(no subject)
If you asked your typical American citizen, "Name the time you were most proud to be an American?" Depending on how old they are they are most likely to go with one of the country’s most famous events such as the moon landing, Obama's election, or some random episode of 24 where Jack Bauer kicked some fucking terrorist ass. Bros will undoubtedly point to another groundbreaking moment. While supporters chanted "Yes We Did," when Obama took office, it's a little known fact that, much like everything else, they stole that shit from bros. That's right, it was about one year ago tonight when bros everywhere let out a sigh of relief as barriers were finally knocked down and that glass ceiling which had plagued us for years was finally shattered by one of the greatest bros of all time: Michael Phelps. As Phelps swam to his record breaking 8th Gold Medal, bros across the country fought back tears as all they could do was high five the shit out of one another. This one was for every bro out there who has stood up for their fellow bro trying to #23 drive home when everyone else said he was way too drunk. This one was for every bro who posed for a camera with their bong, only to have their parents see the pictures. This one was for bros. After years of the persecution and abuse one might expect a male in America aged 18 - 35 to receive, we finally caught a break. Chalk one up for the good guys. Michael Phelps - true American Hero and much more importantly - Bro King. Yes we did.
