Man, being nice still gets you no where.
So, here's some really good news. But it's also kind of depressing in an ironic sense.
As of March 13th, 2009 I am finally a high school graduate. Not that anyone cares. I didn't exactly get the congratulations from all of my friends. Or anyone really.
I gotta say though, it was funny how it happened. Which is why I'm writing right now.
So there's this girl lexa at my school. She's a real great friend of mine. It was the first time that she called me and we were face-to-face outside of school. She came over to get something to eat and we ended up going to 3rd period really late. I figured it was just a regular day. I pounded away at my work as fast as I could. The last 2 classes now, strictly AOP twice in a row. I remember seeing lexa there because she was in transition between changing classes. We talked about random things like the girl I liked cause she was so funny looking. Etc.
And my teacher (Ms. Smith) had told me that the counselor wanted to see me. I was kind of scared because I thought I was getting dropped from school again. Believe me, it's a real gut-sinking feeling!!!
So she made me run some errands and thankfully I had completely forgotten about going to the office. Upon completing my errands I had suddenly remembered.
Like a solid brick-sized dose of reality to the face. I was really scared to walk in there. I kind of gathered myself together and walked right in. Ms. Davis greeted my happily, "Danny!!!! I'm so glad that you came to school today. We here in the office have some pretty interesting news for you."
"Yep, Danny. Good news is you are almost done with school, but Ms. Taylor (principal) says your attendance isn't good enough. So we're sending you to the adult school. Now don't worry though, you'll only be there 2 months maximum. You juist need to earn your math credits and you'll finally have your diploma."
Haha, sike. That's what I was honestly expecting. But no, they had told me they were snooping around my records and found some credit I never got from one of my online classes. They said it was from my original senior year (07). So this entire time I could've been out of school since like mid-november. What a bummer it was to me.
Then again though, I couldn't exactly complain cause I sort of went into schock upon hearing the principle say "Congratulations Danny! You did it! You're done!"
I hadn't felt that type of joy in years to be really honest.
I went home that day and kind of looked back on my entire high school time. It wasn't exactly as glorified as I had once believed. I realized I went through (and dealt with) a lot of things my friends didn't have to even think about. those billions of little things that always held me back.
The day today is April 5th.
I have been out of school for almost a month now.
To be completely honest, my years at brenkwitz were a lot better than my years back at hayward high.
Most will disagree with me, but you know what? Being on the other side of the rope, being done with school, isn't as good as the time spent slaving away at myself and wearing myself down to the bare of my bones and sanity at brenkwitz. I don't care how stupid this makes me sound, if I had the chance, I wouldn't change any of the decisions I made.
The point of this entry isn't really for amusement or anything. It's simply a reminder to myself. A reminder of the character I had built when all I knew was a hollow piece of myself thinking I needed friends and old friends and a girlfriend, and that best friend to make it through things.
I now know all you ever need is the will to complete something, and want it more than it is needed.
I'm excited to continue to college actually. I await those moments when I get to meet an entirely new person, a stranger. An unknown being whom I may have something or nothing in common.
I feel as though I'm not sounding like myself. Yet at the same time, I feel as if this is who I really am, but nobody can accept me. But I'll continue to be the way I am now. I'm a lot smarter and more mature than I once was.
If you read all this, serious thanks. Even more thans if you understand how I feel and have an idea of what a weird journey it's been.
Haha, well I guess the party is over. I'm off to go grab some water.
As of March 13th, 2009 I am finally a high school graduate. Not that anyone cares. I didn't exactly get the congratulations from all of my friends. Or anyone really.
I gotta say though, it was funny how it happened. Which is why I'm writing right now.
So there's this girl lexa at my school. She's a real great friend of mine. It was the first time that she called me and we were face-to-face outside of school. She came over to get something to eat and we ended up going to 3rd period really late. I figured it was just a regular day. I pounded away at my work as fast as I could. The last 2 classes now, strictly AOP twice in a row. I remember seeing lexa there because she was in transition between changing classes. We talked about random things like the girl I liked cause she was so funny looking. Etc.
And my teacher (Ms. Smith) had told me that the counselor wanted to see me. I was kind of scared because I thought I was getting dropped from school again. Believe me, it's a real gut-sinking feeling!!!
So she made me run some errands and thankfully I had completely forgotten about going to the office. Upon completing my errands I had suddenly remembered.
Like a solid brick-sized dose of reality to the face. I was really scared to walk in there. I kind of gathered myself together and walked right in. Ms. Davis greeted my happily, "Danny!!!! I'm so glad that you came to school today. We here in the office have some pretty interesting news for you."
"Yep, Danny. Good news is you are almost done with school, but Ms. Taylor (principal) says your attendance isn't good enough. So we're sending you to the adult school. Now don't worry though, you'll only be there 2 months maximum. You juist need to earn your math credits and you'll finally have your diploma."
Haha, sike. That's what I was honestly expecting. But no, they had told me they were snooping around my records and found some credit I never got from one of my online classes. They said it was from my original senior year (07). So this entire time I could've been out of school since like mid-november. What a bummer it was to me.
Then again though, I couldn't exactly complain cause I sort of went into schock upon hearing the principle say "Congratulations Danny! You did it! You're done!"
I hadn't felt that type of joy in years to be really honest.
I went home that day and kind of looked back on my entire high school time. It wasn't exactly as glorified as I had once believed. I realized I went through (and dealt with) a lot of things my friends didn't have to even think about. those billions of little things that always held me back.
The day today is April 5th.
I have been out of school for almost a month now.
To be completely honest, my years at brenkwitz were a lot better than my years back at hayward high.
Most will disagree with me, but you know what? Being on the other side of the rope, being done with school, isn't as good as the time spent slaving away at myself and wearing myself down to the bare of my bones and sanity at brenkwitz. I don't care how stupid this makes me sound, if I had the chance, I wouldn't change any of the decisions I made.
The point of this entry isn't really for amusement or anything. It's simply a reminder to myself. A reminder of the character I had built when all I knew was a hollow piece of myself thinking I needed friends and old friends and a girlfriend, and that best friend to make it through things.
I now know all you ever need is the will to complete something, and want it more than it is needed.
I'm excited to continue to college actually. I await those moments when I get to meet an entirely new person, a stranger. An unknown being whom I may have something or nothing in common.
I feel as though I'm not sounding like myself. Yet at the same time, I feel as if this is who I really am, but nobody can accept me. But I'll continue to be the way I am now. I'm a lot smarter and more mature than I once was.
If you read all this, serious thanks. Even more thans if you understand how I feel and have an idea of what a weird journey it's been.
Haha, well I guess the party is over. I'm off to go grab some water.