who can dry these tears?
Losing Bradley will never make sense to me
I will never understand
I will never ever be the same
The crazy ideas in my mind never leave. I'm still waiting for him. Anything, absolutley anything, would make more sense to me than the truth.
...maybe he's in the CIA and had to fake his death?... maybe I'm on some sick reality show?... Maybe HE COULD HAVE LIVED...
That last one kills me the most. Why did he hold on for so long just to let go?
I'm so depressed, somedays are better than others I'll admit. But I've cried every day since he passed. I feel so sorry for myself, I can't hardly speak to his parents because it hurts ME. So maybe there was one empty chair in class on tuesday. But his family sits at a table everyday with oneless son, brother, friend. Their pain i can only imagine. Yet, I can't even take care of myself.
Too many pictures, songs, smells, memories take me back to him. I was so intrigued, he was so in love.
I was happy to find somebody who shared in my same passions.
We were firefighters together, we hiked and hugged. He ate so much! We were so competitive and motivated. He always smelled like lemons and his T-shirts were too soft. He had no idea how goregous he was. We fought over radio stations, and sang out loud. He taught me how to shoot. Killed me at pool. Matching blue eyes.
I loved who I was with him.
I miss who I was.
I miss him so much, and I've just now begun to accept that I always will.
I'm rebuilding my heart, piece by piece.
I'm still missing any motivation, i can hardly remember my aspirations, goals and dreams.
So much of me lived and died with him. How am i supposed to get that back?
Whoever said time heals is a god damn liar too. Over time, you just get numb. I don't think you can ever heal.
I will never understand
I will never ever be the same
The crazy ideas in my mind never leave. I'm still waiting for him. Anything, absolutley anything, would make more sense to me than the truth.
...maybe he's in the CIA and had to fake his death?... maybe I'm on some sick reality show?... Maybe HE COULD HAVE LIVED...
That last one kills me the most. Why did he hold on for so long just to let go?
I'm so depressed, somedays are better than others I'll admit. But I've cried every day since he passed. I feel so sorry for myself, I can't hardly speak to his parents because it hurts ME. So maybe there was one empty chair in class on tuesday. But his family sits at a table everyday with oneless son, brother, friend. Their pain i can only imagine. Yet, I can't even take care of myself.
Too many pictures, songs, smells, memories take me back to him. I was so intrigued, he was so in love.
I was happy to find somebody who shared in my same passions.
We were firefighters together, we hiked and hugged. He ate so much! We were so competitive and motivated. He always smelled like lemons and his T-shirts were too soft. He had no idea how goregous he was. We fought over radio stations, and sang out loud. He taught me how to shoot. Killed me at pool. Matching blue eyes.
I loved who I was with him.
I miss who I was.
I miss him so much, and I've just now begun to accept that I always will.
I'm rebuilding my heart, piece by piece.
I'm still missing any motivation, i can hardly remember my aspirations, goals and dreams.
So much of me lived and died with him. How am i supposed to get that back?
Whoever said time heals is a god damn liar too. Over time, you just get numb. I don't think you can ever heal.