Lets get to the nitty gritty
Hi,
I just found this group and you may all hate me but I'm about to shake things up a bit.
Just some general background: I was raised Baha'i in central Wisconsin. My adult life has led me on a wild journey as I search for the truth. I've spent years investigating almost every faith out there. Most of my time was actually checking out pagan faiths (no, not devil worship, most pagans don't even belive in the devil, it's suprisingly compatable with Baha'i beliefs). I was inactive for near ten years.
Lately I've sort of been called back to the faith. I found where I fit in the universe and found I didn't have deny my beliefs to be who I am and who I was meant to be, but there were some big reasons I left in the first place that I kind of have to reconcile. I don't think I ever stopped being Baha'i. When times are worst I still turn to the writings. I never stopped beleiving in Baha'u'llah. I never stopped seeing Abdul'baha in meditations and dreams. When people ask about Baha'is I still say 'We' instead of 'they'. So my heart and soul are telling me something.
My biggest problem is some of the interpretations on laws by the House. I'm just going to say it. I am completely and without a doubt pro-gay rights. I have too many gay friends. I can not look at a happy funtioning family and say they are going against God. I can not see the light in their souls shining like a beacon and think there is something wrong with who they are or what thyey do. I truly believe God made them the way that they are and I just can not believe that God would punish them for making them so.
The Kitabi-aqdas (sp?) says 'Boyism is strictly prohibited.' Thats it. No where else that I have ever found does it say anythhing about homosexuality. My own indipendant research revealed that the term Boyism refers to a practice where nobles would take a ten-14 year old boy as a lover. That is pedifilia, not homosexuality. It says nothing about the love between two adult men or two adult women. So I disagree with the House's interpretation about that.
But to be an active Baha'i I pretty much state I follow where the House leads. How do I reconcile that? I've heard speeches about how we are spiritual beings not sexual beings and sex and marriage are about children. Well then why does Baha'u'llah tell us that we need to find a mate that is both spiritually and physically attractive to us? You might as well just condem all gays to a life of celebacy.
If you want to pull out progressive revelation and say well the bible says its bad, that's not true either. At no time did Jesus, God, or any other messenger say anything at all about homosexuality. The Paul that was Saul, speaking as a man and not a messenger was the only person in the entire bible to condem homosexuality. So where is it? Where does God or a vessel of his say without refute that 'Thou shalt not be Gay'?
I am a very spiritual person and I love the faith. If you find it for me I will listen. But until then how do I reconcile this and still be an active Baha'i? Am I too doomed to solitary worship becuase I simply disagree?