it's always hannah's fault.
I had an email exchange with ohmyghost that went like this:
A: hahaha did you see this arama post?
H: haha yeah I heard about this, best. I love the part where his friends are all dicks and sent him pictures of the truck. "th-thanks guys. thanks a lot."
A: ahahahahaha i know right. if i was matsujun's friend i would totally do that.
H: if i was matsujun's friend I'd weep for joy every day at his pubic humiliation. i'd offer to drive the damn thing. (I am a good friend.)
A: lololol steal the van and drive it round to his place and park it in front of his gate. then stock up on snacks and wait for him to return, just to see his face. lololol we are GREAT friends.
H: yes
yes
YES
DO IT
/WRITE IT
OC FIC
A: who needs original characters? nino would totally do it.
H: I AM EXPECTING A DRABBLE ON YOUR LJ IN 5
It had been an exceedingly long day. Not a bad day - Jun refused to have a bad day on his birthday, even if nobody had even remembered to wish him a happy birthday - just a long one. The sort after which he was used to going home, collapsing in front of the television and drifting comfortably in and out of sleep until the infomercials started. Unfortunately, that wasn't going to happen, and Jun became instantly aware of it the second his taxi turned the corner onto his street.
"I'll get out here, thanks," Jun said, stopping the driver from getting any closer to the monstrosity that was taking up half of the street. He waited for the taxi to leave the street entirely before he moved cautiously towards the... thing in front of his house.
It was the Himitsu no Arashi-chan promotional van, complete with embarrassingly large photos of him in an embarrassing outfit, parked right in front of his front gate. He'd thought they'd been discontinued ages ago. Sure, they'd trolled the streets for ages, and he'd gotten many an enthusiastic email from his friends with photos of - and occasionally with - the vans, but he'd thought it was all over. He'd thought he could get on with his life and stop being reminded of this.
In fact, he thought to himself, getting progressively more irate as he approached the vehicle, his strides becoming less cautious and more purposeful, he had half a mind to call his manager and ask what the hell was going on. He reached for his mobile phone, determined to start demanding that the vans be recalled and at least painted over if not disassembled entirely -- when he got a look at the person behind the wheel.
Nino smirked at him from behind the windshield, saluting him quickly before he opened the door and jumped down from the tall car. "Like your birthday present?" he asked, closing the door behind him and leaning against the wheel.
Jun just blinked. "Are you even licensed -"
"I'll take that as a yes!" Nino replied, still grinning. He angled his head to the side so he could take a good look at the van. "You know, I really love this van. What I like most is how big it is. I mean, Sho's nostrils are bigger than my hand, so your entire outfit must be... well, it's impressive. And so much more astounding up close."
Now that the confusion had cleared and Jun knew how the van had come to be sitting in front of his house, he was just annoyed. He couldn't even get to the gate with Nino's (admittedly expertly executed) parking job. "Why did you park the van in front of my house, Nino?" He could hear the plaintive tone to his voice, but honestly. It was his birthday, and now he not only had to deal with Nino, but a truck-driving Nino at that.
"Why, don't you think it's stunning?"
Jun considered the enlarged display of one of his most humiliating failures of all time (it was in the top ten), and shrugged. He couldn't really argue with that - it was stunning. He looked back at Nino. "I just want to get some sleep. It's my birthday and I've been working all day. Can I get past the van, please?"
Pouting wasn't in Nino's repertoire, but Jun could see the desire to cross his features. Instead, he just sort of grimaced a bit before sighing loudly. "If you really want to. But then you'd miss out on the real present."
A part of Jun just wanted to ignore Nino and find a way to climb over the fence. But the part that remembered he had been practicing choreography for his solo in the concert all afternoon and couldn't lift his arm higher than his shoulder anymore won out, and his shoulders slumped. Nino was grinning before he even said, "okay, where's the real present?"
Nino walked quickly around to the back of the van, skipping his fingers excitedly over the outside as he went. Jun followed behind lazily, hitching his bag higher onto his shoulder, trying not to admit to himself that he was a little curious as to what Nino was doing. Nino looked a little awkward as he grabbed onto handles and hauled himself up onto a step-ladder, teetering on the edge of it as he unlocked bolts that were easily larger than his head, and Jun wondered if he was going to open the roller door without falling back onto the pavement.
After a few more seconds of fiddling around, Nino looked at Jun over his shoulder. "Happy birthday, Matsujun," he said with a smile - a genuine one this time - as he swung the roller door up to reveal --
"SURPRISE!!" Voices rattled around the spacious interior of the van, which was decked out with lights, balloons, streamers and, of course, a large poster of him in his losing Mannequin Five outfit. There was a table and chairs set up at the back corner, and someone hit "Play" on the sound system that was wrapped in protective gear. The assortment of people there was bizarre - staff and friends and a couple of sempai who clearly had nothing better to do on their night off - but the best part of all was the other members of Arashi, who were all wearing their most disastrous Mannequin Five outfits. Even Nino, whose pants looked much less normal under the disco ball lights, was wearing something horrific under the dark cardigan he had been wearing before (Jun suspected he had cheated and raided the VS Arashi closet).
"You guys..." Jun began, but stopped himself. He was still tired and wanted to sleep, but looking up at everyone's faces, he knew he couldn't turn down just a couple of drinks. "Help me up there already, will you?"
fin.
A: hahaha did you see this arama post?
H: haha yeah I heard about this, best. I love the part where his friends are all dicks and sent him pictures of the truck. "th-thanks guys. thanks a lot."
A: ahahahahaha i know right. if i was matsujun's friend i would totally do that.
H: if i was matsujun's friend I'd weep for joy every day at his pubic humiliation. i'd offer to drive the damn thing. (I am a good friend.)
A: lololol steal the van and drive it round to his place and park it in front of his gate. then stock up on snacks and wait for him to return, just to see his face. lololol we are GREAT friends.
H: yes
yes
YES
DO IT
/WRITE IT
OC FIC
A: who needs original characters? nino would totally do it.
H: I AM EXPECTING A DRABBLE ON YOUR LJ IN 5
It had been an exceedingly long day. Not a bad day - Jun refused to have a bad day on his birthday, even if nobody had even remembered to wish him a happy birthday - just a long one. The sort after which he was used to going home, collapsing in front of the television and drifting comfortably in and out of sleep until the infomercials started. Unfortunately, that wasn't going to happen, and Jun became instantly aware of it the second his taxi turned the corner onto his street.
"I'll get out here, thanks," Jun said, stopping the driver from getting any closer to the monstrosity that was taking up half of the street. He waited for the taxi to leave the street entirely before he moved cautiously towards the... thing in front of his house.
It was the Himitsu no Arashi-chan promotional van, complete with embarrassingly large photos of him in an embarrassing outfit, parked right in front of his front gate. He'd thought they'd been discontinued ages ago. Sure, they'd trolled the streets for ages, and he'd gotten many an enthusiastic email from his friends with photos of - and occasionally with - the vans, but he'd thought it was all over. He'd thought he could get on with his life and stop being reminded of this.
In fact, he thought to himself, getting progressively more irate as he approached the vehicle, his strides becoming less cautious and more purposeful, he had half a mind to call his manager and ask what the hell was going on. He reached for his mobile phone, determined to start demanding that the vans be recalled and at least painted over if not disassembled entirely -- when he got a look at the person behind the wheel.
Nino smirked at him from behind the windshield, saluting him quickly before he opened the door and jumped down from the tall car. "Like your birthday present?" he asked, closing the door behind him and leaning against the wheel.
Jun just blinked. "Are you even licensed -"
"I'll take that as a yes!" Nino replied, still grinning. He angled his head to the side so he could take a good look at the van. "You know, I really love this van. What I like most is how big it is. I mean, Sho's nostrils are bigger than my hand, so your entire outfit must be... well, it's impressive. And so much more astounding up close."
Now that the confusion had cleared and Jun knew how the van had come to be sitting in front of his house, he was just annoyed. He couldn't even get to the gate with Nino's (admittedly expertly executed) parking job. "Why did you park the van in front of my house, Nino?" He could hear the plaintive tone to his voice, but honestly. It was his birthday, and now he not only had to deal with Nino, but a truck-driving Nino at that.
"Why, don't you think it's stunning?"
Jun considered the enlarged display of one of his most humiliating failures of all time (it was in the top ten), and shrugged. He couldn't really argue with that - it was stunning. He looked back at Nino. "I just want to get some sleep. It's my birthday and I've been working all day. Can I get past the van, please?"
Pouting wasn't in Nino's repertoire, but Jun could see the desire to cross his features. Instead, he just sort of grimaced a bit before sighing loudly. "If you really want to. But then you'd miss out on the real present."
A part of Jun just wanted to ignore Nino and find a way to climb over the fence. But the part that remembered he had been practicing choreography for his solo in the concert all afternoon and couldn't lift his arm higher than his shoulder anymore won out, and his shoulders slumped. Nino was grinning before he even said, "okay, where's the real present?"
Nino walked quickly around to the back of the van, skipping his fingers excitedly over the outside as he went. Jun followed behind lazily, hitching his bag higher onto his shoulder, trying not to admit to himself that he was a little curious as to what Nino was doing. Nino looked a little awkward as he grabbed onto handles and hauled himself up onto a step-ladder, teetering on the edge of it as he unlocked bolts that were easily larger than his head, and Jun wondered if he was going to open the roller door without falling back onto the pavement.
After a few more seconds of fiddling around, Nino looked at Jun over his shoulder. "Happy birthday, Matsujun," he said with a smile - a genuine one this time - as he swung the roller door up to reveal --
"SURPRISE!!" Voices rattled around the spacious interior of the van, which was decked out with lights, balloons, streamers and, of course, a large poster of him in his losing Mannequin Five outfit. There was a table and chairs set up at the back corner, and someone hit "Play" on the sound system that was wrapped in protective gear. The assortment of people there was bizarre - staff and friends and a couple of sempai who clearly had nothing better to do on their night off - but the best part of all was the other members of Arashi, who were all wearing their most disastrous Mannequin Five outfits. Even Nino, whose pants looked much less normal under the disco ball lights, was wearing something horrific under the dark cardigan he had been wearing before (Jun suspected he had cheated and raided the VS Arashi closet).
"You guys..." Jun began, but stopped himself. He was still tired and wanted to sleep, but looking up at everyone's faces, he knew he couldn't turn down just a couple of drinks. "Help me up there already, will you?"
fin.