Addiction
I have found a new addiction. Or perhaps, I should say, it found me.
No, it's not what you're thinking. It's not World of Warcraft...although that is an addiction as well.
It's honey roasted peanuts.
I'll just wait and let that sink in a little.
The first step to solving a problem is admitting it, right? I admit that I have a problem.
It all started one day when I had this sudden inexplicable craving for something crunchy, sweet, yet a bit salty. Honey roasted peanuts for the freaking win.
So I walked to a nearby store...and lo and behold they had a can of honey roasted peanuts. And they were gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood.
It hooks you in like crack cocaine. You pop one into your mouth and there are a few seconds of sweet bliss. Then you can feel the sensation fade from your mouth, so you pop another in.
This can go on for hours if you're not careful.
Of course, this salty sweet goodness makes ones throat drier than the gobi desert. I don't even know what the fuck gobi is. Is that a mini-goblin? I just remember hearing it one time on CNN. Anyways, it makes you fuckin thirsty.
Water goes well with everything, right? WRONG. It dilutes the fantastic taste of honey roasted goodness, so water is totally right out.
Beer kinda works, but it depends on what beer it is. If it's draft beer then you're golden. If it's any other type of beer...the bitterness is at constant war with the sensational taste of honey roasted peanuts, and it really becomes a terrible struggle with your taste buds. Much more stress than it's worth, really.
The answer is milk. Ho-ly-freaking-god milk goes well with honey roasted peanuts. It is the answer to everything. It is almost better than sex. No wait, scratch that. Sex is way better, what the hell am I thinking? See, I told you those peanuts go to your head. It's almost scary.
Sometimes it gets so uncontrollable that I start pouring peanuts in my mouth, then I crunch them, and then take a gulp of milk to wash it down. I am in heaven. I also probably look like a fat ass. But you don't need to know that now, do you? No...no you don't. >_>
I love you, honey roasted peanuts. Almost, but not quite as much as I love that one special person in my life(you know who you are). But don't feel bad. You can be my mistress. It'll be our secret. Shhhhhh.
No, it's not what you're thinking. It's not World of Warcraft...although that is an addiction as well.
It's honey roasted peanuts.
I'll just wait and let that sink in a little.
The first step to solving a problem is admitting it, right? I admit that I have a problem.
It all started one day when I had this sudden inexplicable craving for something crunchy, sweet, yet a bit salty. Honey roasted peanuts for the freaking win.
So I walked to a nearby store...and lo and behold they had a can of honey roasted peanuts. And they were gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood.
It hooks you in like crack cocaine. You pop one into your mouth and there are a few seconds of sweet bliss. Then you can feel the sensation fade from your mouth, so you pop another in.
This can go on for hours if you're not careful.
Of course, this salty sweet goodness makes ones throat drier than the gobi desert. I don't even know what the fuck gobi is. Is that a mini-goblin? I just remember hearing it one time on CNN. Anyways, it makes you fuckin thirsty.
Water goes well with everything, right? WRONG. It dilutes the fantastic taste of honey roasted goodness, so water is totally right out.
Beer kinda works, but it depends on what beer it is. If it's draft beer then you're golden. If it's any other type of beer...the bitterness is at constant war with the sensational taste of honey roasted peanuts, and it really becomes a terrible struggle with your taste buds. Much more stress than it's worth, really.
The answer is milk. Ho-ly-freaking-god milk goes well with honey roasted peanuts. It is the answer to everything. It is almost better than sex. No wait, scratch that. Sex is way better, what the hell am I thinking? See, I told you those peanuts go to your head. It's almost scary.
Sometimes it gets so uncontrollable that I start pouring peanuts in my mouth, then I crunch them, and then take a gulp of milk to wash it down. I am in heaven. I also probably look like a fat ass. But you don't need to know that now, do you? No...no you don't. >_>
I love you, honey roasted peanuts. Almost, but not quite as much as I love that one special person in my life(you know who you are). But don't feel bad. You can be my mistress. It'll be our secret. Shhhhhh.