why can't this crazy love be mine
I wanted to update real bad yesterday
But stupid livejournal was down due to a power outage.
I was in this real bad mood yesterday.
Just everything bad jumbled together into this one huge problem and it got me thinking about things.
But for the record...
I'm Done with Everything.
I'm really not exactly sure where all these emotions are coming from.
But they are here, and i need to get them sorted out somehow.
Maybe it's the stress from exams.
Maybe it's being sick.
Maybe it's the boy that i like telling me that he likes me too but he "doesn't know"
Or maybe it's the one person that i thought was my best friend, is treating me like shit and is total opposite of what i knew of her.
Or it's just that i don't know
I hate waking up every morning to this life.
I hate waking up and wondering why i am still here.
I just hate how the only person that kept me going is now dead.
I want to cry. But crying never solves anything. Crying never makes the bad things go away and get better. Maybe for those hours you spend crying it does, But when you're done, you still have to deal with your messed up life.
I hate how i've turned into a friend and even a person that i've always hated.
I thought that i knew exactly who i was. I thought that i liked the person that i was. But, i'm still finding out who i am, and i never will be satisfied.
And i hate how with the guys that i like, you have to be a certain type of girl.
You have to be freakishly skinny, play a sport, and be popular.
But here i am. Average girl. Is in marching band. and has my own group of friends that isn't popular and doesn't care for it. and a pretty awesome girl, i should add.
Some drastic thoughts came to mind. I shook them off though.
So there is this issue still left with my "best friend" that i want to get sorted out before this weekend is over. And hopefully it does.
But i think that i've vented enough.
Time for happy updating...
Sooo since i didn't get the chance to update at all yesterday.. here's my chance.
Thursday and friday helped with the band table for the 8th graders.
Let's just say that little 8th graders are little bitches.
One 8th grade girl had plastic surgery on her ears and nose.
RE-EFFING-DICULOUS!!!!
Just because you won the lottery 2 times doesn't mean you need to go and do that stuff!
Psssh!
Ellen Huntley is one little sweetheart though!
Exams were also thursday and friday.
Went pretty well.
Found it ridiculous that a couple of my friends cheated on the earth science exam.
I'd rather fail the test than take the risk of getting caught.
But whatever.
There was this one little 8th grade boy on friday that i wanted to slap.
I tagged along with jessica and briana's group of touring.
And this one little short red haired kid, started acting completely dumb. Thinking it was soo hilarious.
I seriously wanted to bitch him out, and tell him how that attitude will get you somewhere bad in high school.
Then the rest of jessica's group besides two left with ron's and keith's group to go look at the gym.
I yelled "HEY! kid's in jessica's group, get your butt's back up there RIGHT NOW"
and they looked at me like i was a mean mean person.
Stupid 8th grade bitches.
Went and listened to the Q&A session. Had fun with erik,alex,heather, and eldor.
Mrs.Hall was obsessed with my hair! haha
Hung out in the band room till jessica's madre got there.
Then went home.
Ooh yeah! When the 8th graders were in the student center looking at the clubs, we had winterguard go down there and do parts of their show. It was sweeeeeeeet. everyone looked!
Today was a pretty fun day.
I told aaron i needed to talk to his mom.
So his mom picked me up at around 130.
we stopped by to get some tissues for me cause my nose was out of control!!!!
Then went to olive garden. Really long wait.
Left there and decided to go to bennigans.
15-20 minute wait.
Ate our dinner and i talked to her about stuff.
It felt good to get some stuff out.
We thought of some solutions to the issues, and i really hope that they work.
Went to the mall after.
She bought me this pair of cute boy briefs from victoria secrets
Then some earrings from pac sun.
Went to go pick up aaron so he could get some clothes.
Took soooooooooooooo long to find clothes and decide for him.
Finally got done and wondered around the mall.
Ashley tried to be cool and sneak up on me!
hah caught her.
Got ice cream.
and wandered some more.
then left.
Now i'm home.
Nothing to do
Met my sister's boyfriend too.
Resolved things with aaron. It feels good.
And i don't like anybody. Yess!!
Boys are a hassle.
Ooh, i must add that the movie "now you see it..." on the disney channel is quite good.
Hmmm, what else to say?
New color of journal.
Likey likey?!?!
Hope so.
I'm off!
this was waaay longer than i expected.
I'll leave you with alex's awesomeness and a quiz thingy mabob.
PissYellow25 6 4: well sky if it makes u feel better
PissYellow25 6 4: u have a great rack
PissYellow25 6 4: its like a 10 point
PissYellow25 6 4: and u could deposit those cans for like $100000000000
Hah! I loooove alex! and i must add, he said this when i had a sad away message up!
You scored as Indie. Indie.
Indie
83%
Classic Rock.
83%
Punk and Pop Punk.
67%
Ska
58%
Indie Rock
58%
Emo & More
46%
Hardcore
38%
Industrial
38%
Mainstream
29%
Britpop
25%
Hip Hop and Rap
21%
Country
13%
Music Recommendation
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DAMN STRAIGHT I'M INDIE!!!