Here it comes....
Two weeks from yesterday I'll be in Maine...my apt will be empty, all my worldly belongings will be in boxes to remain in my dad's basement for the next 2 years, and the 'few' clothes I have left will be in suitcases in my grandparents' spare bedroom. 2 weeks from Friday I'll be in an airport, drinking with new coworkers and preparing for a flight to London and then on to the UAE.
I called Jeff last night...I'm not really sure why. I just felt like I needed to. He asked if I was getting excited and I confessed my nervousness, the sadness of leaving my friends, etc. I mean, yes, I am SO excited. But it's a crazy cycle to be in...excited, nervous, sad, crying, happy, laughing, excited, etc. Talking to him also made me kind of feel at peace with the whole situation with him. I know he's in a decent place now. I've said everything I've been wanting to say for 2 years. I'll probably always love him, but I think I'm also in a really good place with it now, too.
I faced the fact that I never really made friends down here. I mean, I get along with most of the girls I work with. I even hang out with a few of them on a semi-regular basis. But truth is, I spend almost all of my free time driving to Portland to see my fam and friends. I mean, I justify it now b/c I'm leaving and want to spend time with them. And I justified it last summer by saying I had 4 day weekends and needed mini vacations. It strikes me as weird, b/c I didn't do that in college....I stayed in Orono every weekend I could, didn't even go home until fall break, didn't hang out with my high school friends that were up there...I went out and made new friends. So I guess I know I can do it. I'm just a little worried with the UAE...have I forgotten how to make new friends? Plus, my roommates are already friends with each other and requested to live together...and I just got thrown in with them...which makes me a little uneasy.
I think the biggest thing that interrupts my packing progress is that I always manage to come across a picture, or a note, or memorabilia from one of our adventures or parties and it makes me miss them so much. Right now they're just a couple hours away. Soon they'll be 1/2 way around the WORLD. A 10-12 hour difference, an 18 hour flight. I think the hardest thing will be seeing them upload photo albums of recent events that I'm not there for. I mean, I know that's dumb b/c I'm going to be vacationing around the world and having experiences that other people only dream of. I just wish they could be there, too. I guess mostly I hope that things aren't all that different when I come back.
I called Jeff last night...I'm not really sure why. I just felt like I needed to. He asked if I was getting excited and I confessed my nervousness, the sadness of leaving my friends, etc. I mean, yes, I am SO excited. But it's a crazy cycle to be in...excited, nervous, sad, crying, happy, laughing, excited, etc. Talking to him also made me kind of feel at peace with the whole situation with him. I know he's in a decent place now. I've said everything I've been wanting to say for 2 years. I'll probably always love him, but I think I'm also in a really good place with it now, too.
I faced the fact that I never really made friends down here. I mean, I get along with most of the girls I work with. I even hang out with a few of them on a semi-regular basis. But truth is, I spend almost all of my free time driving to Portland to see my fam and friends. I mean, I justify it now b/c I'm leaving and want to spend time with them. And I justified it last summer by saying I had 4 day weekends and needed mini vacations. It strikes me as weird, b/c I didn't do that in college....I stayed in Orono every weekend I could, didn't even go home until fall break, didn't hang out with my high school friends that were up there...I went out and made new friends. So I guess I know I can do it. I'm just a little worried with the UAE...have I forgotten how to make new friends? Plus, my roommates are already friends with each other and requested to live together...and I just got thrown in with them...which makes me a little uneasy.
I think the biggest thing that interrupts my packing progress is that I always manage to come across a picture, or a note, or memorabilia from one of our adventures or parties and it makes me miss them so much. Right now they're just a couple hours away. Soon they'll be 1/2 way around the WORLD. A 10-12 hour difference, an 18 hour flight. I think the hardest thing will be seeing them upload photo albums of recent events that I'm not there for. I mean, I know that's dumb b/c I'm going to be vacationing around the world and having experiences that other people only dream of. I just wish they could be there, too. I guess mostly I hope that things aren't all that different when I come back.