there is fiction in the space between
so i realized today that this year i will be eighteen. im excited yes, i can vote, get into clubs, gamble, and smoke. but something feels lost. i remember looking at myself mentally and physically say oh well, it will all be better once im older. i wasnt the only one to say it. now i know im not exactly past my prime..but it's not all better. i feel cheated. and stupid. like all my life i just thought id get older and all of my problems would be solved. like a fucking faerie tale. ok maybe i didnt actually think that would happen. i just thought it would feel..better.