(no subject)
So my best friend and the girl i'm totally in love with (not two people by the way, just one person. hope that makes sense), no longer wants any contact with me. After two weeks of me trying to call her to find out why she was pissed at me, she finally decides to send me an email on my birthday. she didnt want to email me, apparently she would have rather have told me.
maybe i'll post her email here. although it really doesnt make me seem like a nice person, although some of the stuff she said makes it sound like she doesnt really understand me. we've been through a lot and now i feel as if 2 1/2 years have just been thrown away.
at one point in my life i once got rid of all my friends, and im not talking about losing contact with people from high school or unviversity. i mean actually saying our friendship is over. now i cant believe it's actually happening again. my currently bout of depression (i'm depressed a lot of the time, but at this point in time it's of great medical severity) has probably made the people at work, or at least one person that I know of make me look like a rude arrogannt jerk. not tp mention the only thing that is getting me through this whole ordeal is the fact that i have again brought out the razorblades. coincidentally, the reason i stopped using them as much as i did is because this person, my best friend, had come into my life.
there are so many things i wanted to tell her because she made me mad or angry and i never did because i never wanted to hurt her
and to think this all probably started when i sent her an SMS the day after she stayed the night her, when i told her that i missed her
maybe i'll post her email here. although it really doesnt make me seem like a nice person, although some of the stuff she said makes it sound like she doesnt really understand me. we've been through a lot and now i feel as if 2 1/2 years have just been thrown away.
at one point in my life i once got rid of all my friends, and im not talking about losing contact with people from high school or unviversity. i mean actually saying our friendship is over. now i cant believe it's actually happening again. my currently bout of depression (i'm depressed a lot of the time, but at this point in time it's of great medical severity) has probably made the people at work, or at least one person that I know of make me look like a rude arrogannt jerk. not tp mention the only thing that is getting me through this whole ordeal is the fact that i have again brought out the razorblades. coincidentally, the reason i stopped using them as much as i did is because this person, my best friend, had come into my life.
there are so many things i wanted to tell her because she made me mad or angry and i never did because i never wanted to hurt her
and to think this all probably started when i sent her an SMS the day after she stayed the night her, when i told her that i missed her