So Long, Soldier (Chapter 2)
Title: So Long, Soldier
Author: Alisa
Pairing: Jalex
Rating: PG-13
POV: Alex
Summary: A young soldier is sent home after coming out while “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” is still in place. When he is reunited with an old friend, nothing may ever be the same again.
Disclaimer: This story is completely fictional. I do not own Alex or Jack.
Credit: Title to All Time Low
A/N: Bear with me, I'm just getting started.
The car ride home is the most awkward experience of my life and the most infuriating. I’m sitting in the backseat like a child coming home with mommy and daddy after a soccer game. I can’t help glaring as I watch Sasha reach for Jack’s free hand and lock her perfectly manicured fingers with his. She smiles at him with a look of almost forced love. Her ring sparkles briefly in the light of a passing car. This is my first time getting a glance at the thing, and I avert my eyes in an instant, the pain of it cuts too deep.
This all feels wrong.
First of all Jack’s driving, that’s reason enough for me to feel uneasy. Second, I should be sitting upfront with him, blasting bad rap and acting like an idiot with my best friend. But I guess my coming out isn’t the only thing that’s “changed” about me, I was a soldier, I suppose that means I have to be serious now. Jacks also changed, being engaged seems to have taken his toll on him, he’s too put together, too mature. He’s not himself around her, it’s like he has to hide for her to love him. But why would he? The Jack I knew was always a firm believer in being who you are and if anyone had a problem with that, fuck ‘em.
Third, Sasha, her name alone makes me shudder. I’ve always hated that name for one reason or another, mostly because the people who come with the name are usually stuck up assholes. I have no doubt in my mind telling me that this Sasha is any different.
I’m staying at Jack’s for the next few weeks, at least. Apparently my parents had no qualms in turning my bedroom into their own personal storage space and “aren’t prepared to accommodate me”. This, of course, is all bullshit and the more likely story is that my parents just aren’t ready to have their gay son tainting their carpet just yet. I really expected more from them. I’m not looking forward to staying with the lovers for an indefinite period of time either.
We drive uphill on a narrow, winding road, cramped with overgrown trees on either side. Our path is lit by nothing but the headlights of Jack’s 2007 Toyota Corolla, the only thing about my return home that has any semblance of familiarity. Jack pushes a button near his rearview mirror, opening a set of looming metal gates, hedges growing on either side. We pull up into the driveway of a big, Spanish-style house, surrounded by rosebushes, snapdragons, birds of paradise, and sprinkles of various other flowers. In the middle of the courtyard is a solitary palm tree that looks almost as alone as I feel. Oh palm tree, I have a feeling you and I are going to be spending a lot of time together.
As I step out of the car that feels like the only piece of home I have left, I look up at the house and I’m already lost. It’s so big, too big for only two, now three, people. Looks like Jack got rid of the old place, the place that held so many memories for the two of us. Of course he did.
“You moved?”
“Yeah Sash and I figured it was about time to get out of there, it was a little small.”
“Ha, yeah it was certainly… um… smaller. Hehe.” I struggle to maintain a cheery disposition.
“That it was. I couldn’t stand how cramped it was. No room for anything, it only fit one TV,” Sasha scoffs arrogantly.
“I mean, some could call it cozy…” Jack quickly responds in a useless attempt to conceal Sasha’s true colors. It’s almost like he’s afraid of her.
“Oh, Jack, please that house was a piece of shit and you know it.”
“Can you please just… not right now?”
“What? It was!”
“It wasn’t that bad.”
“For some blue collar scum.” What a bitch…
“Sasha…”
I can see where this is going and I know I have to say something to prevent it from escalating any further and to avoid hearing Sasha spew out any more insults about the house Jack and I used to love so much.
“Ahem. Well, I’m kind of tired the plane ride was awful. So if you could just point me in the direction of my room, that would be great.”
“Sorry, dude, follow me. Here let me take that for you.” Jack reaches for my bag but I can’t give it to him.
“No. Really, it’s fine.”
“Okay… well, your room’s this way.”
We head up the stairs, leaving Sascha behind. I hear her go into another room downstairs and slam the door. I’m not quite sure what that bitch has stuck up her ass, but whatever it is I don’t see myself getting used to her any time soon.
“Sorry about that…”
“About what?”
“She’s a bit overbearing at times, but she’s not always like that…”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I don’t want to talk about Sasha. I don’t want to think about her any longer than I have to.
“Yeah, well your just being nice, but I’ll take the hint.” He always knows what I’m thinking before I have to say anything, probably because we think the same way; which is why I wonder why he’s with her. “This is your room.”
He leads me into a room that makes me stop for a moment. I wonder if Sasha’s even aware of what he’s done to the place, what he’s really done. I look around and a smile creeps onto my face, before I know it I’m laughing and grinning like an idiot. Jack has turned my new room into almost an exact replica of my room before I left. Not like the room I had at my parents’ house. No, it looks just like my room at that cozy piece of shit Jack and I picked out together before I left, posters and all. He must have known how much I’d… miss it. Jack follows me in, closes the door, and stands behind me waiting to see my reaction.
“Do you like it?”
“Jack, this is…” I can hardly find the words to say, “Jack this is incredible, it’s… you didn’t have to do all of this for me.”
“Maybe I did it for both of us,” Jack says quietly.
“What’s that supposed to-” before I can finish my sentence, he wraps his long arms around my waist and rests his chin on my shoulder, his cheek touches mine. I feel a tear roll off of his face and onto my neck as he pulls me in tighter. His warm breath steams and collects on my skin. I want to collapse in his arms and scream; I feel my chest tighten as though a thousand ton weight has been dropped on it. I think if he lets go, I might just fall to pieces. Why is he doing this to me? Why is he torturing me like this?
“I didn’t know if you were ever coming back.” as those words reach me, it hits.
“Jack, how long has this room looked like this?”
“Almost two years now.” He still hasn’t let go of me and now I understand why. He didn’t do all of this for when I came back, he did it in case I never did.
I finally turn around to face him. I put a hand on his shoulder, as a friend, because that’s all I am to him; it’s all I can ever be. His down cast eyes shift up to meet mine, they’re swollen red with tears. I want to wipe them away, but something’s holding me back, a barrier I can’t breech. So I just squeeze his shoulder a little tighter and smile.
“Well, I came back and I’m not going anywhere, now.”