A Wee Story - Stuck on You by GW & Ll
This is a bad, wicked, naughty story that deserves to be punished! It was born of a trans-Atlantic telephone call, an exchange of a picture and a demand from marigoldg to have it done by morning!
GW wrote the script - I converted it into a story - the rest is… well you can see for yourselves what the rest is (or isn't).
I believe the original picture belongs to Thalassa and Annie B, so credit and blame to them in equal parts.
Oh and before you read, you do have to look at the picture - I'm sorry, I know it's difficult, but it won't work if you don't. Now take a good long look and then read on…
Stuck on You
By grey_wonderer
With interference from llinos
"Meriadoc, son of Saradoc, as your King I insist that you do as I command." Éomer spoke through gritted teeth, but Merry could tell he was serious.
"But, my Lord, you do know that you put me in a most compromising position, do you not?" Merry was nervous and uncertain but determined not to give way.
"I? I place you in such a position? Éomer's voice was angry and stern. "I think not, Master Holdwine. "It is you who compromises me. As your King I must insist that you do as I have ordered. I shall not allow this to pass."
"Please my Lord," Merry shivered slightly. "I beg you to reconsider. It will not happen again."
"Then we are agreed?" In spite of his words, Éomer's tone did not soften.
"I agree that it must be resolved and I agree that I must face this. I cannot agree to the action that you have ordered. Flogging is not something hobbits are accustomed to."
"What then would you have me do?" Éomer sighed deeply, staring at the top of Merry’s head.
"Leave it to me, my Lord. I shall make quite certain that he regrets his actions," Merry too sighed. "If we are ever able to free ourselves from this mess."
"I have done battle with many perfidious foes," Éomer growled. "But never have I known such treachery as this!"
"I did warn you, My Lord, not to pat him on the head and call him lad," Merry winced at both the physical and social discomfort. "He reacts badly to such attention." Merry decided it was not the moment to point out that Pippin was in fact a year older than Éomer.
"I am a King!" Éomer stormed. "He cannot begin to understand the forces at my command. I could have him slain for putting glue in my bath oil!"
"If I hadn’t tripped coming out of my own bath and fallen against you then his jest would merely have glued you to your towel or a bench or some other harmless object." Merry tried futilely once more to pull away. "I am certain that Pippin didn’t mean for this to happen."
It was small comfort, but Merry tried vainly to keep a tiny hope that it had not been intended for him. The skin on Merry’s cheek was glued firmly to Lord Éomer's chest so he could not look at his King but could easily imagine the look on his face. He was grateful for the towel that Lord Éomer was wearing about his waist or he might have been looking at far too much of His Royal Highness.
"His intentions matter little to me just now," Éomer's tone softened to reflect the awkwardness he was actually feeling. "What matters is how we are to resolve our rather nasty predicament without calling for assistance. We cannot be seen like this by anyone!"
"Are you certain that it was Pippin who put the glue into your bathing oil?" Merry knew he was plucking at straws.
"This is surely a trick of your folk," Éomer's ire was stirred once more. "No subject of Rohan would dare such as this!"
"Then you didn’t actually see him?" Merry asked hopefully.
"If I had seen someone put something into my bath oil," Éomer snorted in derision, "then do you think I would have used it?"
"I suppose not." Merry sighed, for he suspected his King was correct, but old habits linger and pleading his younger cousin's case was second nature to the hobbit. "But if you didn’t see Pippin do this then how do you know that he is to blame?"
"Is it not plain to you? Éomer reasoned. "Do you not see that this action taken upon the person of the High King of Rohan must be the action of one who is not loyal to me? None of my people would dare to do such a disrespectful thing as this! This is not the work of any of my people and unless you are suggesting that Lord Aragorn or Prince Legolas would do this then your cousin is the only other visitor here at present. Peregrin Took will pay for this outrage!"
From her hiding place in an empty stall, Éowyn giggled softly and smiled. "No, my Lord." She rehearsed her speech mentally. "None of your people would dare, but your sister would. I am sorry that my dear shield brother, Meriadoc had to become involved but may this teach you that I am not at your beck and call. Last night when you ordered me from the room as you spoke business with Lord Aragorn, you did so in a manner that one might use with an errant child."
Éowyn snorted a suppressed laugh as she watched her brother's discomfiture. "I will not allow Peregrin Took to take the blame for this but I will allow you to squirm for a while longer before rescuing you."
She peered over the edge of the stall at her brother who was trying not to touch poor Meriadoc in any way and smiled an unmaidenly evil smile. "Just a few minutes more…"
THE END
(as far as I know)
GW wrote the script - I converted it into a story - the rest is… well you can see for yourselves what the rest is (or isn't).
I believe the original picture belongs to Thalassa and Annie B, so credit and blame to them in equal parts.
Oh and before you read, you do have to look at the picture - I'm sorry, I know it's difficult, but it won't work if you don't. Now take a good long look and then read on…
Stuck on You
By grey_wonderer
With interference from llinos
"Meriadoc, son of Saradoc, as your King I insist that you do as I command." Éomer spoke through gritted teeth, but Merry could tell he was serious.
"But, my Lord, you do know that you put me in a most compromising position, do you not?" Merry was nervous and uncertain but determined not to give way.
"I? I place you in such a position? Éomer's voice was angry and stern. "I think not, Master Holdwine. "It is you who compromises me. As your King I must insist that you do as I have ordered. I shall not allow this to pass."
"Please my Lord," Merry shivered slightly. "I beg you to reconsider. It will not happen again."
"Then we are agreed?" In spite of his words, Éomer's tone did not soften.
"I agree that it must be resolved and I agree that I must face this. I cannot agree to the action that you have ordered. Flogging is not something hobbits are accustomed to."
"What then would you have me do?" Éomer sighed deeply, staring at the top of Merry’s head.
"Leave it to me, my Lord. I shall make quite certain that he regrets his actions," Merry too sighed. "If we are ever able to free ourselves from this mess."
"I have done battle with many perfidious foes," Éomer growled. "But never have I known such treachery as this!"
"I did warn you, My Lord, not to pat him on the head and call him lad," Merry winced at both the physical and social discomfort. "He reacts badly to such attention." Merry decided it was not the moment to point out that Pippin was in fact a year older than Éomer.
"I am a King!" Éomer stormed. "He cannot begin to understand the forces at my command. I could have him slain for putting glue in my bath oil!"
"If I hadn’t tripped coming out of my own bath and fallen against you then his jest would merely have glued you to your towel or a bench or some other harmless object." Merry tried futilely once more to pull away. "I am certain that Pippin didn’t mean for this to happen."
It was small comfort, but Merry tried vainly to keep a tiny hope that it had not been intended for him. The skin on Merry’s cheek was glued firmly to Lord Éomer's chest so he could not look at his King but could easily imagine the look on his face. He was grateful for the towel that Lord Éomer was wearing about his waist or he might have been looking at far too much of His Royal Highness.
"His intentions matter little to me just now," Éomer's tone softened to reflect the awkwardness he was actually feeling. "What matters is how we are to resolve our rather nasty predicament without calling for assistance. We cannot be seen like this by anyone!"
"Are you certain that it was Pippin who put the glue into your bathing oil?" Merry knew he was plucking at straws.
"This is surely a trick of your folk," Éomer's ire was stirred once more. "No subject of Rohan would dare such as this!"
"Then you didn’t actually see him?" Merry asked hopefully.
"If I had seen someone put something into my bath oil," Éomer snorted in derision, "then do you think I would have used it?"
"I suppose not." Merry sighed, for he suspected his King was correct, but old habits linger and pleading his younger cousin's case was second nature to the hobbit. "But if you didn’t see Pippin do this then how do you know that he is to blame?"
"Is it not plain to you? Éomer reasoned. "Do you not see that this action taken upon the person of the High King of Rohan must be the action of one who is not loyal to me? None of my people would dare to do such a disrespectful thing as this! This is not the work of any of my people and unless you are suggesting that Lord Aragorn or Prince Legolas would do this then your cousin is the only other visitor here at present. Peregrin Took will pay for this outrage!"
From her hiding place in an empty stall, Éowyn giggled softly and smiled. "No, my Lord." She rehearsed her speech mentally. "None of your people would dare, but your sister would. I am sorry that my dear shield brother, Meriadoc had to become involved but may this teach you that I am not at your beck and call. Last night when you ordered me from the room as you spoke business with Lord Aragorn, you did so in a manner that one might use with an errant child."
Éowyn snorted a suppressed laugh as she watched her brother's discomfiture. "I will not allow Peregrin Took to take the blame for this but I will allow you to squirm for a while longer before rescuing you."
She peered over the edge of the stall at her brother who was trying not to touch poor Meriadoc in any way and smiled an unmaidenly evil smile. "Just a few minutes more…"
THE END
(as far as I know)