(no subject)
you'd think four months later i would at least stop being sad. i can't seem to stop. i don't really understand what is going on anymore... i don't understand where I stand, and I don't know what is truth and what is just guilt or something. and the rest of it, i can't even seem to categorize. is the behavior a clue or is it someone else or is it just sheer confusion... I don't know. Four months... four... so when do i stop? when i want to? when will i want to? cuz up til now i still want to be somewhere else... some time else.. and i miss those times soo much that just remembering them i want to cry because i think they are stored somewhere and i used to have the password but i lost it, and the problem with that is knowing that i am supposed to be able to get there but i can't remember how and the only answer IT will give me is: "not everything is supposed to be immediately gratified... just wait and when it is time for you to have the password it will reappear.."
does life reeally work that way?
does life reeally work that way?