How to shop at Costco when heavily medicated (based on recent personal experience):
1) Take meds and wait for them to kick in.
2) Find bus. Ride bus. Exit bus at correct stop. Be surprised at getting it right the first time.
3) Find cart. Find neat stuff. Look all over the store. Repeat in case you missed something shiny. What were you doing again? Better try once more, just in case.
4) Oooh. Comfy chairs. Kinda woozy, better try them all.
5) Try to remember what you actually came for. Oooh. Comfy chair! No, that wasn't it. Better check the aisles again to be sure.
6) Wow, that cart is full. All that stuff isn't fitting on the bus. Well, it could fit, but you know what I mean. Better sort through it.
7) Why are all these people looking at me and staying far away?
8) Oooh. Phone call. Better find a comfy chair.
9) Okay, need to get home. Bus is soon. What did I actually need again? Oh! A list! I knew I had one! Um...this list is all wrong. I have hardly any of this stuff!
10) Hurry! Get right stuff! Pay! Condense everything to where you can get it on the bus! Why are all these people looking at me and staying far away?
11) Bus! Yay! Pain meds wearing off. Boo!
12) Ouchie shoulder = being painfully aware of how far it is until time to get off bus--i.e., forever....
13) Forever finally comes. Why did I get so much stuff? Ow!
14) Home at last. Hello, meds! I'm never leaving without you ever again ever!!
15) Oh, crap! Put milk away! Is it warm yet? No? Whew!
16) Share how to shop guide with closest, personalest friends. (That's you guys!)
17) Live happily ever after (until meds wear off again).
2) Find bus. Ride bus. Exit bus at correct stop. Be surprised at getting it right the first time.
3) Find cart. Find neat stuff. Look all over the store. Repeat in case you missed something shiny. What were you doing again? Better try once more, just in case.
4) Oooh. Comfy chairs. Kinda woozy, better try them all.
5) Try to remember what you actually came for. Oooh. Comfy chair! No, that wasn't it. Better check the aisles again to be sure.
6) Wow, that cart is full. All that stuff isn't fitting on the bus. Well, it could fit, but you know what I mean. Better sort through it.
7) Why are all these people looking at me and staying far away?
8) Oooh. Phone call. Better find a comfy chair.
9) Okay, need to get home. Bus is soon. What did I actually need again? Oh! A list! I knew I had one! Um...this list is all wrong. I have hardly any of this stuff!
10) Hurry! Get right stuff! Pay! Condense everything to where you can get it on the bus! Why are all these people looking at me and staying far away?
11) Bus! Yay! Pain meds wearing off. Boo!
12) Ouchie shoulder = being painfully aware of how far it is until time to get off bus--i.e., forever....
13) Forever finally comes. Why did I get so much stuff? Ow!
14) Home at last. Hello, meds! I'm never leaving without you ever again ever!!
15) Oh, crap! Put milk away! Is it warm yet? No? Whew!
16) Share how to shop guide with closest, personalest friends. (That's you guys!)
17) Live happily ever after (until meds wear off again).