would you rather appear to be three feet to the left of where you really are or
not exist on december 18 every year?
would you rather have a unique verereal disease where whenever you kiss someone they transform into a japanese soldier who thinks the war is still on or have the inability to distinguish between the taste of mint and the concept of increasing?
would you rather when asked where you come from always answer "probably the creation of some insane wizard" or
be incessantly preoccupied with the whereabouts of the muffin man
would you rather have a purple cloud of dust appear when you flatulate or have a nervous compulsion whereupon meeting the parents of a date of spouse you say quite happily "hello how are you? give me the salmon or i will destroy you"
would you rather have to always answer the phone with "i am the vindicator of the damned" or have a deep seated insecurity that causes you to refer to yourself as "the ambassador" as in "the ambassador would like some more pie"
heres my new life obsession: getting a law passed making the week 8 days long. work monday tuesday, break wednesday, work thursday friday and tomday (the newest one) and then weekend. repeat. brilliant 7 day weeks blow and are pointless.
and kungfu. oh my fucking god that was the most RIDICULOUS thing EVER. this is how we should solve problems, by breaking out into fights anytime we don't see eye to eye with eachother.