I don't think I've got my priorities right.
First off I wake up tired as fuck because I spent all of yesterday hanging out with friends and then staying out late because I didn't want to go home... because home is a shitpile and we still haven't decided on a place to buy. Then when I come back, I mess around on the computer for a while before finally falling to bed, dead tired.
Next morning, I'm panicked and even more tired. I've never felt so tired in my life, and I have class at 10. I wake up, and fall back asleep. Then I'm late. For an entire hour. Then I realize that I've bought the wrong notebook to class... the notebook without the assignment I was supposed to hand in on that day. Now I have to skip the lecture and re-do the assignment, but I run out of time and hand in what I could remember with a couple of questions missing, when I probably could have gotten at least a credit or distinction. Now I'm at pass. Fuck.
Worse. I should have just called off lunch with Grace today. She's lovely, but I was just so tired -- we walked quite a bit, and conversation was a bit stilted because tired tired tired By the time we got back the library had closed and I couldn't study there anymore. Then I got locked out. For three hours. Because I've forgotten to charge my phone the night before.
I could have prevented a lot of this. Probably by realizing that I can't juggle this much in my life, so I make less retard mistakes. Just... right now, I hate all of this. I hate how much I feel like I've fallen, I hate been so fucking poor and I'd really rather my life be a bit less shit, and at times like this, I feel like somewhat of a failure at life. I don't believe what my mum so kindly said about me being pretty much doomed to nothing, because I want to think that I have potential, but, you know. One wonders.
Ugh. Just when you think things couldn't be worse, HAHA NOPE.
Next morning, I'm panicked and even more tired. I've never felt so tired in my life, and I have class at 10. I wake up, and fall back asleep. Then I'm late. For an entire hour. Then I realize that I've bought the wrong notebook to class... the notebook without the assignment I was supposed to hand in on that day. Now I have to skip the lecture and re-do the assignment, but I run out of time and hand in what I could remember with a couple of questions missing, when I probably could have gotten at least a credit or distinction. Now I'm at pass. Fuck.
Worse. I should have just called off lunch with Grace today. She's lovely, but I was just so tired -- we walked quite a bit, and conversation was a bit stilted because tired tired tired By the time we got back the library had closed and I couldn't study there anymore. Then I got locked out. For three hours. Because I've forgotten to charge my phone the night before.
I could have prevented a lot of this. Probably by realizing that I can't juggle this much in my life, so I make less retard mistakes. Just... right now, I hate all of this. I hate how much I feel like I've fallen, I hate been so fucking poor and I'd really rather my life be a bit less shit, and at times like this, I feel like somewhat of a failure at life. I don't believe what my mum so kindly said about me being pretty much doomed to nothing, because I want to think that I have potential, but, you know. One wonders.
Ugh. Just when you think things couldn't be worse, HAHA NOPE.