The 5 stages of drunkeness
Message: 5 Stages of Drunkeness
Stage 1 - *SMART* :
This is when you suddenly become an expert on
every subject in the known Universe. You know you
know everything and want to pass on your
knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this stage
you are always RIGHT. And of course the person
you are talking to is very WRONG. This makes for
an interesting argument when both parties are
SMART.
Stage 2 - *GOOD LOOKING* :
This is when you realize that you are the BEST
LOOKING person in the entire bar and that people
fancy you. You can go up to a perfect stranger
knowing they fancy you and really want to talk to
you. Bear in mind that you are still SMART, so you
can talk to this person about any subject under the
sun.
Stage 3 - *RICH*:
This is when you suddenly become the richest
person in the world. You can buy drinks for the
entire bar because you have an armored truck full
of money parked behind the bar. You can also
make bets at this stage, because of course, you
are still SMART, so naturally you win all your bets.
It doesn't matter how much you bet 'cos you are
RICH. You will also buy drinks for everyone that
you fancy, because now you are the BEST
LOOKING person in the world.
Stage 4 - *BULLET PROOF*:
You are now ready to pick fights with anyone and
everyone especially those with whom you have
been betting or arguing. This is because nothing
can hurt you. At this point you can also go up to
the partners of the people who you fancy and
challenge to a battle of wits or money. You have no
fear of losing this battle because you are SMART,
you are RICH and hell, you're BETTER LOOKING
than they are anyway!
Stage 5 - *INVISIBLE*:
This is the Final Stage of Drunkenness. At this
point you can do anything because NO ONE CAN
SEE YOU. You dance on a table to impress the
people who you fancy because the rest of the
people in the room cannot see you. You are also
invisible to the person who wants to fight you. You
can walk through the street singing at the top of
your lungs because no one can see or hear you
and because you're still SMART you know all the
words.
Stage 1 - *SMART* :
This is when you suddenly become an expert on
every subject in the known Universe. You know you
know everything and want to pass on your
knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this stage
you are always RIGHT. And of course the person
you are talking to is very WRONG. This makes for
an interesting argument when both parties are
SMART.
Stage 2 - *GOOD LOOKING* :
This is when you realize that you are the BEST
LOOKING person in the entire bar and that people
fancy you. You can go up to a perfect stranger
knowing they fancy you and really want to talk to
you. Bear in mind that you are still SMART, so you
can talk to this person about any subject under the
sun.
Stage 3 - *RICH*:
This is when you suddenly become the richest
person in the world. You can buy drinks for the
entire bar because you have an armored truck full
of money parked behind the bar. You can also
make bets at this stage, because of course, you
are still SMART, so naturally you win all your bets.
It doesn't matter how much you bet 'cos you are
RICH. You will also buy drinks for everyone that
you fancy, because now you are the BEST
LOOKING person in the world.
Stage 4 - *BULLET PROOF*:
You are now ready to pick fights with anyone and
everyone especially those with whom you have
been betting or arguing. This is because nothing
can hurt you. At this point you can also go up to
the partners of the people who you fancy and
challenge to a battle of wits or money. You have no
fear of losing this battle because you are SMART,
you are RICH and hell, you're BETTER LOOKING
than they are anyway!
Stage 5 - *INVISIBLE*:
This is the Final Stage of Drunkenness. At this
point you can do anything because NO ONE CAN
SEE YOU. You dance on a table to impress the
people who you fancy because the rest of the
people in the room cannot see you. You are also
invisible to the person who wants to fight you. You
can walk through the street singing at the top of
your lungs because no one can see or hear you
and because you're still SMART you know all the
words.