we go from year to year with secrets we've been keeping
The plant on the windowsill next to my desk has seen better days. I think it's a pothos. I've heard it takes a lot to kill pothos plants. Guess I'm just talented.
It's faded like everything else at the station. Some days it just gets to me. The cookie-cutter sameness of everyone here -- the unwillingness to see anything that isn't straight up black and white. Every morning as I'm scrubbing dried coffee-cup rings left from whoever used my desk the shift before, I wonder: do I really want to keep doing this? I thought the world had ended when I was put on leave, because being a cop was the only thing I knew. It seemed like a disgrace to Dad's memory for me to fail at it.
Now that I've been reinstated, though, I've learned how to stay low-key. Am I still interested in the creepy supernatural cases? Hell yes. Do I show that interest? Not anymore. Do my best to hide it, actually. I can't tell you how many times I've nearly been spotted sneaking an intriguing case file back into someone's file cabinet. I still try to keep an eye on Angel and his crew, but I do it during my off-duty hours.
If there's something you want to do badly enough, you'll find a way to do it below the radar. That's what I've learned.
It's faded like everything else at the station. Some days it just gets to me. The cookie-cutter sameness of everyone here -- the unwillingness to see anything that isn't straight up black and white. Every morning as I'm scrubbing dried coffee-cup rings left from whoever used my desk the shift before, I wonder: do I really want to keep doing this? I thought the world had ended when I was put on leave, because being a cop was the only thing I knew. It seemed like a disgrace to Dad's memory for me to fail at it.
Now that I've been reinstated, though, I've learned how to stay low-key. Am I still interested in the creepy supernatural cases? Hell yes. Do I show that interest? Not anymore. Do my best to hide it, actually. I can't tell you how many times I've nearly been spotted sneaking an intriguing case file back into someone's file cabinet. I still try to keep an eye on Angel and his crew, but I do it during my off-duty hours.
If there's something you want to do badly enough, you'll find a way to do it below the radar. That's what I've learned.