What's in a name?......Everything!
I think that a name is a very important first impression creator. And its sad that one has no choice to exercise in the word that one adopts as one's own, as one's identity. I think people should wait for personalities, traits to appear before they name somebody as XYZ. Because more often than not, it may not fit. Imagine a vicious, loud Namrata or a timid and shy Rudra, or more closer to home, a non-singer Sangeetha.
Its unfair, growing up everybody expected tinkling bells, and dulcet tones to fall out of my mouth every time I opened it, instead were confronted by shrill, ear-irritating shrieks. I have lost count of the number of times, some obnoxious maami or maama have asked me, 'Ohoo....., Sangeetha - va...nalla peru...paatu paada therimo? Enga oru paatu paadi kaatu'. (Oho, so your name is Sangeetha, Nice name, come, let us hear you sing a song for us). And so for no fault of mine, I was expected to defend my title of "Sangeetha", every single time. It was as if people expected that I spend days honing and training my voice, to be worthy of my name.
I mean, what were my parents thinking, that I cried in dulcet notes and hence, I'd have a good voice? And so, in class 5, I found myself carted off to a carnatic vocal class, where we spent the better part of the evening (s)training our recalcitrant vocal chords into the semblance of a tune. All the while, my attention would be diverted towards the setting sun, ending moments of evening play time. Not to mention, that I now had another set of exams to prepare for and pass. And, of course, when the extended family found out that I knew (?) to sing, I was inundated with more requests than ever. In a typical tamil family, there is never a dearth of opportunties to sing and showcase your talent. If you are the kind of person who enjoys showcasing your voice in front of audiences, big and small, young and old, then being born in a tamil family should be your first ambition. From aarthi's, to kolu's, to kalyanams with the nalang's, there is never too long between succesive performances.
So, you can imagine my plight, I had to work very hard at making myself scarce before any of the maamis caught hold of me. I even had a grand-uncle who would tell me that he longed to hear me sing, and would give me anything I desired if I so obliged him. Since there was no escaping him, forever, I milked that situation to my advantage and wheedled a badminton racket out of him after my truncated performance, with my mom glowering in the background. Not to mention, that in addition to all of these humiliations, I had un-endearing nicknames, eg. 'keechu-moochu sundari' Because my voice was so 'keechu' they said....where they got the moochu and the sundari, I don't know!
Anyway, the plague that is my name, follows me to date, with people assuming that I 'like' to sing. Actually, I don't know anymore, if I do or don't. Its like somebody kept whispering, nay, shouting hoarsely, in my ears all through childhood and teenage years, I even tried, sincerely, a couple times to work at it and convinced myself that I enjoyed it. I probably still do, except I don't think I do, maybe for my own listening pleasure, never that of others though. I get cold sweats and shaky kneed if somebody asks me to sing. The thing also is that I don't have a voice that is sweet and high-pitched anymore, I sorta ruined it early in a fit of defiance, so I'm left with a voice that is part husky part shrill in places, and completely unsuitable for Indian music. So, there are not many 'shining' moments for me. Which is fine, because I don't much like to sing in front of audiences anyway. AND I sorely dislike people who keep singing like they are in front of an audience all the time. Like when we are playing antakshari and you have that lone voice, which keeps trying to veer the group back into the right sur and pitch while the rest of us are singing madly for the heck of it, like the lone voice that continues to sing verses long after you have stopped under one's breath though but just loud enough to deserve the, 'You have a nice voice' compliment, the lone voice that does not enjoy B-grade songs because they are 'all about screaming and never about singing'.
So, anyway, after a lot of pondering, one time, not too long ago, I asked my mom why she and my father had to name me, 'Sangeetha' and I told her what a big 'burden' it was that I was carrying (:P) And she replied, "Well, it was because we liked music so much, silly!". OH!!!! That clears a lot of things!! It has nothing to do with me, really, its just mostly a reminder of what my parents like. Which is sorta better than what I had thought - their (fallen) expectations! :P
Anyhow, so all of that, a lifetime of (mis)thought is in that name!!!! :P
Happy New Year!!!
New Year resolution: Do NOT obsess!!!!!
And
Learn Statistics!
Its unfair, growing up everybody expected tinkling bells, and dulcet tones to fall out of my mouth every time I opened it, instead were confronted by shrill, ear-irritating shrieks. I have lost count of the number of times, some obnoxious maami or maama have asked me, 'Ohoo....., Sangeetha - va...nalla peru...paatu paada therimo? Enga oru paatu paadi kaatu'. (Oho, so your name is Sangeetha, Nice name, come, let us hear you sing a song for us). And so for no fault of mine, I was expected to defend my title of "Sangeetha", every single time. It was as if people expected that I spend days honing and training my voice, to be worthy of my name.
I mean, what were my parents thinking, that I cried in dulcet notes and hence, I'd have a good voice? And so, in class 5, I found myself carted off to a carnatic vocal class, where we spent the better part of the evening (s)training our recalcitrant vocal chords into the semblance of a tune. All the while, my attention would be diverted towards the setting sun, ending moments of evening play time. Not to mention, that I now had another set of exams to prepare for and pass. And, of course, when the extended family found out that I knew (?) to sing, I was inundated with more requests than ever. In a typical tamil family, there is never a dearth of opportunties to sing and showcase your talent. If you are the kind of person who enjoys showcasing your voice in front of audiences, big and small, young and old, then being born in a tamil family should be your first ambition. From aarthi's, to kolu's, to kalyanams with the nalang's, there is never too long between succesive performances.
So, you can imagine my plight, I had to work very hard at making myself scarce before any of the maamis caught hold of me. I even had a grand-uncle who would tell me that he longed to hear me sing, and would give me anything I desired if I so obliged him. Since there was no escaping him, forever, I milked that situation to my advantage and wheedled a badminton racket out of him after my truncated performance, with my mom glowering in the background. Not to mention, that in addition to all of these humiliations, I had un-endearing nicknames, eg. 'keechu-moochu sundari' Because my voice was so 'keechu' they said....where they got the moochu and the sundari, I don't know!
Anyway, the plague that is my name, follows me to date, with people assuming that I 'like' to sing. Actually, I don't know anymore, if I do or don't. Its like somebody kept whispering, nay, shouting hoarsely, in my ears all through childhood and teenage years, I even tried, sincerely, a couple times to work at it and convinced myself that I enjoyed it. I probably still do, except I don't think I do, maybe for my own listening pleasure, never that of others though. I get cold sweats and shaky kneed if somebody asks me to sing. The thing also is that I don't have a voice that is sweet and high-pitched anymore, I sorta ruined it early in a fit of defiance, so I'm left with a voice that is part husky part shrill in places, and completely unsuitable for Indian music. So, there are not many 'shining' moments for me. Which is fine, because I don't much like to sing in front of audiences anyway. AND I sorely dislike people who keep singing like they are in front of an audience all the time. Like when we are playing antakshari and you have that lone voice, which keeps trying to veer the group back into the right sur and pitch while the rest of us are singing madly for the heck of it, like the lone voice that continues to sing verses long after you have stopped under one's breath though but just loud enough to deserve the, 'You have a nice voice' compliment, the lone voice that does not enjoy B-grade songs because they are 'all about screaming and never about singing'.
So, anyway, after a lot of pondering, one time, not too long ago, I asked my mom why she and my father had to name me, 'Sangeetha' and I told her what a big 'burden' it was that I was carrying (:P) And she replied, "Well, it was because we liked music so much, silly!". OH!!!! That clears a lot of things!! It has nothing to do with me, really, its just mostly a reminder of what my parents like. Which is sorta better than what I had thought - their (fallen) expectations! :P
Anyhow, so all of that, a lifetime of (mis)thought is in that name!!!! :P
Happy New Year!!!
New Year resolution: Do NOT obsess!!!!!
And
Learn Statistics!