Anymore these days
In the past few days i have been thinking a lot about a curtain subject that i wish i could just erase, but life doesn't work that way. i may be thankful for everything we had but yet i wish it would all go away. These past couple days i been there by a friends side talking with her and everything on that what i could possibly do for her in a simular subject. then all i can do is think about Lacy anymore. I just wish she would have made better dicisions in her life i know she she thinks the same way. I tried my best to give her everything and anything but that wasn't enough, lately i feel i may have given to much. I was asked by a few people to talk to her or even write her a letter maybe thinking i could get through to her but i gave up and now she is Married. I was afraid and plus i didn't know what to say to her, it's not i like i could say hey don't marry this spic, she is a big girl and she can make her own decisions. everyday i ask myself what can i do to make myself better, in the way for myself and her. I know a lot of people out htere just want me to forget and move on but it is harden then that. i can't forget about my past and i would never want to she was my first love. I wish i would have gotten the chance to talk to her before she made the ultimate decision she did, i may not have known what to say but i would have came up with something. Now it is to late she started a family without me.
Hearing about everyone elses problems make me think about her more and more everyday, I am not tryong to tell people to not talk to me so please don't stop. I feel this is something i have to get over by myself and it will take time. i am moving in the right direction, up and not down. I start school this winter which am very thankful for. All i can say is Med school be ready for Billy Wentzel. I don't plan on stopping my life for someone i just wish i could spend it with her by myside and through the rough years to come. But i know i can get through them with or without her.
I have some of the best friends a guy can ask for. Tiff you are my best friend and i hope you know that. i love every moment i have with you and that is no lie. you opened me up an brought me back to my senses. i hope i never lose you as a friend and nobdy comes in between are freindship. Sometimes i think about moving home just so i can be closer to you and everyone esle but i also love my job so sorry tiff. But please don't ever let anyone come between our friendship and if i do let someone come between us let me know. Tiff love you to death ( as a freind ) so don't get wierd on me. lol
Kristen you also have been a great freind to i am glad to have met you and be came your friend you have many of the same issues but thats fine with me just hope everything works out for the best.
For now i must get some sleep
Hearing about everyone elses problems make me think about her more and more everyday, I am not tryong to tell people to not talk to me so please don't stop. I feel this is something i have to get over by myself and it will take time. i am moving in the right direction, up and not down. I start school this winter which am very thankful for. All i can say is Med school be ready for Billy Wentzel. I don't plan on stopping my life for someone i just wish i could spend it with her by myside and through the rough years to come. But i know i can get through them with or without her.
I have some of the best friends a guy can ask for. Tiff you are my best friend and i hope you know that. i love every moment i have with you and that is no lie. you opened me up an brought me back to my senses. i hope i never lose you as a friend and nobdy comes in between are freindship. Sometimes i think about moving home just so i can be closer to you and everyone esle but i also love my job so sorry tiff. But please don't ever let anyone come between our friendship and if i do let someone come between us let me know. Tiff love you to death ( as a freind ) so don't get wierd on me. lol
Kristen you also have been a great freind to i am glad to have met you and be came your friend you have many of the same issues but thats fine with me just hope everything works out for the best.
For now i must get some sleep