(no subject)

Jan 29, 2006 23:00

yeah it still hurts. i dont know if by repeating every cliche "feel better about yourself" saying helps but its worth a shot. you win some, you lose some. i cant understand why im still dwelling on this one. maybe its because i thought it could have been different this time around. me and him, we have a connection damnit! something good would have flourished i just know it.
i have to get it through my fat head that there's nothing there and there will never be anything. i hate jorim, but we can be friends. it frustrates me, boys frustrate me.
i know its not right but i hope jorim got jealous of me and gabriel. even though there was nothing there.
bitch, i know. sigh.

gabriel and i bonded on our trip. i feel he's like an older brother to me now...it feels nice. the only downside is he didnt open up to me at all and, for once, i kind of did. im pretty sure i scared him. i like him he's a good person.

during the trip i got pulled over for speeding. first timer and it was scary and annoying because i had to piss badly. i was let off with a warning for having a valid excuse and admitting my wrong doing. i told the sheriff it was because i was trying to get to a gas station to use the toilet. it worked.

school begins tomorrow. i have to crash all my fucking classes. i hate everyone in my major. i feel like im back in high school and im in a "people suck" stage again. i want to move all over again. san francisco hipster kids are getting on my nerves. a lot.
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