That "Mother of the Year" award is mine.
Yesterday, I lost one of the kids. Surprisingly, it was the first time.
Also surprisingly, it was the oldest kid.
Ash joined the anime/manga club at school. It meets once a week, after school, and since he doesn't drive yet, I pick him up at 4:30 in front of the school on those days.
I have told Ash that it is very important for him to be at our meeting spot at 4:30, because I usually have a carload of kids who are not interested in things like sitting in the car and waiting. Also, I keep to a pretty tight schedule. Dinner is ALWAYS at six, which means I need to be back home by five to get it started. He's been very good about that so far, always waiting for me when I pull up.
But not yesterday.
I arrived at 4:31, and didn't see Ash waiting for me. So I parked and waited. Fifteen minutes pass, and still no sign of Ash. I send Jaden into the school to find an adult and ask where the anime/manga club meets. (Oh, I forgot to mention that I just got finished working out, so I was wearing a shitty t-shirt, sweat pants and no bra. I take my bra off immediately after working out because it is sweaty and gross. That's why I asked Jaden to go in.)
Jaden is inside for ten more minutes, then returns and says that he couldn't find anyone.
Then I remembered a conversation Ash and I had the night before. He said he was probably going to start catching rides home with his friend Ethan. I told him that would be great, but to please call me and let me know. Well, I didn't get a phone call, but since it was now almost five, I figured he rode home with Ethan but just forgot to call. I did one more circle through the parking lot and headed home.
And of course when I get home, he's not here. This is when I started freaking out.
I called Cam and asked him if HE has heard from Ash. Nope. Trying not to panic, I keep telling myself that Ash will either show up with Ethan or call any minute. OH, I also forgot to mention that we were meeting my family for my little brother's birthday dinner last night, so while running around and trying to get the smaller kids ready, I keep looking out the door for Ash. Finally at 5:45, I called Cam again and asked him to go by the school and see if he can find Ash.
At this time, Cam's phone stops working. Of course.
While I am furiously trying to reach Cam on the phone, a number pops up on my phone's screen that I don't know. The phone didn't ring, the number just appeared and then went away. I called it back, and a kid answers. I ask with whom I am speaking, and the kid says, "yeah, I think your son just tried to call you from my phone. He's over there walking around the parking lot now." I thank the kid, and tell him to go tell Ash to stay there, his dad is on the way.
Of course I still can't get Cam on the phone to tell him where Ash is, and I don't know if Cam is at the school or what. So I start texting him and tell him that Ash is in the parking lot. Finally he gets my messages, finds Ash, and the day is saved.
So here's the scoop, according to Ash: his club meeting ran long because they were watching a movie. I told him that I waited in the parking lot til almost five, so that must have been a damn long movie. He stammers something about it only being a few minutes, and he went right outside and I wasn't there. (WHATEVER.) Anyway, what does he do when he goes out there and I'm not there? NOTHING. He says that he eventually tried to use the office phone to call me, but couldn't figure out how to get an outside line. So, instead of asking one of the HUNDREDS of people still at the school to help him or let him use their phone, he just sits there. In the rain. For over an hour. An hour in which I am flipping out at home, thinking that he's been kidnapped or been in a car wreck with his friend or run away or a zillion other terrible things. It was almost six before he asked someone to use their phone, and then when he didn't get through, he just hung up and walked away. Thank god I called that number back.
I am very concerned about his ability to function in real life if he would rather sit in the dark and the rain for two hours instead of making a real effort to get in touch with us.
And yes, I do have guilt about it. Maybe if I had waited five more minutes, etc. But then again, the kid should have been where he was supposed to be when he was supposed to be there, right? Right.
Ugh. Even though it was all his fault, nothing makes you feel like a shitty parent like losing a kid for a few hours.
Also surprisingly, it was the oldest kid.
Ash joined the anime/manga club at school. It meets once a week, after school, and since he doesn't drive yet, I pick him up at 4:30 in front of the school on those days.
I have told Ash that it is very important for him to be at our meeting spot at 4:30, because I usually have a carload of kids who are not interested in things like sitting in the car and waiting. Also, I keep to a pretty tight schedule. Dinner is ALWAYS at six, which means I need to be back home by five to get it started. He's been very good about that so far, always waiting for me when I pull up.
But not yesterday.
I arrived at 4:31, and didn't see Ash waiting for me. So I parked and waited. Fifteen minutes pass, and still no sign of Ash. I send Jaden into the school to find an adult and ask where the anime/manga club meets. (Oh, I forgot to mention that I just got finished working out, so I was wearing a shitty t-shirt, sweat pants and no bra. I take my bra off immediately after working out because it is sweaty and gross. That's why I asked Jaden to go in.)
Jaden is inside for ten more minutes, then returns and says that he couldn't find anyone.
Then I remembered a conversation Ash and I had the night before. He said he was probably going to start catching rides home with his friend Ethan. I told him that would be great, but to please call me and let me know. Well, I didn't get a phone call, but since it was now almost five, I figured he rode home with Ethan but just forgot to call. I did one more circle through the parking lot and headed home.
And of course when I get home, he's not here. This is when I started freaking out.
I called Cam and asked him if HE has heard from Ash. Nope. Trying not to panic, I keep telling myself that Ash will either show up with Ethan or call any minute. OH, I also forgot to mention that we were meeting my family for my little brother's birthday dinner last night, so while running around and trying to get the smaller kids ready, I keep looking out the door for Ash. Finally at 5:45, I called Cam again and asked him to go by the school and see if he can find Ash.
At this time, Cam's phone stops working. Of course.
While I am furiously trying to reach Cam on the phone, a number pops up on my phone's screen that I don't know. The phone didn't ring, the number just appeared and then went away. I called it back, and a kid answers. I ask with whom I am speaking, and the kid says, "yeah, I think your son just tried to call you from my phone. He's over there walking around the parking lot now." I thank the kid, and tell him to go tell Ash to stay there, his dad is on the way.
Of course I still can't get Cam on the phone to tell him where Ash is, and I don't know if Cam is at the school or what. So I start texting him and tell him that Ash is in the parking lot. Finally he gets my messages, finds Ash, and the day is saved.
So here's the scoop, according to Ash: his club meeting ran long because they were watching a movie. I told him that I waited in the parking lot til almost five, so that must have been a damn long movie. He stammers something about it only being a few minutes, and he went right outside and I wasn't there. (WHATEVER.) Anyway, what does he do when he goes out there and I'm not there? NOTHING. He says that he eventually tried to use the office phone to call me, but couldn't figure out how to get an outside line. So, instead of asking one of the HUNDREDS of people still at the school to help him or let him use their phone, he just sits there. In the rain. For over an hour. An hour in which I am flipping out at home, thinking that he's been kidnapped or been in a car wreck with his friend or run away or a zillion other terrible things. It was almost six before he asked someone to use their phone, and then when he didn't get through, he just hung up and walked away. Thank god I called that number back.
I am very concerned about his ability to function in real life if he would rather sit in the dark and the rain for two hours instead of making a real effort to get in touch with us.
And yes, I do have guilt about it. Maybe if I had waited five more minutes, etc. But then again, the kid should have been where he was supposed to be when he was supposed to be there, right? Right.
Ugh. Even though it was all his fault, nothing makes you feel like a shitty parent like losing a kid for a few hours.