bridges
i realized that i dont want to burn my bridges. not because im afraid of needing people- but because if there was a bridge in the first place- even if i dont want to walk it all the time- there was a reason it was put down. i dont know if that makes sense to anyone else- but it does to me.
so i have started trying to make a mends with those who i realize i may have already set aflame.
i found my childhood best friend ever- the one who knew what you were thinking before you thought it- and then would explain it to you over a sleep over, hair, makeup, and the dance she was trying to teach you. im glad we were apart- i dont think i could have remained her friend if we hadnt- but im thrilled that she's back and that we still get the other's thoughts, and explain them over slumber parties- even if we leave out the unnecessary make up and gold cone hair pieces that were oh so cool in the early 90's.
i found someone that matters a lot to me and realized that things dont have to enter oblivion for them to be ok- for me to be ok with them rather. it'll take time- but that's ok, i dont want to lose that bridge.
and then, there was another who i know i set aflame, i asked to disappear. only i realize that people dont disappear- no matter the circumstances- you cant ask that of someone. i was upset- with reason, but that's not an answer- so tonight- i hope to find that the bridge is more then just ash. i hope it is. because it's one that made me laugh- a lot.
in all of these cases though- i am not looking at the bridge as something to carry me over that which i dont or cant be in. i am a much stronger person now then i was. they are bridges that make things easier, and in general- make me happier. no bridges aren't necessities (at least in these cases) but they make the trip more enjoyable.
for those of you who know who you are- thank you.
so i have started trying to make a mends with those who i realize i may have already set aflame.
i found my childhood best friend ever- the one who knew what you were thinking before you thought it- and then would explain it to you over a sleep over, hair, makeup, and the dance she was trying to teach you. im glad we were apart- i dont think i could have remained her friend if we hadnt- but im thrilled that she's back and that we still get the other's thoughts, and explain them over slumber parties- even if we leave out the unnecessary make up and gold cone hair pieces that were oh so cool in the early 90's.
i found someone that matters a lot to me and realized that things dont have to enter oblivion for them to be ok- for me to be ok with them rather. it'll take time- but that's ok, i dont want to lose that bridge.
and then, there was another who i know i set aflame, i asked to disappear. only i realize that people dont disappear- no matter the circumstances- you cant ask that of someone. i was upset- with reason, but that's not an answer- so tonight- i hope to find that the bridge is more then just ash. i hope it is. because it's one that made me laugh- a lot.
in all of these cases though- i am not looking at the bridge as something to carry me over that which i dont or cant be in. i am a much stronger person now then i was. they are bridges that make things easier, and in general- make me happier. no bridges aren't necessities (at least in these cases) but they make the trip more enjoyable.
for those of you who know who you are- thank you.