I think therefore I am a jerk?
I have been playing a game called Horizons for a while. It was fun and I had some good guild mates but I decided I just don’t play enough to get my money’s worth. So I quit. It wasn’t as hard as quitting Everquest but it was hard. I liked the people a lot and the game was cool. I am going to buy Guild Wars because I like a lot that I have read about it. But most important because it comes with no user cost beyond the initial game cost and what ever the expansions will be.
We barbequed steak tonight and my wife made some fresh almond cooked green beans that were so yummy (this from a super picky eater) that I think I over ate just because of them! My life is so good and sometimes I catch myself complaining and I wonder - “geeze just how good do I need it anyway?” Life has been very kind to me, it gave me tough lessons at all the right times in my life. Even some of the very gruesome things that happened to me as a child have served to make me who I am today.
I am not a guy that feels sorry for himself, but I am a guy that thinks way too much! Sometimes I wish I could turn off the constant self-monolog I have running through my head all the time. Some of the stuff I think about even scares me. Sometimes my head is just down right irritating. One example is I will wake up almost every morning with some crazy song like “Raindrops keep falling on my head” or some other strange ass song that I haven’t heard in years playing clearly in my mind.
Sometimes its funny - but turning it off can take a while.
I was talking to GG and about six other friends about the difference between what you think and what you say. I call it the Clark Kent façade.
Clark Kent is really superman and when he’s talking to Lois Lane, he’s thinking like superman but speaking like something else, an ineffective, slight, polite non-threatening, unassuming lump. But he’s the man of steel. And he loves her. Is superman disingenuous? Is he a liar- or an archetype of all that women say about men being closed off from their true emotions?
So what if he is trying to protect her by keeping his identity a mystery. Besides no woman would buy that story now-a-days anyway. Has feminism killed superman? Course I am just kidding but seriously I think some strange things but I rarely ever say them without packaging them in the Clark Kent Façade. Let me give an example.
The other day at work I had to explain to a customer that when liquid (coffee) is spilled on a machine and it gets inside, that it is normal for a fuse to pop to save the circuitry. But then after I had nicely explained something to him that he should clearly know as a human of age 35+ he looked at me and said he thought his department might “need a more robust machine”.
The first thing I thought was, no what you need are crayons because your not supposed to give retarded children sharp pencils. Now that is horrible and I am really ashamed to write it here. Of course I didn’t say that to him, not just because he was a customer, but because I would be ashamed to hear that come out of my own mouth. But is thinking it a problem as well?
But you know it’s easy to stop eating badly, or to make yourself exercise. I can force myself to do anything if I believe I need to, but I can’t stop thinking like that. I think my next topic will be a detailed look at changing root thought. I have heard that when you turn your thoughts around enough in your mind that you start thinking like that initially - but I haven’t had that much luck trying that yet.
Anyway more to come on parenting after I reread what I have done so far.
We barbequed steak tonight and my wife made some fresh almond cooked green beans that were so yummy (this from a super picky eater) that I think I over ate just because of them! My life is so good and sometimes I catch myself complaining and I wonder - “geeze just how good do I need it anyway?” Life has been very kind to me, it gave me tough lessons at all the right times in my life. Even some of the very gruesome things that happened to me as a child have served to make me who I am today.
I am not a guy that feels sorry for himself, but I am a guy that thinks way too much! Sometimes I wish I could turn off the constant self-monolog I have running through my head all the time. Some of the stuff I think about even scares me. Sometimes my head is just down right irritating. One example is I will wake up almost every morning with some crazy song like “Raindrops keep falling on my head” or some other strange ass song that I haven’t heard in years playing clearly in my mind.
Sometimes its funny - but turning it off can take a while.
I was talking to GG and about six other friends about the difference between what you think and what you say. I call it the Clark Kent façade.
Clark Kent is really superman and when he’s talking to Lois Lane, he’s thinking like superman but speaking like something else, an ineffective, slight, polite non-threatening, unassuming lump. But he’s the man of steel. And he loves her. Is superman disingenuous? Is he a liar- or an archetype of all that women say about men being closed off from their true emotions?
So what if he is trying to protect her by keeping his identity a mystery. Besides no woman would buy that story now-a-days anyway. Has feminism killed superman? Course I am just kidding but seriously I think some strange things but I rarely ever say them without packaging them in the Clark Kent Façade. Let me give an example.
The other day at work I had to explain to a customer that when liquid (coffee) is spilled on a machine and it gets inside, that it is normal for a fuse to pop to save the circuitry. But then after I had nicely explained something to him that he should clearly know as a human of age 35+ he looked at me and said he thought his department might “need a more robust machine”.
The first thing I thought was, no what you need are crayons because your not supposed to give retarded children sharp pencils. Now that is horrible and I am really ashamed to write it here. Of course I didn’t say that to him, not just because he was a customer, but because I would be ashamed to hear that come out of my own mouth. But is thinking it a problem as well?
But you know it’s easy to stop eating badly, or to make yourself exercise. I can force myself to do anything if I believe I need to, but I can’t stop thinking like that. I think my next topic will be a detailed look at changing root thought. I have heard that when you turn your thoughts around enough in your mind that you start thinking like that initially - but I haven’t had that much luck trying that yet.
Anyway more to come on parenting after I reread what I have done so far.