Cheerful as Can Be
This Post is in Honor of sophia_helix, if you'd like a post for you fill out this poll if you haven't already.
Literature (and maybe some not quite Lit):
Novelists
Fyodor Dostoyevsky: The margins to my copy of Notes from Underground, the first piece of Dostoyevsky I ever laid my hands on, are filled with notations like "OMG MARRY ME!" The (I guess it's a) novella remains my favorite Dostoyevsky so far (having read Crime and Punishment and The Idiot as well at this point) and Dostoyevsky remains my dead Russian boyfriend. From the underground man's first sentence I felt like Dostoyevsky could see inside my head, like he knew me better than I knew myself perhaps. For me this novella is the quintessential Dostoyevsky because, while his plots are fine, it is the internal life of his characters that really is Dostoyevsky's miraculous point. His characters reason themselves around in circles until black is white and then back round again over again. Words cannot express how much you need to read Dostoyevsky. He is utterly brilliant, and you can pick a book of pretty much any size with him, so no need to be afraid of the Tolstoy-esque gigantic book issue of the Great Russian writers (not that I don't reccomend Tolstoy...because I do).
Joseph Heller: As far as I am concerned Catch-22 isThe Great American Novel. Heller will have you laughing out loud and yet his work is also poignant, touching, and vital. His characters are absurd and yet real, his structure is dizzying and yet beautiful. All the time you wasted in American Lit reading Hemmingway and Hawthorne should have been spent reading this book. It is a long read, more so than the pages would suggest, but it is totally a worthwhile one and by no means umpleasant and torturous like reading one of the longer Steinbeck novels. It's amusing and yet cuts to the heart of a lot of things. I have yet to read the sequel, Closing Time out of fear of dissapointment, but I did read Good as Gold and it was also really good amusing and true, it will especially hit home if you deal with: beaurocracy, academia, or being an American Jew. It's a lesser book to Catch-22 but still definitely a good one if you don't want to deal with the whole war thing.
Poets
Edna St. Vincet Millay: Every time I make a poll or one of those friends tests and ask who my faovrite poet is, people always answer Sylvia Plath (I guess that's what happens when she uses your name as a title) or Emily Dickenson. They are at least on the right track as far as it being an American woman, but the poetess of my heart is the less automatic response of: Enda St. Vincent Millay. She's an amazing lyric poet, who primarily writes sonnets that prove that the form is nowhere near dead and is very much usable in the modern era. I wrote a paper, actually two or maybe three?, in highschool about how in Millay we see essentially the coexistance and tension between romatism and cynism. She speaks to my heart, and I think she'd speak to yours...besides she's established enough that you can pick a book of her poems up from Dover... and what's a dollar or two? or you can usually find something of hers in the used section of any bookstore.
Mary Oliver: I have never liked nature poetry. In fact I dislike it and find it boring and maudlin... except for when Oliver does it. She's a contemporary poet, still producing stuff last time I checked and she proved to me that nature poetry doesn't have to suck, that it can be edgy and compelling I don't know how to give stronger reccomendation than that.
Playwrights
Jean Paul Sartre: I had heard of No Exit before, but when I finally read it and The Flies my sophomore year of college, I continued on to read the last play in the book I had Dirty Hands and then followed it up by taking an Existentialism Class. It was that good. Sartre manages to be philosophical without sacrificing the performability (or readability) of his plays. Also if you are a mythology geek like me it's amazing to see what he's done with Electra/The Libation Bearers (depending on which of the greek playwrights your are reading) in The Flies. Who could refuse the guy who simply states "hell is other people"... playing on our weaknesses and showing us how we destoy ourselves and eachother, and yet still has hope.
Oscar Wilde: Nobody is wittier than Oscar Wilde, and while his plays are very much stuck in the Victorian Era that does not make them feel dusty or old in the way of so many comedy of manners type things. Wilde is dealing with human nature though the way that society filters and messes with it, so at the root that humanity is still there. Nothing is as light as Wilde when he is making his darkest points. (Besides all you slashers should read him just for the simple fact that he was martyred for his gayness).
Fantasy Writers
George R.R. Martin: His current series, A Song of Ice and Fire, promises to the GREATEST FANTASY SERIES. His characters are intricrite and his world building is amazing from so many angles. This is THE series of our time at the very least and if you haven't jumped on the bandwagon yet... you need to at some point. All you fic writers and RPGers should be reading this series because it's the perfect world to play in.
Garth Nix: His trilogy Sabriel, Lirael, and Abhorsen are dark without being gratituous. He delivers what he promises. His system of death and necromancy is fascinating and his characters are comfortable without being overly cliche. It's good. Period. His new series The Keeper of the Keys is more YA Lit-ey but it's still good so far and if you are like me and like allusions and organizational schemes it's a good bet for something relatively light and yet not too fluffy.
So How are Things Going in the Life of Ariel?:
So as of this past Monday I started my new position and I've been doing curriculum stuff the past few days (which is 15% of my position but it's finals week so this is when it's really needed), most of it is fairly inane but I like the organizational aspect of it and find it soothing compiling syllabi, alphebatizing exams and running them through the scatron machine, and entering grades. I've already been doing the merit and promotion stuff so I know I can handle that, and in a week or two my boss is training me for the recruitment process part of my job. I feel useful and haven't been spending all my time on lj as a result. I am looking forward to moving out in probably May. I am really pretty happy with the direction things are going, though I still need to figure out where I want to apply to graduate school. I am still feeling totally comfortable and content with being utterly single.
...Although I do miss the unboyfriend, not in a sexual sense but just in an intimacy way. Today would have been our 3 year un-anniversary. I guess I'll call him tonight.
That sort of leads me in to the fact that Facing New York are playing in Sacramento on Monday and I sort of want to go, even though the whole not seeing them thing has been really good for me. Facing New York are amazing... how could they not be when Eric Frederic is who he is? Most of the time I don't think about them or him at all anymore and that's much better for me psychologically because I idolize him but really I have to stay away where I won't learn things I don't want to know. Besides, when I start being a good fan I start wanting to be noticed, whether I like to admit it or not... and then I get resentful and he either doesn't remember me or thinks of me badly and I cannot handle that.
Okay, for those of you who aren't part of my offline life: I used to be into a music scene... from my Senior year of highschool to partway through college... I can't say when it ended really. I was there every week... muliple times most weekends, all of my social life was centered around bands and the other people who saw them. If you use the word groupie I will have to hurt you, but yes I did sleep with a few of the band guys. What else do you expect happens when they are the only guys you really hang around with? Regardless. By the end of my freshman year of college I was absolutely bowled over by Locale AM and I think it really prompted a big change in me away from my old habits because I didn't want them to think of me as some stupid slutty girl. In some ways things worked out better with Locale than any other band personally because their bassist Isa and I ended up being really good friends... he's one of the very few people I actually hang out with these days and I hope I have him in my life forever. However, their keyboardist Rene always seemed condescending like woah to me and I felt so very judgded, and matters were not made better by the fact that I was totally in awe of their singer Eric. So anyway, Locale broke up the winter of my sophomore year, during possibly the worst two weeks of my life and I was crushed. In many ways it gave me an out though, no real reason to keep bothering with the whole show thing. Except, Eric and Rene formed a new band within 2 months with 2 guys that I knew from another band I'd been fond of, as well as an unfarmilar bassist. Facing New York. How could I not be intregued? I was probably the first rabid fan of the band, the day songs went up I listened to them for like 18 hours straight and cursed having to go to class because it interrupted my listening. I fell deeply in love with Facing New York. I made a huge effort to go see them whenever possible (and this was when I was without a car so it was a lot of effort) and I seriously had to choke back tears when they played it effected me so much. I was shy though, and worried that they'd misinterpert any praise I gave them so I just stayed quiet and didn't say much to them. I was just there. I might not have minded the fact that they didnt really seem to value me being a fan, if it hadn't been for how appreciative they were of my friend Shona. They loved Shona, told her how much her fanship meant. They were not the first, bands (especially the singers) have always appreciated Shona's fanship. Sometimes I'd read about Shona's encounters with them and like... I'd been planning on going to a show that week but I couldn't because I knew the contrast would be too painful. I guess it just was one too many, and I had been there from the beginning and it came to a head when I finally was like screw it and didn't go to their cd release show last fall and just bought the cd from Tower instead. It's not that I stopped loving them, it just hurt too much to be there all the time. I probably will never write the novel I intended to about it. I had hoped the novel might be a way to explain things, a way to tell Eric how much I admired him without sounding like a stupid little girl. I have a hard time talking to people I am impressed by, I tend to come off sounding stupid and giggly and I hate myself. I sort of want to go see Facing New York next week though. It's in Sacramento, so not much of a drive, and it's 21+ so no little girls, and well it's not like I am going to run into anyone I know. I might as well go. I mean the worst that could happen is I would be uncomfortable and leave right? Or maybe not. I quit shows for a reason.... but then again it's A show not lots and it's not like I am ever going back to that. It would be good to go out. Of course I HATE going places by myself so that's a problem since I have no one to go with... oh I don't know.
Back when Cristina and Burke were broken up on Grey's Anatomy mom and I used to argue about who was at fault. Mom said Burke was and I said Cristina was... I was totally right. Yes Burke broke things off...but he did it because Cristina totally blew him off... yes she blew him off because she was distressed about being pregnant... but the fact of the matter is that he couldn't have known that and she wouldn't talk to him about it. Yet in the moment people are all "oh poor Cristina, she's pregnant and Burke dumped her!" Now people are mad at Alex again... and hey Alex can be an asshole... but really Izzie is the one being a gigantic bitch. Maybe Alex's motives aren't entirely pure but he's right and he also is largely acting out of a concern for Izzie's well being (although self interest does get involved). If Izzie is still pissed about the Olivia thing that is fine... but she is taking out her upset about Denny on Alex and absolutely no one deserves to be told that they are not good enough for anyone. That is sort of unforgivable in my book. So I am pissed at Izzie personally. Izzie, you are the one flirting with a dying man. Alex is just trying to protect you and your relationship with him. It's actually sort of unfair that you are ditching him for a dying man because it's not a fair fight. If you were ditching him for some other doctor he could fight for you... but since Denny is dying he isn't allowed to do anything. You two are both such freaking water signs and you shell up and he goes off the deep end and in a few weeks time you will realize that you were totally wrong. And yes I still totally ship Alex/Izzie and I think he will forgive her when she comes around eventually.
BtVS:
Xander is the representative male of the show. She there are others but Xander is the boy of their generation, the male scoobie. He's also the least special character on the show. Sure he has the power of love or whatever but really... Buffy and Willow (and most of the other important characters) can save or destroy the world... and Xander is just a normal loserish guy. Buffy's independance gets her into trouble as a teenager, but as an adult it's a good thing, and Willow's intelligence works the same way... but Xander is essentially just some of lame. Do I feel sorry for him? Maybe. Does that make him any less infuriating or excuse his behavior? Not at all. Xander's character is basically about the sense of emasculation, and the lure and repellant, of being an ordinary man around extraordinary women. From the first episode, Xander wants to serve as a traditional male, to rescue and protect, but the women of this show don't really need protection, and even if they did he's ill equipped to give it. So the show really poses the question, What then? And Joss, while he might be right, doesn't really give us a heartening answer. Xander sulks and interferes and screws things up with his sense of inferiority. Yes he does bring Willow back to herself, but that doesn't undo the moments like at the end of season 2 when he changes Willow's message to Buffy regarding Angel. Yes, I get why he does it... but it's still a crappy thing to do and well every time I am pretty much over Xander's last stupid move... he makes another one. Generally speaking, Xander really is superflurous. I mean sure he has amusing moments, and the rest of the characters are fond of him. I know Joss meant him to be important, but I guess it's just really good gender reversal, because he's just like some adoring female in a traditional story... half the time getting in the way instead of helping. So no, I don't like Xander, but I could easily write a paper about him.
From the moment that Wesley appeared on BtVS in season 3... he and Cordelia are all hot for each other. Then suddenly he appears in AtS midway through season 1 and... there is not the slightest spark between them. Why? It's sort of a puzzling thing that seems like a strange plot device, until you consider what has happened to each of them in this time. In BtVS Cordelia was the spoiled little rich bitch, and she's lost that. Her family is penniless and when we see her in the beginning of AtS she is living in a revolting apartment too ashamed to even call her former friends. Needless to say, while of course there are some things about Cordelia that never change, she has been signifigantly altered by this course of events. On BtVS Wesley is a bookish, stuck up, uptight, rule bound member of the Watcher's Council. By the time we see him in AtS, he's seen the rules of the council make things worse instead of better, been kicked out of said council; when we first see him, he is wearing leather for god's sake. Like Cordelia, he does maintain soem of his personality, especially after both find a sort of home and shelter with Angel and revert back to thier old attitudes more. But neither is ever the same. So is it a wonder that things aren't the same between them? Not really. They are different people, thus interested in different things in other people even if one of them was the same it wouldn't have been the same between them, and they are doubly changed.
No joking, I honestly do handwrite Arthurian Legend Erotica when no one is looking. Recently it's been a lot of Lot/Morgause and Morgause/Uther, even though originally it was totally going to be about Morgan/Arthur. Morgause/Uther is just so wrongdirtybad! and Morgause/Lot is just so PWP by nature... because I just see them as both being so sexual (Morgause is almost always portrayed as a skank and I forget what version it is in that says Lot was the one man to father enough sons to have an army entirely comprised of them between the legitamite ones and the bastards). And of course Morgan(a)/Arthur satisfies the incest kink I have. Really, if you think about it the Legend is full of the taboo... primarily adultery and incest. I mean in 8th Grade I wrote a huge paper about the representation of relationships (focusing on adultery) in different versions of the myth. I mean the wrongness is not the only reason that I am interested in the legend... there are some more wholesome themes that intregue. I just find it interesting that really... the Arthurian Legend satisfies so very many kinks without being totally non-canon like so many fandom corners are.
Speaking of fandom corners, there was a literal friending frenzy in sionnain's journal the other day. I said I wanted to hide in a corner with those that share my love of het incest (in relation to Harry Potter and my Sirius/Bellatrix OTP) and well...apparently her friendspage is the place to look. So a little late but very warm welcome to: absinthe_lust, blue_blazes, kethlenda, roguebelle, and starrysummer. May the het and incest live on.
hobviously originally got me to watch Firefly by promising Crazy Space Incest(Simon/River) and The Great Hufflepuff Love Affair(Simon/Kaylee). It is only looking back on it that I find it at all strange that the pimp would involve seemingly conflicting ships (unless you want to go into River/Simon/Kaylee and I don't). Only a Hufflepuff (Simon) could possibly have enough loyalty for two women (and even he is strained). Really though, a huge porportion of Serenity's crew are Hufflepuffs. Mal is the biggest Gryffindor to ever live, and Jayne is such a raw Slytherin. Inara skates the line between Slytherin and Ravenclaw and Zoe the line between Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff (the scene in "The Message" where she is saying to never give your position away and then Mal is like being the living target so exemplifies the contrast between Gryffindor and Ravenclaw). River is sort of too crazy to actually have us know what she would have been but we tend to guess Ravenclaw because she's brilliant and she tends to intellectualize things (like Book's bible). Book is sort of too enlightened at this point for us to really say what he is... I could make an argument for any house. So that leaves us with at least Simon, Kaylee, and Wash as Hufflepuffs... they all more definitely are in my book. 9 main cast members and a third are Hufflepuff... and that makes sense because Hufflepuffs are what keeps the wheels of the world turning... but it's unusual in fiction. "Big Damn Heroes" tend to be Gryffindors or Slytherins, with a Ravenclaw advisor and maybe a Hufflepuff thrown in but not particularly likely. (And another comment about Xander. He is so NOT a Hufflepuff in my book in case you were wondering). So I do love Firefly for having such great Hufflepuffs and showing that Hufflepuffs do matter. In Serenity when the operative says that it's not insanity but love that makes Simon so very dangerous, I tend to think to myself that essentially it is his Hufflepuff nature that truly makes Simon dangerous. So yes, from the pen of Joss. FEAR THE BADGERS. Also I think it's interesting to look at the Jayne/Kaylee subtext, which is obvious to me upon rewatching. It totally validates my theory about Slytherin/Hufflepuff being a totally better match than the whole love/hate Slytherin/Gryffindor that we all love. The latter are always trying to change each other, where as the prior so very much would be better able to emcorporate and OMG I think I am coming out of the closet as a Jayne/Kaylee shipper.
Poll
Literature (and maybe some not quite Lit):
Novelists
Fyodor Dostoyevsky: The margins to my copy of Notes from Underground, the first piece of Dostoyevsky I ever laid my hands on, are filled with notations like "OMG MARRY ME!" The (I guess it's a) novella remains my favorite Dostoyevsky so far (having read Crime and Punishment and The Idiot as well at this point) and Dostoyevsky remains my dead Russian boyfriend. From the underground man's first sentence I felt like Dostoyevsky could see inside my head, like he knew me better than I knew myself perhaps. For me this novella is the quintessential Dostoyevsky because, while his plots are fine, it is the internal life of his characters that really is Dostoyevsky's miraculous point. His characters reason themselves around in circles until black is white and then back round again over again. Words cannot express how much you need to read Dostoyevsky. He is utterly brilliant, and you can pick a book of pretty much any size with him, so no need to be afraid of the Tolstoy-esque gigantic book issue of the Great Russian writers (not that I don't reccomend Tolstoy...because I do).
Joseph Heller: As far as I am concerned Catch-22 isThe Great American Novel. Heller will have you laughing out loud and yet his work is also poignant, touching, and vital. His characters are absurd and yet real, his structure is dizzying and yet beautiful. All the time you wasted in American Lit reading Hemmingway and Hawthorne should have been spent reading this book. It is a long read, more so than the pages would suggest, but it is totally a worthwhile one and by no means umpleasant and torturous like reading one of the longer Steinbeck novels. It's amusing and yet cuts to the heart of a lot of things. I have yet to read the sequel, Closing Time out of fear of dissapointment, but I did read Good as Gold and it was also really good amusing and true, it will especially hit home if you deal with: beaurocracy, academia, or being an American Jew. It's a lesser book to Catch-22 but still definitely a good one if you don't want to deal with the whole war thing.
Poets
Edna St. Vincet Millay: Every time I make a poll or one of those friends tests and ask who my faovrite poet is, people always answer Sylvia Plath (I guess that's what happens when she uses your name as a title) or Emily Dickenson. They are at least on the right track as far as it being an American woman, but the poetess of my heart is the less automatic response of: Enda St. Vincent Millay. She's an amazing lyric poet, who primarily writes sonnets that prove that the form is nowhere near dead and is very much usable in the modern era. I wrote a paper, actually two or maybe three?, in highschool about how in Millay we see essentially the coexistance and tension between romatism and cynism. She speaks to my heart, and I think she'd speak to yours...besides she's established enough that you can pick a book of her poems up from Dover... and what's a dollar or two? or you can usually find something of hers in the used section of any bookstore.
Mary Oliver: I have never liked nature poetry. In fact I dislike it and find it boring and maudlin... except for when Oliver does it. She's a contemporary poet, still producing stuff last time I checked and she proved to me that nature poetry doesn't have to suck, that it can be edgy and compelling I don't know how to give stronger reccomendation than that.
Playwrights
Jean Paul Sartre: I had heard of No Exit before, but when I finally read it and The Flies my sophomore year of college, I continued on to read the last play in the book I had Dirty Hands and then followed it up by taking an Existentialism Class. It was that good. Sartre manages to be philosophical without sacrificing the performability (or readability) of his plays. Also if you are a mythology geek like me it's amazing to see what he's done with Electra/The Libation Bearers (depending on which of the greek playwrights your are reading) in The Flies. Who could refuse the guy who simply states "hell is other people"... playing on our weaknesses and showing us how we destoy ourselves and eachother, and yet still has hope.
Oscar Wilde: Nobody is wittier than Oscar Wilde, and while his plays are very much stuck in the Victorian Era that does not make them feel dusty or old in the way of so many comedy of manners type things. Wilde is dealing with human nature though the way that society filters and messes with it, so at the root that humanity is still there. Nothing is as light as Wilde when he is making his darkest points. (Besides all you slashers should read him just for the simple fact that he was martyred for his gayness).
Fantasy Writers
George R.R. Martin: His current series, A Song of Ice and Fire, promises to the GREATEST FANTASY SERIES. His characters are intricrite and his world building is amazing from so many angles. This is THE series of our time at the very least and if you haven't jumped on the bandwagon yet... you need to at some point. All you fic writers and RPGers should be reading this series because it's the perfect world to play in.
Garth Nix: His trilogy Sabriel, Lirael, and Abhorsen are dark without being gratituous. He delivers what he promises. His system of death and necromancy is fascinating and his characters are comfortable without being overly cliche. It's good. Period. His new series The Keeper of the Keys is more YA Lit-ey but it's still good so far and if you are like me and like allusions and organizational schemes it's a good bet for something relatively light and yet not too fluffy.
So How are Things Going in the Life of Ariel?:
So as of this past Monday I started my new position and I've been doing curriculum stuff the past few days (which is 15% of my position but it's finals week so this is when it's really needed), most of it is fairly inane but I like the organizational aspect of it and find it soothing compiling syllabi, alphebatizing exams and running them through the scatron machine, and entering grades. I've already been doing the merit and promotion stuff so I know I can handle that, and in a week or two my boss is training me for the recruitment process part of my job. I feel useful and haven't been spending all my time on lj as a result. I am looking forward to moving out in probably May. I am really pretty happy with the direction things are going, though I still need to figure out where I want to apply to graduate school. I am still feeling totally comfortable and content with being utterly single.
...Although I do miss the unboyfriend, not in a sexual sense but just in an intimacy way. Today would have been our 3 year un-anniversary. I guess I'll call him tonight.
That sort of leads me in to the fact that Facing New York are playing in Sacramento on Monday and I sort of want to go, even though the whole not seeing them thing has been really good for me. Facing New York are amazing... how could they not be when Eric Frederic is who he is? Most of the time I don't think about them or him at all anymore and that's much better for me psychologically because I idolize him but really I have to stay away where I won't learn things I don't want to know. Besides, when I start being a good fan I start wanting to be noticed, whether I like to admit it or not... and then I get resentful and he either doesn't remember me or thinks of me badly and I cannot handle that.
Okay, for those of you who aren't part of my offline life: I used to be into a music scene... from my Senior year of highschool to partway through college... I can't say when it ended really. I was there every week... muliple times most weekends, all of my social life was centered around bands and the other people who saw them. If you use the word groupie I will have to hurt you, but yes I did sleep with a few of the band guys. What else do you expect happens when they are the only guys you really hang around with? Regardless. By the end of my freshman year of college I was absolutely bowled over by Locale AM and I think it really prompted a big change in me away from my old habits because I didn't want them to think of me as some stupid slutty girl. In some ways things worked out better with Locale than any other band personally because their bassist Isa and I ended up being really good friends... he's one of the very few people I actually hang out with these days and I hope I have him in my life forever. However, their keyboardist Rene always seemed condescending like woah to me and I felt so very judgded, and matters were not made better by the fact that I was totally in awe of their singer Eric. So anyway, Locale broke up the winter of my sophomore year, during possibly the worst two weeks of my life and I was crushed. In many ways it gave me an out though, no real reason to keep bothering with the whole show thing. Except, Eric and Rene formed a new band within 2 months with 2 guys that I knew from another band I'd been fond of, as well as an unfarmilar bassist. Facing New York. How could I not be intregued? I was probably the first rabid fan of the band, the day songs went up I listened to them for like 18 hours straight and cursed having to go to class because it interrupted my listening. I fell deeply in love with Facing New York. I made a huge effort to go see them whenever possible (and this was when I was without a car so it was a lot of effort) and I seriously had to choke back tears when they played it effected me so much. I was shy though, and worried that they'd misinterpert any praise I gave them so I just stayed quiet and didn't say much to them. I was just there. I might not have minded the fact that they didnt really seem to value me being a fan, if it hadn't been for how appreciative they were of my friend Shona. They loved Shona, told her how much her fanship meant. They were not the first, bands (especially the singers) have always appreciated Shona's fanship. Sometimes I'd read about Shona's encounters with them and like... I'd been planning on going to a show that week but I couldn't because I knew the contrast would be too painful. I guess it just was one too many, and I had been there from the beginning and it came to a head when I finally was like screw it and didn't go to their cd release show last fall and just bought the cd from Tower instead. It's not that I stopped loving them, it just hurt too much to be there all the time. I probably will never write the novel I intended to about it. I had hoped the novel might be a way to explain things, a way to tell Eric how much I admired him without sounding like a stupid little girl. I have a hard time talking to people I am impressed by, I tend to come off sounding stupid and giggly and I hate myself. I sort of want to go see Facing New York next week though. It's in Sacramento, so not much of a drive, and it's 21+ so no little girls, and well it's not like I am going to run into anyone I know. I might as well go. I mean the worst that could happen is I would be uncomfortable and leave right? Or maybe not. I quit shows for a reason.... but then again it's A show not lots and it's not like I am ever going back to that. It would be good to go out. Of course I HATE going places by myself so that's a problem since I have no one to go with... oh I don't know.
Back when Cristina and Burke were broken up on Grey's Anatomy mom and I used to argue about who was at fault. Mom said Burke was and I said Cristina was... I was totally right. Yes Burke broke things off...but he did it because Cristina totally blew him off... yes she blew him off because she was distressed about being pregnant... but the fact of the matter is that he couldn't have known that and she wouldn't talk to him about it. Yet in the moment people are all "oh poor Cristina, she's pregnant and Burke dumped her!" Now people are mad at Alex again... and hey Alex can be an asshole... but really Izzie is the one being a gigantic bitch. Maybe Alex's motives aren't entirely pure but he's right and he also is largely acting out of a concern for Izzie's well being (although self interest does get involved). If Izzie is still pissed about the Olivia thing that is fine... but she is taking out her upset about Denny on Alex and absolutely no one deserves to be told that they are not good enough for anyone. That is sort of unforgivable in my book. So I am pissed at Izzie personally. Izzie, you are the one flirting with a dying man. Alex is just trying to protect you and your relationship with him. It's actually sort of unfair that you are ditching him for a dying man because it's not a fair fight. If you were ditching him for some other doctor he could fight for you... but since Denny is dying he isn't allowed to do anything. You two are both such freaking water signs and you shell up and he goes off the deep end and in a few weeks time you will realize that you were totally wrong. And yes I still totally ship Alex/Izzie and I think he will forgive her when she comes around eventually.
BtVS:
Xander is the representative male of the show. She there are others but Xander is the boy of their generation, the male scoobie. He's also the least special character on the show. Sure he has the power of love or whatever but really... Buffy and Willow (and most of the other important characters) can save or destroy the world... and Xander is just a normal loserish guy. Buffy's independance gets her into trouble as a teenager, but as an adult it's a good thing, and Willow's intelligence works the same way... but Xander is essentially just some of lame. Do I feel sorry for him? Maybe. Does that make him any less infuriating or excuse his behavior? Not at all. Xander's character is basically about the sense of emasculation, and the lure and repellant, of being an ordinary man around extraordinary women. From the first episode, Xander wants to serve as a traditional male, to rescue and protect, but the women of this show don't really need protection, and even if they did he's ill equipped to give it. So the show really poses the question, What then? And Joss, while he might be right, doesn't really give us a heartening answer. Xander sulks and interferes and screws things up with his sense of inferiority. Yes he does bring Willow back to herself, but that doesn't undo the moments like at the end of season 2 when he changes Willow's message to Buffy regarding Angel. Yes, I get why he does it... but it's still a crappy thing to do and well every time I am pretty much over Xander's last stupid move... he makes another one. Generally speaking, Xander really is superflurous. I mean sure he has amusing moments, and the rest of the characters are fond of him. I know Joss meant him to be important, but I guess it's just really good gender reversal, because he's just like some adoring female in a traditional story... half the time getting in the way instead of helping. So no, I don't like Xander, but I could easily write a paper about him.
From the moment that Wesley appeared on BtVS in season 3... he and Cordelia are all hot for each other. Then suddenly he appears in AtS midway through season 1 and... there is not the slightest spark between them. Why? It's sort of a puzzling thing that seems like a strange plot device, until you consider what has happened to each of them in this time. In BtVS Cordelia was the spoiled little rich bitch, and she's lost that. Her family is penniless and when we see her in the beginning of AtS she is living in a revolting apartment too ashamed to even call her former friends. Needless to say, while of course there are some things about Cordelia that never change, she has been signifigantly altered by this course of events. On BtVS Wesley is a bookish, stuck up, uptight, rule bound member of the Watcher's Council. By the time we see him in AtS, he's seen the rules of the council make things worse instead of better, been kicked out of said council; when we first see him, he is wearing leather for god's sake. Like Cordelia, he does maintain soem of his personality, especially after both find a sort of home and shelter with Angel and revert back to thier old attitudes more. But neither is ever the same. So is it a wonder that things aren't the same between them? Not really. They are different people, thus interested in different things in other people even if one of them was the same it wouldn't have been the same between them, and they are doubly changed.
No joking, I honestly do handwrite Arthurian Legend Erotica when no one is looking. Recently it's been a lot of Lot/Morgause and Morgause/Uther, even though originally it was totally going to be about Morgan/Arthur. Morgause/Uther is just so wrongdirtybad! and Morgause/Lot is just so PWP by nature... because I just see them as both being so sexual (Morgause is almost always portrayed as a skank and I forget what version it is in that says Lot was the one man to father enough sons to have an army entirely comprised of them between the legitamite ones and the bastards). And of course Morgan(a)/Arthur satisfies the incest kink I have. Really, if you think about it the Legend is full of the taboo... primarily adultery and incest. I mean in 8th Grade I wrote a huge paper about the representation of relationships (focusing on adultery) in different versions of the myth. I mean the wrongness is not the only reason that I am interested in the legend... there are some more wholesome themes that intregue. I just find it interesting that really... the Arthurian Legend satisfies so very many kinks without being totally non-canon like so many fandom corners are.
Speaking of fandom corners, there was a literal friending frenzy in sionnain's journal the other day. I said I wanted to hide in a corner with those that share my love of het incest (in relation to Harry Potter and my Sirius/Bellatrix OTP) and well...apparently her friendspage is the place to look. So a little late but very warm welcome to: absinthe_lust, blue_blazes, kethlenda, roguebelle, and starrysummer. May the het and incest live on.
hobviously originally got me to watch Firefly by promising Crazy Space Incest(Simon/River) and The Great Hufflepuff Love Affair(Simon/Kaylee). It is only looking back on it that I find it at all strange that the pimp would involve seemingly conflicting ships (unless you want to go into River/Simon/Kaylee and I don't). Only a Hufflepuff (Simon) could possibly have enough loyalty for two women (and even he is strained). Really though, a huge porportion of Serenity's crew are Hufflepuffs. Mal is the biggest Gryffindor to ever live, and Jayne is such a raw Slytherin. Inara skates the line between Slytherin and Ravenclaw and Zoe the line between Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff (the scene in "The Message" where she is saying to never give your position away and then Mal is like being the living target so exemplifies the contrast between Gryffindor and Ravenclaw). River is sort of too crazy to actually have us know what she would have been but we tend to guess Ravenclaw because she's brilliant and she tends to intellectualize things (like Book's bible). Book is sort of too enlightened at this point for us to really say what he is... I could make an argument for any house. So that leaves us with at least Simon, Kaylee, and Wash as Hufflepuffs... they all more definitely are in my book. 9 main cast members and a third are Hufflepuff... and that makes sense because Hufflepuffs are what keeps the wheels of the world turning... but it's unusual in fiction. "Big Damn Heroes" tend to be Gryffindors or Slytherins, with a Ravenclaw advisor and maybe a Hufflepuff thrown in but not particularly likely. (And another comment about Xander. He is so NOT a Hufflepuff in my book in case you were wondering). So I do love Firefly for having such great Hufflepuffs and showing that Hufflepuffs do matter. In Serenity when the operative says that it's not insanity but love that makes Simon so very dangerous, I tend to think to myself that essentially it is his Hufflepuff nature that truly makes Simon dangerous. So yes, from the pen of Joss. FEAR THE BADGERS. Also I think it's interesting to look at the Jayne/Kaylee subtext, which is obvious to me upon rewatching. It totally validates my theory about Slytherin/Hufflepuff being a totally better match than the whole love/hate Slytherin/Gryffindor that we all love. The latter are always trying to change each other, where as the prior so very much would be better able to emcorporate and OMG I think I am coming out of the closet as a Jayne/Kaylee shipper.
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