Title: The Freudian Slip (8/15) (Part Three)
Author: Gess aka live_by_lyrics
Pairing: Jack Barakat/Alex Gaskarth
P.O.V.: third person omniscient, (slightly limited to Jack Barakat)
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: References to sensuous touching and psychiatric help.
Summary: An amateur psychoanalyst becomes enamoured with his latest patient.
Disclaimer: This
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Yes, this is the starting point for Gabe (and really anyone reading the story since that was the beginning of the anxiety attack) but it's in no way an improvement of what Gabe saw before. Its worse actually. Alex mentions he was constantly playing a role in his past, so no one actually knew about the 'bad stuff' until the entire band fell apart.
Ahaha, TFS is intended to make sense (at least eventually), so I'm super relieved that it's all starting to fit into place :D
Ohh yes! For every two steps they take forwards, there is going to be a step taken back. I'm afraid people assume because Alex has 'agreed' to let Jack in, that it'll be smooth sailing from this point on...no. Alex has been suffering from anxiety for a while now, and he's developed deviant ways to cope with it. Jack is going to have to push and prod to get Alex to admit he has a problem, let alone agree to address it. Though Gabe, Rian and Zack will all be helping along the way ;)
As for the reason why Alex agreed in the first place, because you're right to say that Jack had to get Alex to agree, it's kind of a repressed desire at this point. Yes, Alex admires Jack's persistence, ('little sod', your British euphemisms always make me laugh!) and he's clearly attracted to Jack (by Alex not knowing it was Jack in the costume and still wanting him, we have concrete proof that Alex does like Jack, that their initial encounter wasn't just Alex fooling around). But there is a part of Alex who is tired of living the way he does, that thinks that maybe he isn't 'normal' and that he doesn't in fact 'deserve this.' (He is constantly repeating that line in a pathetic attempt to make it true.)
He kind of has a mini revelation about in the lines: "He is so selfish, so utterly consumed in his own tragedy that he never considered that someone could save him." (*Which is why I used this line as the cut for this entry.)
By all means, put on the cap. I spent a good five minutes trying to type you a hint, but I'm afraid I'm paranoid of giving it away. Its really that cliché.
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Oh, so Alex has been playing this role for awhile? Would it be right to say the roll has changed before and after the band broke up? Or was Alex just better at hiding it whilst in the band? I was under the misimpression that the role Alex is now playing was due to the band breaking down.
Hehe. We can’t have everything becoming too easy for Jack. That wouldn’t be a test of this skills and knowledge. It would be silly for everything to be smooth sailing though. It would go against Alex’s whole characterization.
Right. Okay. Alex’s decision makes sense now. Haha. I take it you understood my euphemism? ☺ So that’s why Jack needed Halloween and the chance to wear a costume in order to ensure that Alex did like him and like you said, isn’t just fooling around with him.
It was a wonderful line and summarizes the whole chapter (and Alex’s thoughts on his lifestyle) pretty perfectly as this is the turning point in the story. Well one of many I’m sure.
Cliché? In that case… I’m thinking in the wrong area.
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Alex's character...is difficult. To be honest, I'm currently having a hard time trying to break him down and open up. That whole 'admitting you have a problem is the first step' is tricky seeing as a lot of people with anxiety disorders tend to keep it to themselves, and feel nervous talking about their issues...its such a paradox and if Alex didn't subconsciously like Jack/want to be saved, I don't think he would.
Ahaha, I looked it up to be sure. I've heard the term in a negative connotation before and figured you wouldn't be calling Jack a clump of grass. I love learning jargon :D
Mhm, cliché is the word that comes to mind. This whole story is very anti-cliché only to build up to this moment of utter cliché...it's a form of meta-fiction if you will.
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Ha, sounds like a hell of a paradox if you ask me. I guess Jack has the say the right words at the right time. In the hope that something triggers Alex's memory. I say hope, but I mean calculated, meticulous planning ;)
Hehe. Well I guess I provide some sort of service/purpose here.
I love that word. Meta-fiction (*goes to look up word) Ah, yeah. Okay. I think I know what you mean, it is a form but not exactly meta-fiction. If I'm understanding the literary term correctly.
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I guess meta-fiction is a loose term, in my French course we used it as 'when an author refers to the act of writing' such as when a character writes a letter, but then in English it had a more precise definition that was basically like the following:
"Fiction in which the author self-consciously alludes to the artificiality or literariness of a work by parodying or departing from novelistic conventions (esp. naturalism) and traditional narrative techniques"
So the whole issue of Alex/'you-don't-know-who' is when I as the author consciously employ a novelistic convention, (or rather, fan-fiction convention) for the sake of parodying it, proving it's artificiality, and eventually breaking past it.
But that's all I'm going to say! Ahah, I love the suspense of all this far too much to spoil it :)
*If you ever want to read an example of meta-fiction at its finest, I highly recommend John Barth's 'Lost in The Funhouse,' it's a short story that messes with the idea of narration and basic plot structure, it left my entire English lecture class of 300 mind-fucked beyond repair XD
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Ohh, Okay meta-fiction makes more sense to me now. I'm pretty sure you live on maintaing that high level of suspense, your a tricky author, playing her cards close to her chest. But I like it, keeps me on my toes.
*Takes mental note of book, so that she may read it during University.
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