(no subject)
Man oh man. Murphy O'Meyer. I have never spent so much time studying as I have this weekend. I'm really stressing about these tests. If I don't get at least a B on my Finance exam, I'm probably not going to pass the class and I'll have to take it over again. But if I get at least a B, even if it's just an 80, I have a chance at a C in the class. I just need a C- to pass the class and move on. God, I'm so fucking close to my degree and I've never had an obstacle like this before, and it's really making me question my ability to even get my degree. Maybe I've smoked so much pot, drank too much beer, or just spent too much time worrying about stupid relationship shit to succeed. What if I can't? I have no idea what I would do. I need this degree. I need to pass this class. I probably need to stop freaking out too, but what are you gonna do!?
I'm making this way more intense than it needs to be. But I hate it when someone asks "how are you doing in school?" and I can't answer honestly without wanting to jump off a damn bridge. I'm not doing well in school. This is the first time I've ever not done well in the history of my career as a student. It sucks, and it makes me sad. Part of me feels like I'm throwing my life away. The other part absolutely loves my life and doesn't want to own up to any of these responsibilities. That naughty side just wants me to try and skate by doing the absolute minimum - or slack for the majority of the time and see how far I can make it. Well, damn, I've made it pretty far.
Drama drama everywhere, and not a drop to drink?
Yeah, that about sums it up.
To you, I never say the right thing. I always screw things up, and I always come off looking like an asshole. I am an asshole. I don't understand myself, and I most certainly don't expect you to understand me. I'm sorry.
I'm saving up my money for a therapy sesh. I need to unload on some poor, unsuspecting sap. Hey, at least the fucker's getting paid! I think I just need someone to talk to that I can just be completely honest with, tell the whole story to, and not feel like they're going to judge me or gossip about me. A therapist is perfect, because I won't have to hang out with them on a regular basis, and they won't talk shit about me to anyone because they're legally obligated not to! Amazing! Plus, I really think my friends need a break from me being a big old mess. And who knows, maybe therapist dude/chick will have something insightful to say. Something life changing? Probably not. Whatevs.
I had this dream that I was a fortune teller. I can't tell if I was lucid dreaming, because everything in the dream happened in an orderly fashion and it was all to my liking. I'm not sure if it was a coincidence or if I was controlling the dream. Everything was purple, hazy, smokey - I was one of those crazy tarot card readers - like miss cleo, but totally legit. But - I saw things, I knew things. I could read people in and out, and though I couldn't necessarily see into the future, I saw how their actions and their energies would intertwine with the world's energies - and I saw how their life would play out. It was amazing. I think I am going to get back into my tarot. After I go to beauty school maybe I'll open up some crazy little shop where you can get your hair done and get a tarot reading. How siiiick would that be, right!? Maybe that's my purpose.
What's your purpose? What's my purpose? Whatever my purpose is, I'm pretty sure it has nothing to do with this piece of shit Finance class I'm taking.
I'm making this way more intense than it needs to be. But I hate it when someone asks "how are you doing in school?" and I can't answer honestly without wanting to jump off a damn bridge. I'm not doing well in school. This is the first time I've ever not done well in the history of my career as a student. It sucks, and it makes me sad. Part of me feels like I'm throwing my life away. The other part absolutely loves my life and doesn't want to own up to any of these responsibilities. That naughty side just wants me to try and skate by doing the absolute minimum - or slack for the majority of the time and see how far I can make it. Well, damn, I've made it pretty far.
Drama drama everywhere, and not a drop to drink?
Yeah, that about sums it up.
To you, I never say the right thing. I always screw things up, and I always come off looking like an asshole. I am an asshole. I don't understand myself, and I most certainly don't expect you to understand me. I'm sorry.
I'm saving up my money for a therapy sesh. I need to unload on some poor, unsuspecting sap. Hey, at least the fucker's getting paid! I think I just need someone to talk to that I can just be completely honest with, tell the whole story to, and not feel like they're going to judge me or gossip about me. A therapist is perfect, because I won't have to hang out with them on a regular basis, and they won't talk shit about me to anyone because they're legally obligated not to! Amazing! Plus, I really think my friends need a break from me being a big old mess. And who knows, maybe therapist dude/chick will have something insightful to say. Something life changing? Probably not. Whatevs.
I had this dream that I was a fortune teller. I can't tell if I was lucid dreaming, because everything in the dream happened in an orderly fashion and it was all to my liking. I'm not sure if it was a coincidence or if I was controlling the dream. Everything was purple, hazy, smokey - I was one of those crazy tarot card readers - like miss cleo, but totally legit. But - I saw things, I knew things. I could read people in and out, and though I couldn't necessarily see into the future, I saw how their actions and their energies would intertwine with the world's energies - and I saw how their life would play out. It was amazing. I think I am going to get back into my tarot. After I go to beauty school maybe I'll open up some crazy little shop where you can get your hair done and get a tarot reading. How siiiick would that be, right!? Maybe that's my purpose.
What's your purpose? What's my purpose? Whatever my purpose is, I'm pretty sure it has nothing to do with this piece of shit Finance class I'm taking.