Everything we've said, everything we've done
Well, I tried with the IM. I couldn't keep it up for very long but it needed to be done. Love you santaman.
There seems to be a lot of drama happening among various people I know. A large chunk of it, coming from two different groups of people who have nothing to do with each other, centres round people locking/filtering entries, and also round other people reporting the contents of locked entries to the people they're locked against.
Mixed feelings. I did this once. I regret it now, even though I did it months after that particular drama had blown over and the person I passed the information to already knew the gist of it - it was just a matter of getting the exact wording right. It's some small compensation to know I didn't add any fuel to those flames.
In any case, I won't be doing it again. Sometimes it's hard to see exactly where the line falls between harmless gossip and breaking of a confidence; sometimes it's very hard to be Switzerland when people you care about are hurting each other - however, I've usually been fairly good at both. I've only really lapsed the once - and I won't again.
...and this is why I'm not in the habit of using friendslocks and filters, myself. Because nothing, nothing you put up on the Internet is ever really guaranteed to be private. My own defense against that is to keep everything public, and it's only failed me once: last May I was having an emotional outburst about someone who is prevented from reading LJ at work, and some dear, kind, thoughtful soul emailed him a quote from it out of context. Funny how their thoughtfulness didn't extend to emailing him any one of a dozen entries in which I spoke warmly and enthusiastically about that person, isn't it?
I've tried to resist speculating too much about the anonymous shit-stirrer's identity, because, even though s/he utterly failed to damage one of the best online relationships I've ever had, it shook me then and, nearly a year later, it still disturbs me to think that someone in a group of people I think of as a family-by-choice could go out of their way to try and hurt me. In the end, I decided forgetting it was a healthier option than entertaining dark suspicions about people I love - so, whoever the hell you were, I no longer care or want to know. But if you're reading this, you should consider getting help. Behaviour like that doesn't come out of a healthy psyche.
I was sure there was going to be a point to all that when I started writing it, but it seems to have come out without one, so I'll finish with a great life lesson from a movie:
"Be excellent to each other, and party on, dudes!"
There seems to be a lot of drama happening among various people I know. A large chunk of it, coming from two different groups of people who have nothing to do with each other, centres round people locking/filtering entries, and also round other people reporting the contents of locked entries to the people they're locked against.
Mixed feelings. I did this once. I regret it now, even though I did it months after that particular drama had blown over and the person I passed the information to already knew the gist of it - it was just a matter of getting the exact wording right. It's some small compensation to know I didn't add any fuel to those flames.
In any case, I won't be doing it again. Sometimes it's hard to see exactly where the line falls between harmless gossip and breaking of a confidence; sometimes it's very hard to be Switzerland when people you care about are hurting each other - however, I've usually been fairly good at both. I've only really lapsed the once - and I won't again.
...and this is why I'm not in the habit of using friendslocks and filters, myself. Because nothing, nothing you put up on the Internet is ever really guaranteed to be private. My own defense against that is to keep everything public, and it's only failed me once: last May I was having an emotional outburst about someone who is prevented from reading LJ at work, and some dear, kind, thoughtful soul emailed him a quote from it out of context. Funny how their thoughtfulness didn't extend to emailing him any one of a dozen entries in which I spoke warmly and enthusiastically about that person, isn't it?
I've tried to resist speculating too much about the anonymous shit-stirrer's identity, because, even though s/he utterly failed to damage one of the best online relationships I've ever had, it shook me then and, nearly a year later, it still disturbs me to think that someone in a group of people I think of as a family-by-choice could go out of their way to try and hurt me. In the end, I decided forgetting it was a healthier option than entertaining dark suspicions about people I love - so, whoever the hell you were, I no longer care or want to know. But if you're reading this, you should consider getting help. Behaviour like that doesn't come out of a healthy psyche.
I was sure there was going to be a point to all that when I started writing it, but it seems to have come out without one, so I'll finish with a great life lesson from a movie:
"Be excellent to each other, and party on, dudes!"