(no subject)
yesterday i was asleep on the couch and woke up to the phone, the answering machine got it and it was jesi i ran to pick it up just as she hung up. i called her back like 5 times and no answer then like 3 mins later the phone rings and its jesi....she tells me that they have to let jason go....i get off the phone with her and just sit on the floor and cry for 15 mins. i got under control and when my mom got home i told her and lost it again, had to go pick up monica and go to my g-rents told monica and she just hugged me while i bawled again, told jessica later on that night and she just held me while i cried, talked with jesi on the phone and just cried with her on the phone.
when i talked with her she was writing the LJ journal that she did, she said that it had been almost 2 hours since the doctors said it would be about sixty mins. that he was on 5x the morphine they give little kids and he was still going....she said she would call me if anything happened and i havent heard from her, but i mean i should be the last thing on her mind right now and i understand.
i cant believe this is happening....it is so unfair, what did an innocent little baby do to deserve all of this? its just not fair at all. i just want to be with jesi and ricky but i cant right now, this is just.....i cant even put it into words how awful this all is......jesi i love you and i am so sorry that you have to go through this, NO ONE should have to go through this....
i hope the rest of you take a look at your lives, i know you all know how serious this is and i know you will all say how you know your lives arent bad compared to this and all that (and i am not talking about anyone in preticular because i havnt read anyones updates yet) but if your next entry goes right back into the self centered poor me's i feel very sorry for you, you need to wake up and get it.
when i talked with her she was writing the LJ journal that she did, she said that it had been almost 2 hours since the doctors said it would be about sixty mins. that he was on 5x the morphine they give little kids and he was still going....she said she would call me if anything happened and i havent heard from her, but i mean i should be the last thing on her mind right now and i understand.
i cant believe this is happening....it is so unfair, what did an innocent little baby do to deserve all of this? its just not fair at all. i just want to be with jesi and ricky but i cant right now, this is just.....i cant even put it into words how awful this all is......jesi i love you and i am so sorry that you have to go through this, NO ONE should have to go through this....
i hope the rest of you take a look at your lives, i know you all know how serious this is and i know you will all say how you know your lives arent bad compared to this and all that (and i am not talking about anyone in preticular because i havnt read anyones updates yet) but if your next entry goes right back into the self centered poor me's i feel very sorry for you, you need to wake up and get it.