(no subject)
I'm really excited to go see Marilyn this weekend. And so-kal......buuttt.... i hate going home to saginaw its so depressing....actually no. only one thing depresses me, and its the stupid rumors that i can never escape from. everyone in saginaw still looks at me funny- well his friends at least. why cant i be known as lisa instead of known as the stupid rumors that get spread around for no damn reason.
we were becoming good friends again and you know we were. then you had to ruin everything by over exaggerating on something that was never true in the first place. for anyone who does read my live journal.....no i did not show up at brandons house at 5:30 in the morning after he got done with a floorset from american eagle...and no im not crazy, psycho, or whatever else he may lie about....
was i not myself this past summer?? NO i wasnt myself, you could say i was heartbroken and a little on the obsessive side, but definately not psycho or crazy....and brandon didnt even have a job at american eagle when all of that went on during that time.....so can you see how that might piss me off???
but yes, i did go over to brandons house because we BOTH wanted to see each other. and for some damn reason he has a hard time letting people know how he still loved me, and to know that no one has any idea what was expressed between us really sucks because he was playing me for a fool all this time...telling his friends that im psycho and then the next day call me up or kiss me... oops did i say something i wasnt supposed to??? well i dont care its about time everyone knows that we were still "together" although we werent "together"- if ya know what i mean
or maybe its because his stupid senior friends didnt think it was "HEALTHY" , well i guess they're having it their way brandon, i guess you all won him, because i GAVE UP....just know that how i felt that night when you're friends answered the phone and made me feel like a complete ass was something i never thought id feel again.... and to hear you sitting there not saying anything to stick up for me hurt the most....but it sure did change things and you have them to thank for it.
on a happier note....i found an amazing guy....things are just going really slow right now. :)
now i must take a bath and start my project.....yay for then end of finals soon.
love ya g2g bye,
lisa