[comment log \o/]nk1124February 12 2007, 02:47:22 UTC
{Nuku Nuku stood at the fountain of the northern sector of Vertere, taking in the sight of everything. It almost looked like the southern sector, but still very different. Isaak helped her get there, but could he help get her back? She hoped so.
She stepped away from the fountain and began walking toward the building Reeve had told her he was staying in. She remembered that it was an apartment building, a white one, and when she came to it, she looked up}
Where are you in here? I don't know how far up. I should have asked.
[Walking back from his impromptu visit to the fountain, Reeve had been intent on just taking another potion and crawling in the bed- it was the longest trip he'd made since coming 'home', and it'd been a bit of a strain. He'd just barely managed to get the door closed when that oh-so-familiar voice reached his ears. Popping his head out the door- third floor wasn't that high up, but it was high enough- he looked down and broke out into the first honest grin he'd had in ages.]
... heheh. There's my girl. I'll be right down... or did you want to come in?
{Before the transformation, the android would have run up the stairs to him. Not anymore, as the increase of her feral instincts made her take the most direct way.
Then she was there, right in front of the door to Reeve's apartment, in her yellow coat and dirty clothing. Her shoes were a bit torn up, and her skirt was tattered and torn just above the middle of her thighs. The short shirt beneath the coat was in just as bad shape, with one strap missing. But she didn't care.}
.....! O- of course. You're always welcome here, Atsuko. You should know that.
[He couldn't help but frown a bit at seeing her in such disarray- not that he really looked much better. His face was still gaunt; the sweatshirt he'd borrowed from Cid was two sizes too big, hanging off his thin frame and exposing the edge of a thich burn scar along his collarbone. For a moment he reached up to touch her cheek, then reached out and hugged the girl he considered his daughter tightly.]
I was worried about you. Have you been hurt? Did you get into a fight on the way here? Are you feeling all right?
I feel fine. Master is good; he gives me meals at regular scheduled times and gives me free time to do what I please.
{Nuku Nuku stiffened, suddenly alert as if she expected someone to attack them. It was only a hug and she had nothing to fear. Her arms moved around him and her fingertips just barely touched Reeve's back. She hesitated to hug him back.}
There were people who refused to come to Master. I made them stop moving.
[It was difficult to keep the disapproving tone out of his voice when she mentioned her 'master'. She wasn't a slave, she was his daughter. Her stiffened pose and reluctance to return the gesture made him pull away, giving her a small, lopsided smile as he opened the door for her.]
.... stop... moving? I... I think I.... Come in and sit down. Talk to me. What exactly do you mean, 'made them stop moving'? How did you do that?
{One of her hands shot up to his throat where she placed in the exact same spot she had been taught.}
I have to slowly close my hand until the person's face starts turning colors and their eyes roll into the back of their head. I have to make sure that they are sleeping. Then I take them to Master.
{Nuku Nuku's hand dropped and she walked inside as he had requested.}
Master says that once more tests are completed, I will be allowed to take down buildings. He says I am a little physically unfit to put myself in that kind of danger.
[He went utterly rigidwhen she put her hand around his throat, eyes going wide in horror as she so calmly explained how she was strangling people, knocking them out and dragging them unwillingly to whatever fate the Avatar had planned. he didn't move for several long moments as she went in, then followed her, closing the door softly and sitting on his overstuffed couch.]
... Atsuko, you do realize that... you're hurting people, don't you? That doing that... damages them, causes them pain? That you're forcing people to do things against their will? What you're doing... it's wrong!
... you knew that before. You'd never have done anything like that before... what happened to change your mind...?
{Her coat slipped down to hang at her elbows as she looked around the apartment. Though Nuku Nuku tried to look uninterested, she wanted to know what kind of place this was.}
And Master has let me see you. Even so, seeing you like this is unsatisfying. These feelings are not the feelings Master says are perfect. Perfection makes you happy.
{She turned to look back at Reeve with eyes full of confusion.}
If Master says that I am on my way to perfection, then why do I feel so unhappy when I see you? I don't understand! I have to understand! Tell me why!
[The studio apartment was a relatively faithful replica of his home on Gaia- wide open spaces, large windows overlooking a patio, comfortable furniture sharing space with artist easels and a drafting board, the kitchen nook covered in half dirty dishes (courtesy of Cid) and robotic parts. he barely gave it a thought- Shinra mansion had become home to him now, and this large space felt empty to him without everyone there.]
.... What kind of feelings does he say are perfect? What kind of happiness? There are many kinds of happiness, Atsuko, just as there are many kinds of sadness.
[He lowered his head for a moment at the question, shutting his eyes and trying to clear the pain from his face- that question had hurt, hurt badly. After a moment he looked back up and motioned for her to sit beside him.]You... Atsuko, what you've been doing is wrong. Perfection isn't a scientific process, it's nothing that can be bottled and forced. The journey towards being perfect is more important than the arrival. Those people... may not have been
( ... )
{Nuku Nuku stared at him, wondering if coming to visit was a good idea or not. What if he had something planned for her as soon as she sat down? She watched him closely as she sat next to him.}
Never! I remember that whenever I saw you, I was happy and wanted to run to you! But now, after I asked Master to help me, whenever I see you I feel horrible. I feel like I'm the worst person in the world when I see you! Like I really am doing something wrong!
{Her hands gripped her knees with such a strong force that one might think she would break her knees. Her body was strong and stood up to her frustration.}
I want everyone to be happy, and Master says that by helping me and Raziel, he is making things better for us. He says it pleases the Lord and that I must endure the hardest tests to reach that point. But then I think of you an I can barely get by! I don't understand why! Why, Reeve-papa, why?!
[it was an almost instinctive move; reaching out, he pulled her into a hug, wrapping his arms around her and tucking her head under his chin. part of him was seething in fury at the Avatar that had brought his daughter to that state. Most of him, however, was more concerned with trying to repair the damage that'd been done.]
One of the most important things you can do is trust your feelings. If you're being told that what you do will reach perfection... and it hurts you to follow through... then believe in your feelings. Logic... can't explain everything.
You're gentle. As long as I've known you, you've never liked to hurt others. You're my daughter and I'll love you no matter what. It's... just listen, and please, please don't be hurt by what I'm about to say.
[He began to stroke her hair, trying to form into words how to explain it without hurting any more than she already was.]You remember... when I was... taken away at the Gala. by an Avatar. He hurt me and he took me to his place because he wanted to
( ... )
I remember that. And I ran all around looking for you but couldn't find you. Cait said that you probably had too much to drink and that you were probably still able to see me sing.
{In Reeve's arms the cat girl felt safe, albeit a little fearful. She held on tightly to him, purring from the stroking, and pressed just a little closer to him.}
Master...he wouldn't do something like that! I know him and he only does good! That's what he says. He says he does good for everyone! Even though that's what he says, and I believe what he says...listening to you makes me doubt him.
Reeve has so much power over me. Why do I take you so seriously...when you do not agree with Master...I like Master because he helped me get to Reeve, but I like Reeve-papa so much more. I love Reeve-papa.
Actually... I didn't have anything to drink at all. I guess I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. I'm sorry I missed you singing. I'd been looking forward to it.
[Smiling just a bit at the purring, he gently continued stroking her hair, nuzzling his cheek against the top of her head and pulling her closer. Even if it was that small point of contact... he would protect her that much.]When you love someone... it means you take them into your heart and never let go. It means that you would put their happiness above your own. I'm grateful to the Avatar for allowing you to come and see me. But... in the end, you have to decide for yourself what's right and wrong. I can't make that decision for you
( ... )
A lot of the things he did hurt, but because he was letting me see you, it didn't bother me. And now the tests are getting harder and they hurt more than they did before. If pain means bad things then I don't want to feel pain. I wanted happiness...
{Nuku Nuku put her hand on Reeve's arm and gave it a slight nudge as she pulled her head back to look up at him. She demanded the ability to understand just by her gaze.}
I'm confused! I want to protect but all I know now is how to destroy! That's all protecting is, though, isn't it? Destroying bad things? I thought that's what I'm doing. I'm doing bad things that hurt others and makes Reeve-papa hurt?
...Am I so bad that I've turned into someone like the man who hurt you?
.... I know you wanted to see me, but... I never wanted you to be in pain, Atsuko. That's what hurts me- to know you're hurting.
[Letting her pull away, he cupped her cheek in one hand and looked directly at her, no matter how much he wanted to look away. Oh, he'd hurt her now... and he didn't know how to fix this.]
No, Atsuko. You're not bad. You're not bad at all, never think that! If you can feel pain for others... if you can feel remorse... then you'll never be bad. You miht do some things that aren't right... but everyone does that. I've done many, many things that weren't right, and I've hurt many people... but I've always tried to make up for my mistakes.
Protecting someone... you know how to protect. You knew it before the Avatar touched you. it's still there inside you. To protect is to make sure no one gets hurt- or if it can't be avoided, to make sure that neither side is hurt any more than they need to be, to be stopped.
She stepped away from the fountain and began walking toward the building Reeve had told her he was staying in. She remembered that it was an apartment building, a white one, and when she came to it, she looked up}
Where are you in here? I don't know how far up. I should have asked.
Reply
... heheh. There's my girl. I'll be right down... or did you want to come in?
Reply
{Before the transformation, the android would have run up the stairs to him. Not anymore, as the increase of her feral instincts made her take the most direct way.
Then she was there, right in front of the door to Reeve's apartment, in her yellow coat and dirty clothing. Her shoes were a bit torn up, and her skirt was tattered and torn just above the middle of her thighs. The short shirt beneath the coat was in just as bad shape, with one strap missing. But she didn't care.}
If you will let me come in.
Reply
[He couldn't help but frown a bit at seeing her in such disarray- not that he really looked much better. His face was still gaunt; the sweatshirt he'd borrowed from Cid was two sizes too big, hanging off his thin frame and exposing the edge of a thich burn scar along his collarbone. For a moment he reached up to touch her cheek, then reached out and hugged the girl he considered his daughter tightly.]
I was worried about you. Have you been hurt? Did you get into a fight on the way here? Are you feeling all right?
Reply
{Nuku Nuku stiffened, suddenly alert as if she expected someone to attack them. It was only a hug and she had nothing to fear. Her arms moved around him and her fingertips just barely touched Reeve's back. She hesitated to hug him back.}
There were people who refused to come to Master. I made them stop moving.
Reply
[It was difficult to keep the disapproving tone out of his voice when she mentioned her 'master'. She wasn't a slave, she was his daughter. Her stiffened pose and reluctance to return the gesture made him pull away, giving her a small, lopsided smile as he opened the door for her.]
.... stop... moving? I... I think I.... Come in and sit down. Talk to me. What exactly do you mean, 'made them stop moving'? How did you do that?
Reply
{One of her hands shot up to his throat where she placed in the exact same spot she had been taught.}
I have to slowly close my hand until the person's face starts turning colors and their eyes roll into the back of their head. I have to make sure that they are sleeping. Then I take them to Master.
{Nuku Nuku's hand dropped and she walked inside as he had requested.}
Master says that once more tests are completed, I will be allowed to take down buildings. He says I am a little physically unfit to put myself in that kind of danger.
Reply
... Atsuko, you do realize that... you're hurting people, don't you? That doing that... damages them, causes them pain? That you're forcing people to do things against their will? What you're doing... it's wrong!
... you knew that before. You'd never have done anything like that before... what happened to change your mind...?
Reply
{Her coat slipped down to hang at her elbows as she looked around the apartment. Though Nuku Nuku tried to look uninterested, she wanted to know what kind of place this was.}
And Master has let me see you. Even so, seeing you like this is unsatisfying. These feelings are not the feelings Master says are perfect. Perfection makes you happy.
{She turned to look back at Reeve with eyes full of confusion.}
If Master says that I am on my way to perfection, then why do I feel so unhappy when I see you? I don't understand! I have to understand! Tell me why!
Reply
.... What kind of feelings does he say are perfect? What kind of happiness? There are many kinds of happiness, Atsuko, just as there are many kinds of sadness.
[He lowered his head for a moment at the question, shutting his eyes and trying to clear the pain from his face- that question had hurt, hurt badly. After a moment he looked back up and motioned for her to sit beside him.]You... Atsuko, what you've been doing is wrong. Perfection isn't a scientific process, it's nothing that can be bottled and forced. The journey towards being perfect is more important than the arrival. Those people... may not have been ( ... )
Reply
Never! I remember that whenever I saw you, I was happy and wanted to run to you! But now, after I asked Master to help me, whenever I see you I feel horrible. I feel like I'm the worst person in the world when I see you! Like I really am doing something wrong!
{Her hands gripped her knees with such a strong force that one might think she would break her knees. Her body was strong and stood up to her frustration.}
I want everyone to be happy, and Master says that by helping me and Raziel, he is making things better for us. He says it pleases the Lord and that I must endure the hardest tests to reach that point. But then I think of you an I can barely get by! I don't understand why! Why, Reeve-papa, why?!
...Reeve-papa...
Reply
[it was an almost instinctive move; reaching out, he pulled her into a hug, wrapping his arms around her and tucking her head under his chin. part of him was seething in fury at the Avatar that had brought his daughter to that state. Most of him, however, was more concerned with trying to repair the damage that'd been done.]
One of the most important things you can do is trust your feelings. If you're being told that what you do will reach perfection... and it hurts you to follow through... then believe in your feelings. Logic... can't explain everything.
You're gentle. As long as I've known you, you've never liked to hurt others. You're my daughter and I'll love you no matter what. It's... just listen, and please, please don't be hurt by what I'm about to say.
[He began to stroke her hair, trying to form into words how to explain it without hurting any more than she already was.]You remember... when I was... taken away at the Gala. by an Avatar. He hurt me and he took me to his place because he wanted to ( ... )
Reply
{In Reeve's arms the cat girl felt safe, albeit a little fearful. She held on tightly to him, purring from the stroking, and pressed just a little closer to him.}
Master...he wouldn't do something like that! I know him and he only does good! That's what he says. He says he does good for everyone! Even though that's what he says, and I believe what he says...listening to you makes me doubt him.
Reeve has so much power over me. Why do I take you so seriously...when you do not agree with Master...I like Master because he helped me get to Reeve, but I like Reeve-papa so much more. I love Reeve-papa.
Reply
[Smiling just a bit at the purring, he gently continued stroking her hair, nuzzling his cheek against the top of her head and pulling her closer. Even if it was that small point of contact... he would protect her that much.]When you love someone... it means you take them into your heart and never let go. It means that you would put their happiness above your own. I'm grateful to the Avatar for allowing you to come and see me. But... in the end, you have to decide for yourself what's right and wrong. I can't make that decision for you ( ... )
Reply
{Nuku Nuku put her hand on Reeve's arm and gave it a slight nudge as she pulled her head back to look up at him. She demanded the ability to understand just by her gaze.}
I'm confused! I want to protect but all I know now is how to destroy! That's all protecting is, though, isn't it? Destroying bad things? I thought that's what I'm doing. I'm doing bad things that hurt others and makes Reeve-papa hurt?
...Am I so bad that I've turned into someone like the man who hurt you?
Reply
[Letting her pull away, he cupped her cheek in one hand and looked directly at her, no matter how much he wanted to look away. Oh, he'd hurt her now... and he didn't know how to fix this.]
No, Atsuko. You're not bad. You're not bad at all, never think that! If you can feel pain for others... if you can feel remorse... then you'll never be bad. You miht do some things that aren't right... but everyone does that. I've done many, many things that weren't right, and I've hurt many people... but I've always tried to make up for my mistakes.
Protecting someone... you know how to protect. You knew it before the Avatar touched you. it's still there inside you. To protect is to make sure no one gets hurt- or if it can't be avoided, to make sure that neither side is hurt any more than they need to be, to be stopped.
Reply
Leave a comment