from cty, to the world. this is the place to be...sexually repressed. no, no, no.
I'm currently at CTY, and I should be reading tomorrow's assignment; however, Mallika, Kiersten and I finished our joint presentation on Adam Smith, Voltaire and Friedrich Engels today, so we're slacking off for a change. Yay! Anyway, because I've got all this time to kill, I'm going to write up a list: What CTY is Really All About. (Love! *and allie kills herself for being hopelessly cheesy*)
CTY IS ABOUT...
-- Getting heart-attack-inducingly excited over Duct Tape Appreciation!
-- Calling everybody on your hall, "Bitch!" and following every bitch with a, "You know I love you...bitch."
-- Mating goldfish; eating mating goldfish; eating virgin goldfish; mating chocolate chip cookies and then eating them, because orgasming and orgasmic sound the same, dammit!
-- Following every "dammit" with a "Janet!".
-- Obsessing over metro-men. "That's so metro!"
-- "I'M FEELING SO EMO RIGHT NOW!"
-- Making bad puns: "How fun is chow fun?", for example, and "Hash brownies." Actually, only Phil finds that one amusing.
-- Phil! He pretends to be a pot-head, and does a damn good job at it!
-- "Philharmonic! Philly cheese steaks! Filter-man! Kill Phil! Chill Phil! Filmography! Re-fill! Philosophical! Regis Philbin! Phiiiiiiil!"
-- Sounding like a female cat when you scream.
-- Talking about necrocest with 13-year-olds over breakfast.
-- Meeting a kid whose name is ACTUALLY Jay Walker. :O
-- Having a drag day which people actually participate in. Dressing every boy in the camp in a skirt and teaching them all (unsuccessfully) how to keep their legs crossed. Tying their hair back in pigtails. Scaring the ballerinas with our drag queen-tastic tendencies.
-- Wearing the Aviator-Sunglasses and instantly becoming the coolest person in the world. Seriously, Phil's mother's sunglasses are like the CTY Travelling Pants. They make everybody look cool.
-- Having conversations like this with Yoda:
ALLIE: Dammit, we have nobody to dance with.
YODA: That's because you broke up with me, bitch!
ALLIE: You fucker!
YODA: Slut!
ALLIE: Whore!
YODA: That was only one night!
-- Singing The Darkness as loudly as we possibly can, as the whole hall listens. "GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF MY WOOOOMAN MOTHER-FUUUUUCKER!
-- Calling Memo the Crack Cocaine of CTY.
-- Actually, calling somebody Memo at all.
-- Actually, having his real name be Jameson, which is the kick-assest name ever.
-- Coming up with most excellent analogy ever for the difference between School!Boys and CTY!Boys. "So you're reaching out for the sour cream, but the lunch lady is like, no, you can't have any sour cream; and you're like, why not?, and then you hear a voice that says BECAUSE THAT IS NOT YOUR POTATO, and as you process this information, some girl runs up from behind you, snatches the potato off of your tray and makes for the exit, taking the entire tub of sour cream with her!"
-- Learning all about how Engels loved Marx and Marx used Engels and Engels made teddy-bear faces and Marx said, "Yeah, I got the money you sent me, bitch."
-- The King being a two-penny whore.
-- "Religion...is the opium of the masses."
-- "Fuck yeah!" from Phil the Pot-Head.
-- Wearing smelly trenchcoats, because that's...sexy. :P
-- Having orgies in your mouth! (Yeah, that's because of the hash brownies. Ha. Ha ha.)
-- MALLIKA: Ebert and Roper give it two thumbs up!
ALLIE: EBERT IS A SENILE OLD BAT! DAMMIT!
-- Showing your weenus as often as you possibly can. "My Mother Has Two Weenuses".
-- Playing the dip game.
-- "1...2...3...4...5...6...7...Phil, are you thinking about it?"
-- Singing the existentialist blues...smoking the existentialist crack...
-- "Ewies!"
"Dude, really ewies!"
-- ALLIE: Kiersten, don't you want to marry me anymore?
KIERSTEN: No. No, I don't want to marry you!
ALLIE: You tell me this on our wedding day? SCREW YOU!
KIERSTEN: You already did that last night!
-- MARSHALL: And Dan became DAN-MAN! He was exposed to radiation and then he bit himself, recieving all the powers of...himself!
EVERYBODY: Marshall, you told us that one already.
-- "Timmy, it doesn't matter. You have cancer."
-- David releasing his inner prostitute.
-- "You were so bad last night, I decided not to pay you."
-- Kicking butt after butt after butt after butt...
-- MALLIKA: David and I are friends with benefits. But he took the benefits away.
Later...
ALLIE: No benefiting in the Mac lab! Only macking in the Mac lab, no benefiting!
-- Only at CTY, kids...
That's all for now, folks, but I'm sure more explanations for CTY will be forthcoming. I love this camp, dammit. Janet.
- Allie
CTY IS ABOUT...
-- Getting heart-attack-inducingly excited over Duct Tape Appreciation!
-- Calling everybody on your hall, "Bitch!" and following every bitch with a, "You know I love you...bitch."
-- Mating goldfish; eating mating goldfish; eating virgin goldfish; mating chocolate chip cookies and then eating them, because orgasming and orgasmic sound the same, dammit!
-- Following every "dammit" with a "Janet!".
-- Obsessing over metro-men. "That's so metro!"
-- "I'M FEELING SO EMO RIGHT NOW!"
-- Making bad puns: "How fun is chow fun?", for example, and "Hash brownies." Actually, only Phil finds that one amusing.
-- Phil! He pretends to be a pot-head, and does a damn good job at it!
-- "Philharmonic! Philly cheese steaks! Filter-man! Kill Phil! Chill Phil! Filmography! Re-fill! Philosophical! Regis Philbin! Phiiiiiiil!"
-- Sounding like a female cat when you scream.
-- Talking about necrocest with 13-year-olds over breakfast.
-- Meeting a kid whose name is ACTUALLY Jay Walker. :O
-- Having a drag day which people actually participate in. Dressing every boy in the camp in a skirt and teaching them all (unsuccessfully) how to keep their legs crossed. Tying their hair back in pigtails. Scaring the ballerinas with our drag queen-tastic tendencies.
-- Wearing the Aviator-Sunglasses and instantly becoming the coolest person in the world. Seriously, Phil's mother's sunglasses are like the CTY Travelling Pants. They make everybody look cool.
-- Having conversations like this with Yoda:
ALLIE: Dammit, we have nobody to dance with.
YODA: That's because you broke up with me, bitch!
ALLIE: You fucker!
YODA: Slut!
ALLIE: Whore!
YODA: That was only one night!
-- Singing The Darkness as loudly as we possibly can, as the whole hall listens. "GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF MY WOOOOMAN MOTHER-FUUUUUCKER!
-- Calling Memo the Crack Cocaine of CTY.
-- Actually, calling somebody Memo at all.
-- Actually, having his real name be Jameson, which is the kick-assest name ever.
-- Coming up with most excellent analogy ever for the difference between School!Boys and CTY!Boys. "So you're reaching out for the sour cream, but the lunch lady is like, no, you can't have any sour cream; and you're like, why not?, and then you hear a voice that says BECAUSE THAT IS NOT YOUR POTATO, and as you process this information, some girl runs up from behind you, snatches the potato off of your tray and makes for the exit, taking the entire tub of sour cream with her!"
-- Learning all about how Engels loved Marx and Marx used Engels and Engels made teddy-bear faces and Marx said, "Yeah, I got the money you sent me, bitch."
-- The King being a two-penny whore.
-- "Religion...is the opium of the masses."
-- "Fuck yeah!" from Phil the Pot-Head.
-- Wearing smelly trenchcoats, because that's...sexy. :P
-- Having orgies in your mouth! (Yeah, that's because of the hash brownies. Ha. Ha ha.)
-- MALLIKA: Ebert and Roper give it two thumbs up!
ALLIE: EBERT IS A SENILE OLD BAT! DAMMIT!
-- Showing your weenus as often as you possibly can. "My Mother Has Two Weenuses".
-- Playing the dip game.
-- "1...2...3...4...5...6...7...Phil, are you thinking about it?"
-- Singing the existentialist blues...smoking the existentialist crack...
-- "Ewies!"
"Dude, really ewies!"
-- ALLIE: Kiersten, don't you want to marry me anymore?
KIERSTEN: No. No, I don't want to marry you!
ALLIE: You tell me this on our wedding day? SCREW YOU!
KIERSTEN: You already did that last night!
-- MARSHALL: And Dan became DAN-MAN! He was exposed to radiation and then he bit himself, recieving all the powers of...himself!
EVERYBODY: Marshall, you told us that one already.
-- "Timmy, it doesn't matter. You have cancer."
-- David releasing his inner prostitute.
-- "You were so bad last night, I decided not to pay you."
-- Kicking butt after butt after butt after butt...
-- MALLIKA: David and I are friends with benefits. But he took the benefits away.
Later...
ALLIE: No benefiting in the Mac lab! Only macking in the Mac lab, no benefiting!
-- Only at CTY, kids...
That's all for now, folks, but I'm sure more explanations for CTY will be forthcoming. I love this camp, dammit. Janet.
- Allie