(no subject)
Back with a fic for the McKay/Weir ficathon. THE DUE DATE IS WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 19TH for all people participating who see this. :) I'm just posting this now so I can use it as an example.
Title: Left Unspoken
Rating: Uh...PGish
Pairing: Simon/Weir, McKay/Weir friendship
Spoilers: They abound: "Letters From Pegasus", "The Siege", "Intruder", "Trinity"...
Author's Note: Written for mimuscardenalis for the McKay/Weir ficathon. The challenge was to include a reference to "Trinity", Weir's POV, to reflect on Simon/Weir, and not to have it be overly fluffy. Hope you enjoy this!
We’ve talked about everything; anything that came to mind. After the Wraith left, there had been little to talk about. Still, we’d talked through the night. But now, when there is so much to discuss, so many things that we should talk about, silence reigns.
It’s dark now; the day blended into the night hours ago. I suppose everyone else in Atlantis is asleep, as we should be. Truthfully, if we were in our quarters, I know that sleep would not come easy. It’s much more peaceful here on the balcony, where you can let the natural calming of the waves wash over you. Sometimes you forget yourself in the gentle rise and fall of the waters, and all your troubles are left behind. I wish I could lose myself to the sea now, but there is too much going on in my mind for me to pay much attention to anything out there.
Rodney is standing beside me, and I know his thoughts are troubled too. The last few days have taken their toll on him. Our friendship calls for me to comfort him in his time of need, but it’s selfishness that wins now, and I leave him to solve his own problems as I deal with mine.
It’s been awhile since I’ve been out here; been awhile since I could think about things. The last time I was here…I think it was just before I left for Earth. What a fun trip that was. I don’t know what I expected, but I know it wasn’t what I received. But oddly enough…it was what I asked for.
I knew it was unfair; to leave Simon on Earth like I did. I questioned my decision so many times, but no matter what I thought about it, it couldn’t change things. When the government let me tape that message to him before we left…I didn’t have the strength to let him go. Just before the Wraith struck, I sent a new message to him, telling him to move on. It was the right thing to do.
I told him to move on…so why was I so surprised when, a few weeks later, I came home to find that he had done just that? Somewhere in the back of my mind I had always thought he would be there. I was so relieved to come back to Atlantis; my oasis from Earth. I didn’t - I don’t - want to accept the fact that he’s moved on. How is it that I can agree with this, know it was the right thing to do, but at the same time be hurt by it?
Now I remember why I love my career so much. It’s clean and precise - and even when it’s complicated, things can be worked out and fixed. Sometimes I wonder if that’s why I work so hard - because it’s everything that I wish my life was.
I think that’s why Rodney works so hard, too. He likes the systematic order of science - there’s always an answer out there, and if there’s not one yet, it just hasn’t been found. We all learn about human emotions through family and friends, but Rodney never had that luxury. What he learned in his childhood was jaded, and now he is learning it all over again.
He screwed up big time with the weapon, I’ll openly admit that, but he’s paying for it now. I can’t comfort him because he manipulated my trust by getting my approval through John. I knew that Rodney was excited about the weapon - I knew it would cloud his judgment. I trusted John because he had an impartial view, at least until Rodney pleaded with him to tip the scales in his favor. Still, Rodney did it because he wanted the weapon to work, to be able to destroy the Wraith. He had good intentions at heart…and so did I.
Maybe our situations aren’t that different. Rodney knew that he wasn’t smarter than the Ancients, and I knew that Simon had probably moved on. Still, we both chose to tempt the fates, and we both got hurt because of it.
And we’re both still healing.
--
Oh! Before I forget, I updated "Forsaken Future" over at fanfiction.net/~LittleKnux2008; up to chapter 4 already. O.o I wonder how long this is going to be.
Off to finish the second assignment for the ficathon (*whistles innocently*), look over a friend's oceanography essay, bio homework, and then working on the masterlist thing for the ficathon. Where does the free time go?
Title: Left Unspoken
Rating: Uh...PGish
Pairing: Simon/Weir, McKay/Weir friendship
Spoilers: They abound: "Letters From Pegasus", "The Siege", "Intruder", "Trinity"...
Author's Note: Written for mimuscardenalis for the McKay/Weir ficathon. The challenge was to include a reference to "Trinity", Weir's POV, to reflect on Simon/Weir, and not to have it be overly fluffy. Hope you enjoy this!
We’ve talked about everything; anything that came to mind. After the Wraith left, there had been little to talk about. Still, we’d talked through the night. But now, when there is so much to discuss, so many things that we should talk about, silence reigns.
It’s dark now; the day blended into the night hours ago. I suppose everyone else in Atlantis is asleep, as we should be. Truthfully, if we were in our quarters, I know that sleep would not come easy. It’s much more peaceful here on the balcony, where you can let the natural calming of the waves wash over you. Sometimes you forget yourself in the gentle rise and fall of the waters, and all your troubles are left behind. I wish I could lose myself to the sea now, but there is too much going on in my mind for me to pay much attention to anything out there.
Rodney is standing beside me, and I know his thoughts are troubled too. The last few days have taken their toll on him. Our friendship calls for me to comfort him in his time of need, but it’s selfishness that wins now, and I leave him to solve his own problems as I deal with mine.
It’s been awhile since I’ve been out here; been awhile since I could think about things. The last time I was here…I think it was just before I left for Earth. What a fun trip that was. I don’t know what I expected, but I know it wasn’t what I received. But oddly enough…it was what I asked for.
I knew it was unfair; to leave Simon on Earth like I did. I questioned my decision so many times, but no matter what I thought about it, it couldn’t change things. When the government let me tape that message to him before we left…I didn’t have the strength to let him go. Just before the Wraith struck, I sent a new message to him, telling him to move on. It was the right thing to do.
I told him to move on…so why was I so surprised when, a few weeks later, I came home to find that he had done just that? Somewhere in the back of my mind I had always thought he would be there. I was so relieved to come back to Atlantis; my oasis from Earth. I didn’t - I don’t - want to accept the fact that he’s moved on. How is it that I can agree with this, know it was the right thing to do, but at the same time be hurt by it?
Now I remember why I love my career so much. It’s clean and precise - and even when it’s complicated, things can be worked out and fixed. Sometimes I wonder if that’s why I work so hard - because it’s everything that I wish my life was.
I think that’s why Rodney works so hard, too. He likes the systematic order of science - there’s always an answer out there, and if there’s not one yet, it just hasn’t been found. We all learn about human emotions through family and friends, but Rodney never had that luxury. What he learned in his childhood was jaded, and now he is learning it all over again.
He screwed up big time with the weapon, I’ll openly admit that, but he’s paying for it now. I can’t comfort him because he manipulated my trust by getting my approval through John. I knew that Rodney was excited about the weapon - I knew it would cloud his judgment. I trusted John because he had an impartial view, at least until Rodney pleaded with him to tip the scales in his favor. Still, Rodney did it because he wanted the weapon to work, to be able to destroy the Wraith. He had good intentions at heart…and so did I.
Maybe our situations aren’t that different. Rodney knew that he wasn’t smarter than the Ancients, and I knew that Simon had probably moved on. Still, we both chose to tempt the fates, and we both got hurt because of it.
And we’re both still healing.
--
Oh! Before I forget, I updated "Forsaken Future" over at fanfiction.net/~LittleKnux2008; up to chapter 4 already. O.o I wonder how long this is going to be.
Off to finish the second assignment for the ficathon (*whistles innocently*), look over a friend's oceanography essay, bio homework, and then working on the masterlist thing for the ficathon. Where does the free time go?