commisurating.
I didnt sleep much last night. I kinda had a lot on my mind... Its wierd.. I kinda got to thinking and a bunch of random thoughts poped into my head. I started thinking like how much I was sick of being 16 and that 17 is a good change. I dont even know where that came from...
but eventually I did fall asleep and I had the wierdest dream. I rarely dream and when I do its just really wierd but really realistic. It almost seems like real life but its just a dream... I dunno if anyone else is like that or whatever... but anyways my dream
I dreamed that someone was calling my name but I didnt recognize it as my own. almost as if it wasnt my name at all. I never really liked my name... and I have a little bit of a speech impediment so sometimes when I say it it doesnt sound right.... its wierd. but I dreamt I had a different name but I dont remember what it was... But when I woke up I started thinking about saul/paul. how something drastic happened and he basically became a different person and didnt even recognize saul as his own name anymore. I dont know if God is trying to tell me something or what...
I keep thinking of the vision I had over the summer. it completely flipped my life upside down and Im about the exact opposite of what I was last year and 2 years ago. I mean I still struggle with some of the stuff I used to. I think I will for a long time.... well obviously I will.
sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I didnt go to that camp, if I never had my vision....
I dont think I would be the same person I am today. I dont even think I would be going to U-turn or any church for that matter. I wouldnt know half my friends.
my life would probably be in the gutter right now.
hmm...
I remember that night.
I mean how could I forget?
I was sweating and shaking
crying tears of joy and anguish
my heart was naked in front of us both.
I saw it was cold and hard as steel.
you asked me for it.
it meant nothing to me now so I gave it to you.
you placed hot coals on it.
burning through with life.
warming my soul.
easing my pain.
even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
-psalm 23:4
but eventually I did fall asleep and I had the wierdest dream. I rarely dream and when I do its just really wierd but really realistic. It almost seems like real life but its just a dream... I dunno if anyone else is like that or whatever... but anyways my dream
I dreamed that someone was calling my name but I didnt recognize it as my own. almost as if it wasnt my name at all. I never really liked my name... and I have a little bit of a speech impediment so sometimes when I say it it doesnt sound right.... its wierd. but I dreamt I had a different name but I dont remember what it was... But when I woke up I started thinking about saul/paul. how something drastic happened and he basically became a different person and didnt even recognize saul as his own name anymore. I dont know if God is trying to tell me something or what...
I keep thinking of the vision I had over the summer. it completely flipped my life upside down and Im about the exact opposite of what I was last year and 2 years ago. I mean I still struggle with some of the stuff I used to. I think I will for a long time.... well obviously I will.
sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I didnt go to that camp, if I never had my vision....
I dont think I would be the same person I am today. I dont even think I would be going to U-turn or any church for that matter. I wouldnt know half my friends.
my life would probably be in the gutter right now.
hmm...
I remember that night.
I mean how could I forget?
I was sweating and shaking
crying tears of joy and anguish
my heart was naked in front of us both.
I saw it was cold and hard as steel.
you asked me for it.
it meant nothing to me now so I gave it to you.
you placed hot coals on it.
burning through with life.
warming my soul.
easing my pain.
even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
-psalm 23:4