Zhi felt like he couldn't breathe. He couldn't tear his eyes off the television as on-screen, the executions took place. A heavy weight settled in his chest and he took a step back. It was his fault-- it was all his fault.
He had sentenced Raivis and Valdi to death.
A deep shuddering breath was drawn and he brought shaking hands up to his face, pressing the balls of his palms against his eyes, forcing back the tears of guilt threatening to fall, because 天啊, he was responsible. He had spoken out his theory, he had accused Raivis, he had lead others to believe the same way when no one would have thought of suspecting them had he not said a word. But the two had been innocent.
Completely innocent.
His arms dropped to his sides, his gaze fixed blankly on the floor, standing there silently; the words, the apologies he wanted to speak trapped in his throat, slowly suffocating and choking on themselves. Zhi couldn't meet anyone's eyes-- how could he?- and he could only feel theirs' burning into him. Valdi's brother, Raivis' husband, all the people who had spoken up for the pair, and right beside him, by his side was Toris, Raivis' cousin, his own partner, the only person he could trust, and the only person who could trust him, who he hadn't believed.
Zhi opened his mouth as if to speak, only to close it once more, the words welling up and bursting within him without so much as whisper. Those words couldn't amount to anything, to any apology, and how could they, when it was words spoken by that same tongue which had lead the two to their deaths?
First was the video sending all of them into a trance of shock and numbness, then having to see his brother blame himself for accusing the wrong person, the wrong people. Yao felt that he should've died, should have died along with Peter to rid the sorrow and guilt etched in Zhi's face, the scorn his partner has, and the rage from the others. He should've let the game....the game....have...it's way....
No. He wouldn't fall for the game. Rory might have been right about all this being fucked up and disaster always in flux. Nevertheless, all he can do now is help Zhi gather his emotions together. It might somehow ease his heart as well.
"Had it been anyone else, people would start acting the same as you. The only thing we can do is move on and keep our guards up aru...." W-why? Why was he accepting all these events like it was, it was... "It's natural aru. In this game that is." Yao clenched his teeth against each other and with movement as shaky as an autumn leaf - not out of fear for his brother no, but rather out of his alternating emptions about the video, he took Zhi's hands with his own and held them tight. "You promised we'll get through this. We promised."
He had sentenced Raivis and Valdi to death.
A deep shuddering breath was drawn and he brought shaking hands up to his face, pressing the balls of his palms against his eyes, forcing back the tears of guilt threatening to fall, because 天啊, he was responsible. He had spoken out his theory, he had accused Raivis, he had lead others to believe the same way when no one would have thought of suspecting them had he not said a word. But the two had been innocent.
Completely innocent.
His arms dropped to his sides, his gaze fixed blankly on the floor, standing there silently; the words, the apologies he wanted to speak trapped in his throat, slowly suffocating and choking on themselves. Zhi couldn't meet anyone's eyes-- how could he?- and he could only feel theirs' burning into him. Valdi's brother, Raivis' husband, all the people who had spoken up for the pair, and right beside him, by his side was Toris, Raivis' cousin, his own partner, the only person he could trust, and the only person who could trust him, who he hadn't believed.
Zhi opened his mouth as if to speak, only to close it once more, the words welling up and bursting within him without so much as whisper. Those words couldn't amount to anything, to any apology, and how could they, when it was words spoken by that same tongue which had lead the two to their deaths?
Reply
First was the video sending all of them into a trance of shock and numbness, then having to see his brother blame himself for accusing the wrong person, the wrong people. Yao felt that he should've died, should have died along with Peter to rid the sorrow and guilt etched in Zhi's face, the scorn his partner has, and the rage from the others. He should've let the game....the game....have...it's way....
No. He wouldn't fall for the game. Rory might have been right about all this being fucked up and disaster always in flux. Nevertheless, all he can do now is help Zhi gather his emotions together. It might somehow ease his heart as well.
"Had it been anyone else, people would start acting the same as you. The only thing we can do is move on and keep our guards up aru...." W-why? Why was he accepting all these events like it was, it was... "It's natural aru. In this game that is." Yao clenched his teeth against each other and with movement as shaky as an autumn leaf - not out of fear for his brother no, but rather out of his alternating emptions about the video, he took Zhi's hands with his own and held them tight. "You promised we'll get through this. We promised."
Reply
Leave a comment