come where I'll never see the pups again. I know you still love me deep down, but it kills me when you say "you can see us together in the future." All that really means is that Im not good enough for you right now. Im sorry. I wish I could change everything and treat you the way he does. I hope you have the best life possible. You deserve nothing but the best. I just wish I could have been the best. I love you