Here I am....
...Hm, somehow it's funnier when a gay Zorro says it. And if you know what i'm talking about, you're on my good list. So yeah. Here i am. My lovely friend Christine sent me a free code, and I'm a sucker for free things. Besides, i'm doing temp work now which generally means that you have time to kill. They claim they are going to give me something other than phones to do, but hey, i'm good with answering the phones, playing online and getting paid. Especially considering that I really don't know how much I'm capable of handling at this point, and i'm not really interested in pushing myself. One trip to the loony bin is QUITE enough for me, thanks. Nope. Right now i'm taking it a little easy, and getting my feet a little wet. Feels good to be out doing something again, though I wasn't entirely unhappy staying at home and doing my counted cross-stitch. But this is better, because i'm not about to get paid for doing cross-stitching. And despite not having to worry about rent or utilities, there are still bills to pay. After all, SOMEONE has to pay for my car and my car insurance.
So...yeah...here i am. Oh yeah. I said that already. But it bears repeating, because it's been a long way getting here. On January 17 I checked myself into the hospital psych ward for suicidal ideation (fancy way of saying it, ain't it?), self harm and general inability to function in the world. After a brief 5 day stay (thank you Aetna)during which i was diagnosed as having Borderline Personality Disorder, I was back at home, where i spent almost two months doing...NOTHING. Now that's good for mental health. Then i spent a month doing a daily therapy program, and i came out the other end ready to start approaching the world again, but i'm taking it slow. I doubt someone who almost drowned would jump right in the deep end, and i'm certainly not about to go anywhere near the deep end right now. I'm liable to go right off it if i do. So hey...here i am, having quit a well paying, upward bound 3 year job and re-entering the field of temping where the first assumption is that you are dumb as dirt. The upside of that is that it's REALLY easy to impress people coming in as a temp. The expectations are SOOOO low.
And if you're wondering why i'm willing to put such personal stuff up here in public, it's because none of this is something i'm embarassed about, and I'm not wallowing in my own self pity anymore. Sure, i spent some time doing that, and i'll have my days, but now that i know the demon, i'll just deal with it. Besides, if more people talked about it, maybe less people would be so embarassed about it.
Anyway, they finally gave me something else to do, so i'm off. (But you knew that)
So...yeah...here i am. Oh yeah. I said that already. But it bears repeating, because it's been a long way getting here. On January 17 I checked myself into the hospital psych ward for suicidal ideation (fancy way of saying it, ain't it?), self harm and general inability to function in the world. After a brief 5 day stay (thank you Aetna)during which i was diagnosed as having Borderline Personality Disorder, I was back at home, where i spent almost two months doing...NOTHING. Now that's good for mental health. Then i spent a month doing a daily therapy program, and i came out the other end ready to start approaching the world again, but i'm taking it slow. I doubt someone who almost drowned would jump right in the deep end, and i'm certainly not about to go anywhere near the deep end right now. I'm liable to go right off it if i do. So hey...here i am, having quit a well paying, upward bound 3 year job and re-entering the field of temping where the first assumption is that you are dumb as dirt. The upside of that is that it's REALLY easy to impress people coming in as a temp. The expectations are SOOOO low.
And if you're wondering why i'm willing to put such personal stuff up here in public, it's because none of this is something i'm embarassed about, and I'm not wallowing in my own self pity anymore. Sure, i spent some time doing that, and i'll have my days, but now that i know the demon, i'll just deal with it. Besides, if more people talked about it, maybe less people would be so embarassed about it.
Anyway, they finally gave me something else to do, so i'm off. (But you knew that)